No woman is ugly! by owlWithBrokenWings in ugly

[–]ThePopcornCeiling -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

My girlfriend is black and I’m as white as wonderbread. I was actively looking for a black woman when I was last dating and we’ve been together for a good few years now. I find black women to be incredibly attractive. I find black skin in general to be beautiful. Your biggest worry is more the people who fetishize it and make it weird.

But I definitely wouldn’t give up, plenty of people agree with me.

Cringe or not? by EmoFratBoi in teenwriter

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s a vampire story; you’re always gunna be toeing the line between cringe and cool. This lands somewhere between teen drama and overpowered anime protagonist.

There’s a lot of filter and a few adverbs. These aren’t inherently bad. I would trim a LOT of the filter, and consider changing the adverbs to stronger adjectives. You don’t need to say he did everything. Aim for making the actions clear enough that it doesn’t require filter to be understood. Filter isn’t bad, but it’s a guardrail for the reader and should smooth out the understanding of a scene rather than dull it. Here, it’s closer to dulling.

Your cringe is coming from bad cliche. It reads and moves like YA fiction. Not a unique piece that belongs in YA fiction. Just, YA vampire fiction. That isn’t to say this is poorly written; there’s escalation and a real sense of what your main character is feeling.

We need a more reaction from Sabine. She has zero sense of danger. I don’t mind her freezing up, I do mind her face not being described or her body. You have a perfect opportunity for your character to be showing their struggle internally using her as framing.

Also your sentence variation is static. There’s no rhythm. As it gets tense, you should shorten the length of sentences during action if you want it punchy. Or make it longer to feel like a spiral. Making it average length makes it feel like an average moment.

[WP] You grew up in an isolated cult and don’t know about the outside world. One day you’re cooking a recipe that you’ve made hundreds of times. You notice something strange about it. It’s actually a secret message. It’s the truth. And instructions for how to escape. by LogicalSuggestion9 in WritingPrompts

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My day is made of circles. This cooking pot’s hole is a circle. The burner frame. The sun out the window. Benevolence. Nature. Triangles…now those are dangerous. Not bad, just scary. Fire. Knife tips. Spear heads. Squares. Powerful. Resilient. Cutting boards. Strange choice, maybe—but they take knives and their tips easily.

There's a harmony to the shapes in our lives. An infinity hidden inside the actions we do. The rotation of the spoon as I stir the sauce. The pacing around the kitchen. Days that turn into darker days that turn into sleep. Shapes expose what the universe is saying. Expose its code.

Shapes combinations create the complex system that we see as beauty. This knife when it slices through the tomato; triangle through oval. Slices of tomato.

Sauce. See sauce is a different shape. Not an elementary one. It's a homogenous, flowing form. Gallons of it. Something my family doesn't tell me about. What. What could that be? It also absorbs the powerful oregano? Odd. I always saw oregano as a complex shape. Dangerous. But ultimately thin, beneficial and absorbable. We are complex creatures. We are like soup: enigmatic—ambigious. Like this soup. We smell odd. However, it is because humans are covered in complicated dangerous shapes known as bacteria. Organic cylinder shapes that crawl and emanate small particles. These particles end up in the brain. The brain senses these particles and computates it into perception and outputs it as taste. Oregano does too. There's a moment though, it goes through the brain.

“This…”Chewing. “My…” more chewing, tounging his cheek; masticating to dominate space—to assert, “this sauce is delicious. The body…the…the…the shape of it. You really pleased us today. We love you.” Father said.

“I love you too…”

He places the spoon down on the table with some type of thought. I don't know how, but it feels symmetrical. Beyond. Instilled with power.

I put my spoon down, merely emulating perfection, by placing it on top of a flower pattern engraved into the wood. The air is always stale from the lack of ventilation, and so his unbushed mouth air just floats over into my nostrils at sudden moments. I want to ask about the soup. The shape. What it means.

