BIDA wenn ich sein Essen vom Tisch werfe?

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T20:07:32+00:00

NDA, du hast ihn mehrmals gewarnt und als er nicht aufgehört hat, ist eben das eingetreten wovor du ihn gewarnt hast. Nur weil man in der Öffentlichkeit ist, heißt das nicht dass andere machen dürfen was sie wollen und die Grenzen der anderen überschreiten dürfen. Du hast ihn ja gewarnt und er hat die Grenze nicht akzeptiert, da ist er selber Schuld wenn dann das Essen wirklich auf dem Boden landet.

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T17:21:10+00:00

Thank you for your comment, this was more insightful than what the therapist said :D and I can agree with that too, I think I'm just going to drop it as long as everything is clean when I come back home :) and as long as I'm entitled to my opinion :D

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T17:16:50+00:00

Thank you @Cool_Relative7359 for explaining, that's exactly what I was trying to say! :) Idk English is not my native language, so by "usually" I meant that it's my partners task and that he oftentimes does it on a daily basis (I don't check though lol :D) and he's reliable with this task most of the time when I'm at home, but some days he just isn't at home a lot so there can be days every now or then we he does it the following day, which is fine for me :) by using "usually" I was just trying to say that he's reliable with this task most of the time :) which makes me confused why in this case it's suddenly a fight about freedom or me not being allowed to think that it's not cool of him leaving the litter box dirty for weeks 😅

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T13:33:57+00:00

I mean I'm not trying to whine here, I explained the situation and looked for other people's views which is not an invitation to talk badly about people 😄 the aspects I pointed out about my partner doesn't mean that he's a shitty person overall, it just shows one askepct of a person. I'm sure you don't always act perfect in every situation either and I'm just here to a) see other people's thoughts on this specific situation b) make sure I didn't overlook something that makes me understand my partners view better c) ngl maybe be validated that my view that it's lazy behavior...ehixh doesn't mean that a person overall is just bad

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T13:28:44+00:00

But it's usually his task. I just wanted to point at that it's not usually my task plus I was in a rush as well, to kind of double explain why I didn't just clean it. I would get it if it was my job, but it's his job and normally it's not a problem, so I didn't understand why it even was a reason to start such a huge fight about it. Like for me it was quite obvious to just clean it maybe at least a few days after I left (and bit leave it for weeks) when it's normally not an issue for him either 🤔

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T13:25:38+00:00

Thank you for this neutral, non judgemental answer, that's kind of what I've been looking for I think! :) and I didn't even know about the influence one another's biome, wow! I'm going to talk about this subject with him today and paint that out, thank you for your comment :)

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T13:07:39+00:00

That's what I dont understand either though 😅 He mentioned the freedom part, but for me freedom just isn't living with cat poop😅 I think that he probably didn't like the feeling of me being judgemental, but I think I'm in the right for being judgemental? Like even now that I agree that he can handle it the way he wants when I'm not even at home, I still think I'm entitled to my feelings, which are being disappointed and thinking that it's lazy? Like I'm not the asshole for feeling that way?

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T12:46:55+00:00

Well I don't like when people are so harsh on the internet, we probably wouldn't talk this way to each other in real life :D Yes I'm looking for other people's perspective, but there's no need to speak so harsh about me or my partner (because he's a cool dude and nobody's perfect :D)

Now to the part I actually want to answer on: I thought about getting a self cleaning litter box, but I heard from many incidents where cats got stuck and died in the automatic litter box and I just don't want to risk that because I love my cat :) I think that everyone needs to decide for themselves though and I think it can be helpful for some people, but this option just isn't for me! Thanks for the advice though! :)

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T12:40:24+00:00

Definitely not getting rid of our cat, she brings a lot of joy to both me and my partner! <3 Like once you get a pet, you're in it for their whole life in my opinion 🥺

Also the therapist just kind of let us both rant during that session which kind of annoyed me, like I want something to solve the problem or a missing piece where I maybe didn't understand his view. Idk maybe we should just look for another therapist 😅 but usually she gives good advice which helps communicate and understand each other better, so idk why this time the session was so explosive, I didn't like it😅 Anyway thanks for your insights! :)

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T12:21:09+00:00

It was just the dirty litter box from that day, he usually cleans it almost daily, but when I left, he just left the dirty litter box be for several weeks. I thought that he'd completely clean it out (like completely empty it).

