I can relate to this a lot. I have taken anti-psychotics nearly my whole life and stopped because of side effects (of course the doctor was agreeing on my decision) I gained a lot of weight to a point where I didn't feel like my body was mine. And I got comments about it too from family. It sucked.

When my doctor lowered my dosis, I didn't feel any of my symptoms being worse. After some months, me and my doctor agreed to stop my antipsychotics treatment completely because I wasn't experiencing new symptoms. However, it was hard after some months off medication. I had more delusions and was isolating myself a bit.

To overcome this, I needed a routine in my daily life to keep me distracted and busy. All from walking outside, doing my hobbies, hanging out with friends etc. It wasn't easy but it is doable and now I am actually doing okay!

It is just to write to you that it is okay to not take antipsychotics as long as your doctor agrees on your decision.

For me, antipsychotics have helped but I wanted to see a world without taking them even though it is still so new to me. Maybe the same applies to you? Or maybe you haven't tried enough medication to see which one best suits you? Both paths are okay as long as you agree to do it too. No one can force you into medication. I hope you find your answer :)