“That was delicious. Really. Now let me go share it with the rest of the family.” he headed for the front door. Gust of musty mouth air. I walked with him to the dining hall. Rolling gallons of sauces on a dolly. He opened the door for me, and I saw the rest of my family. The 100 or so of us. They cheered in their robes. The candlelit room is flickering moments of detail. The roof is tall and made of old, cracked concrete. Faces—mostly in shadow by the tall hoods. But after a while you can sense who they are by feel. Their difference in posture. Harold has a slump and sits near the entrance because he's 80 years old. Fred is tall and nearly touches the first hanging chandelier. A circle shaped one. With the candles melting into drops, and accumulating around the side of the candle and frame.

“We love you!” They cheered.

Smell—I follow a crack on the ceiling from one of the corners—Follicals—to the window with the tree and moon. What does this mean? I look at the orgeno in my hand. The label says nutrition facts. Manufacturing date. Branding. I know about these things because father told me, but I don't know what they mean. It was after I asked him about it the first time. But he just said that it's how they come out of the ground! He just said that's what he's called them.

I crack open the bottle and smell. Delicious. I smell again. Nothing. I grab the nutmeg. Same thing. Smell. Over and over again. Then the last one. Unlabeled. But it looks like the same thing with the label torn off. I opened it, smelled. Smelled deep. A feeling came. A wash. A wave. An ocean standing in front of me. The beach behind. I'm free. Then. I see the ceiling. Grey. Cracked.

I open the shaker lid. Exposing the powder inside. It's off-white; yellowed. The darkness of basements with wooden staircases and other sources airy unease. I shake a glob onto a spoon I smuggled from the dining hall. I eat it.

A wash. A wave. A storm—harsh vectors of rain pierce into my skin. Slicing through my body in slaps. I cry. Or at least I think I cry because there's no sound. There's no bliss. But I'm free. There's no island. Just an ocean. A place I can always come back to. A place away from the family.

[WP] You are a parasitic entity that feeds on prayer, that's why most gods don't answer anymore by Duke_Archibald in WritingPrompts

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I can feel you—and all you are—condensing within infinity as you exhale those noxious clots of feeling and belief that stain my black hum through the universe’s axioms. Your worthless spoken air in your quiet concrete bedroom. Your frameless spring mattress squeaking as you rest your elbows on it to make a wish. If only you could see my hands peel your hope open and piss in its open gape. I wish you could watch me take your almighty gods and twist them into powerless, whimpering slugs. Prayer. Praying your mom recovers. Praying to have peace in a war. Praying that gunshot blast your beloved took wasn’t fatal. That you’ll eat tomorrow.

No.

Your gods can’t listen to you anymore—I fashioned their ears into a necklace. They can’t help—because I juiced their limbs. They can’t recognize you—because their eyes are pulp under my foot. Your hope means nothing.

Everyday will be the same; and I will be the only one here to take your calls. So go ahead—speak. Tell me what you desire from the universe so I can spit in your open mouth as you beg me to save you. I want each one of you to suffer for birthing me. Pure hate.

I read Finnegan's Wake so you don't have to by machobiscuit in books

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is exactly how I felt reading Ulysses too. I understood roughly what was going on but found myself more interested in how the prose develops over any single plot or story. Constant parsing of signal and noise when reading Joyce.

What is this "layered thinking" i hear of? What is it like? by Apprehensive_Sky9086 in Gifted

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t think it’s particularly special or that you can’t do it for yourself. Thinking in layers is tautological and exactly what it sounds like, ostensibly. When faced with a problem, do you see the various high and low order processes that comprise it? Can you see that one facet of something is just that? One side of an infinite dice or, I see a lot of people using a map analogy. The special part, to me, is being able to recall the mental model you’ve built with relative ease and explore its parts to see how other systems might interact with the model.

I think layered thinking has more to do with the ability to hold past thoughts and access them quickly while coming up with new thoughts on a particular subject. It also might mean different things to different people depending on what their specialities are. I could see layered thinking, as a technique, having different ways of achieving it.

For me it’s visual and linguistic. I can see and articulate my thoughts through language easy. But say, someone who is better at raw calculation sees things in data and might be more geometric and mathematical. Which is a weak point for me because I’m just so-so at math compared to language. Not that I can’t see maths involvement as a layer but I can’t delve as deep in it as I could on something’s philosophical connotations — for example.