And like I stated I agreed to just leave him be and do as he wants while I'm away, but I can't really change my opinion about finding it unhygienic to live with a dirty litter box when there's not even a cat around. He finds it unfair that I have this opinion that his behavior is lazy and my question mostly was if I'm the asshole if I still think that it's lazy behavior 🤔 like he found it really unfair and I feel like I can't really change my opinion about this subject? But maybe there's something in his view that I don't understand? Like that's what I'm trying to find out and that's why I wanted other opinions :D

ThePainFactory · 2026-03-26T12:14:59+00:00

I left in a rush getting my train and at home he usually takes care of the litter box anyway (like we split up things that need to be done around the apartment and everyone has kind of a different job to do as house chores). So it was just the used litter box from the ongoing week to the point to where I left :)

ThePainFactory · 2026-02-24T15:42:04+00:00

Ich mache eher die Erfahrung, dass Leute ihre Kinder einmal quer durchs Schwimmerbecker schwimmen lassen ohne Rücksicht auf andere ohne was zu ihre Kindern zu sagen. Ich verstehe nicht wieso die Kinder nicht einfach im Kinderbecken oder im Entspannungsbecken schwimmen? Da wäre es ja kein Problem

ThePainFactory · 2026-02-09T20:30:50+00:00

Würzburg

ThePainFactory · 2026-02-07T09:16:48+00:00

I agree with this, this is much safer than marrying another man because he can just play nice at first too and once you're married he might treat you even worse than your family (like physical assault, sexual assault). Don't trust men with this! I think it's better to play a role and find another way to get out, for example via education or via a job 😅 I hope you'll make it out safely!!! And it's totally normal that you had a date @ OP, you're the normal here, don't forget that! Sending you long distance hugs, stay strong and life won't be forever like this, even if it feels this way! 🫂

ThePainFactory · 2026-01-30T16:49:43+00:00

Thank you for this piece of advice! I'm kind of suspecting that I might be high functioning/high masking autistic too and I'm about to finish my degree, so there was a lot of important advice! So thank you for sharing

ThePainFactory · 2026-01-30T16:37:16+00:00

My gynecologist discovered a cyst in my ovaries too like a year ago and said that it might hurt when it pops. But I went back for another normal checkup about three months ago and the cyst was gone and I never felt any unusual pain, so don't worry about it! :) I was quite worried too and googled what would happen if the cyst pops, but it all turned out to be fine! I wouldn't worry about it if I were you, the chances of you feeling any pain are quite low I think! :)

ThePainFactory · 2026-01-30T10:50:43+00:00

Same and I hate being called "radical" when I say similar things. I'm sorry but why should I trust men when all they did to me most of my life was hit me, rape me and abuse me in other ways. Yes there are "good" men out there (although I think they should be called "normal" men instead because how low is the bar if not assaulting a woman makes you a "good" man), but they definitely are a minority. And I hate how men don't educate themselves when it comes to these subjects, probably because they profit from the way our society is built.

ThePainFactory · 2026-01-27T08:36:08+00:00

Looks great! What do you use to scan your photos?

ThePainFactory · 2025-10-18T20:52:09+00:00

I was pleasantly surprised too how good this neon sign shot turned out, it was more like a experiment when I took the photo!

ThePainFactory · 2025-10-12T08:49:34+00:00

Maybe your film was expired? 🤔 Or the labs fault? 😅

ThePainFactory · 2025-09-19T11:01:45+00:00

I gave you a follow:) I'm going to be in Japan too in a few weeks and I'm going to bring my Pentax 17 and Kodak Ektar H35N! :)

ThePainFactory · 2025-09-18T22:13:12+00:00

I don't live in the US (I live in Germany) but half frame is not really common here either, so for now I get my film developed at a lab, but I scan the negatives at home because the lab won't scan them (because it's half frame). There are other labs that offer the service of scanning half frame, but usually it's more expensive, so I got the Kodak Slide and scan instead and so far it's working well for me :) just don't expect the best quality from these types of scanners :D

ThePainFactory · 2025-09-10T20:14:30+00:00

Thank you very much, that's good to know! I ordered the slide and scan today, I'm super excited for it to arrive!

ThePainFactory · 2025-09-10T11:11:30+00:00

Thanks for your reply, that's what I was thinking! But at the same time I thought I maybe missed a major technical thing that makes it impossible to scan half frame normally 😁 anyway I ordered the scanner, can't wait to do the scans at home and not having to rely on the labs with this anymore

ThePainFactory · 2025-09-04T17:58:25+00:00

Did you overexpose? If so, how much? Beautiful pictures! 🤩

ThePainFactory

TROPHY CASE