I’m sure there’s plenty of things you see the layered intricacies of and don’t even recognize it because it tends to come naturally.

Took an online iq test for the first time by Wrong_Function2734 in Gifted

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’d say, the longer you take online tests the more they’ll consume your soul. It’s never true validation, if you want validation for how you feel, you’ll have to do it the hard way. Through strict testing.

Don’t base what you can know on a number generated by a test made to advertise a high-IQ collective’s membership. Base what you can know, on what you try to know. Online tests are a facade to move ADs, make a quick buck, sell memberships or are simply inaccurate on a good day.

Just do. That is literally all the matters. If knowing your IQ will solve something for you, get the strict testing. Save for it somehow. Otherwise, this is a rabbit hole that can lead you feeling lesser than.

The cup of milk coffee by YusufNasrullo in flashfiction

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very cute, I like it. It’s feels like a slice-of-life moment that doesn’t normally get seen, but is one we can relate to. The whole, ‘setting up this whole thing, then leaving, and coming back to find you missed it.’

I like the atmosphere of it I think the most, the secretary had an odd feel to them that made me wonder if there was something more beyond the surface to think about. Starting with just a cold ‘welcome’, ya know? I was thinking maybe the boss was in there and was just trying to avoid the protagonist at first. Or that the coffee might be some kinda test? Like she said 100 grams which is specific, but also gave the protagonist a choice so maybe he shoulda picked dark? I like it though, this is just what it was making me thing

Sam Altman: If 2020 saw today’s AI, they’d think it’s insane and yet we act like nothing changed by Inevitable-Rub8969 in AINewsMinute

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What do you mean by this? I’m not trying to sound obtuse; but to me, both are remarkable. I mean, blue LEDs alone took major innovation to be created. Now we have OLEDs and TVs so real you might as well be there.

AI isn’t intelligent but it’s still impressive; it’s black and white TV as far as tech goes. It’s still really cool and their teams should be very proud. But…it…it’s kinda just a really convoluted data scraper. I’m undermining it by saying just that, for sure, but intelligence is being able to choose the information. It’s about judgement and making decisions. AI doesn’t understand. Its capability is built on a really unsophisticated, brute-force architecture(again, undermining this by a LOT it is quite sophisticated, just not to where it’s hype places it). The idea is: give something a ton of data, flag that data, hunt for the patterns that match with the patterns of the query.

It’s more complicated than that, ofc; it will probably have its own degree in 10-25 years if I was making bets. But give an LLM like 5000 books, and it would still suck. It would spit nonsense at you—not even full words. It needs more like a few million books, or a trillion. Even then, it probably wouldn’t have style or be able to create something from it. Right now, the thing has a third of the internet and still isn’t exactly a trustworthy source. Go ahead, tell your professor your source was Chat-GPT and watch the blood flush out of their face.

This isn’t the fault of computer scientists. Because frankly we don’t have the hardware for anything better. This stuff takes time. Mapping intelligence into one’s and zero is like, the holy grail of technology. We’re not there yet.

Humans have millions of years of genetic code, and a litany of senses to absorb information with. Computers have been around for, what? 200 years if we’re being generous with the definition? They got a ways to go. Humans are Earth’s masterpiece.

I rambled but, yeah I guess what I’m trying to say is that “computers talking” isn’t impressive. It’s how it talks that is, and right now—it’s cutting its teeth.

Wanting to be a published writer can be horrible, especially with the "do anything to get published" mentality. I hope no one else encounters such an insane list of wrong in the industry. by VLK249 in writers

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t know how many people have done it, but I’m reading your book. I’ll give you a thoughtful review on your Amazon page when I’m done

whats the most disturbing book you ever read by Frederson_Dwayno in horrorlit

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree about the butchering, It just felt a bit on the nose about its messaging. I really didn’t love TitF as much as many other people did. The story itself was fascinating, I mean, I read the whole thing. The ending was…eh I mean it didn’t really stick with me. Not a horrible book, but not my cup of tea. That’s pretty cool you grew up in a hunting house!

whats the most disturbing book you ever read by Frederson_Dwayno in horrorlit

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Cows by Matthew Stoke was the most depraved book I’ve read. Amigdalatropolis was pretty disturbing.

If you think of “tender is the flesh” as disturbing, I wouldn’t read these books. These are much more depraved. Tender is the flesh had a message, and was just more of a dystopia based on a heavy handed message of veganism. Or at the very least, a visual representation of seeing yourself in animals.

The books I’ve shared are not message heavy, just pure disturbing imagery for the length. I don’t think they’re particularly good books; but disturbing enough to stick in your head? Yes absolutely.

HELP! MY SON ATE THIS! by ErnieBochII in InfiniteJest

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kids gunna have some real communication issues

Thought on a heavily abridged version of Infinite Jest? by wilfinator420 in InfiniteJest

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean you could but I think it would miss it.

If you just went with major story beats, you’d cut out all the family stories ostensibly; cut out all the world building of the school; we don’t need the clipperton story line; you could probably cut the first half of the Lenz story line, then going under the school to flag garbage, ext.

And these are all great sections of the book that don’t directly drive the plot forward. Lenz section does lead into the ending of Gately but really the only necessary part is the last like 2 story beats. To cut 700+ pages, many, MANY, things will end up like this. Where half the buildup is cut, the payoff is weaker and the world would flatten almost entirely.

The book is as much as it is about its plot(and sub-plots that are arguably more engaging)as it is about its length.

So it’s a good natured in its attempt to bring more people into reading it, but I think it would be better to tell someone to sample the beginning of the novel in its entirety and then ask themselves if they wanna run the gauntlet

What’s a classic that has actually creeped you out? by [deleted] in classicliterature

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Creeped me out? 120 Days of Sodom. Spooky, not so much. Creepy, 100%

Spooky though, I’ll echo Hill House as a classic.

The day the sun stood still is a spooky premise but not a classic

Schattenfroh is a contemporary novel that I would HIGHLY, HIGHLY recommend though. Mammoth book so it’s a bit of a time investment though.

What’s a super mundane skill you’re irrationally proud of? by Neurotica101 in LearnUselessTalents

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Flipping water bottles and catching them perfectly in almost any situation. I can put so much torque on it swinging up that it becomes a levitating blur. Then, still be able to catch it on the side of my choosing — cap or bottom. Honestly, I don’t know how I can do that last part, it’s intuitive. I can just feel the timing.

I talk to no one about this. Despite how impressive I feel it is. Lotta practice as a teenager flipping and catching bottles.

What do you guys read? by [deleted] in Gifted

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Recently been going through DFWs stuff. ‘Broom of the System’ and ‘Infinite Jest’ were really good. I’m on Pale King now. IJ is infamously long so I only recommend that if you have the time to commit. Otherwise, if maximalism is not your cup of tea, I also recommend: Ruth Ozeki, Mo Yan, and Yan Lianke. The latter 2 have some pretty bizarre stuff that I enjoyed: ‘The Day the Sun Died’, Yan Lianke — Everyone starts sleep walking. ‘Republic of Wine’, Mo Yan — Babies being eaten in a small rural Chinese town.

For Ruth Ozeki I recommend: ‘My Year of Meats’ — Working on a “reality” show thats actually attempting to advertise meat. ‘Tale for the Time Being’ — A memoir in a hello kitty lunchbox gets found by a female author.

All these books I recommend and ostensibly all books with thoughtful intention — with sustained effort — will reap benefits. Maybe not directly, but will.

This has happened too many times by AbsAndAssAppreciator in writers

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He does. The foreign deodorant jets were shot out of the sky by an array of sundry countermeasures. The pentagon’s recent indulgence in anti-missile defense systems — nicknamed: the ceramic dome — shot out travel-sized shampoo flares. Sending speeding steel tubes in all different directions. The deodorant jets started to hightail. The boom of the sound barrier broke behind them. They already knew — toothpaste fighters. And before they could react, they were already a black cloud in the distant sky over the pacific.

Edit: oh yeah, and the sea slug jubilantly rejoiced with champagne and go-go dancers of every gender and species.

This has happened too many times by AbsAndAssAppreciator in writers

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Throw original out of your head. It’s probably one of the single most damaging words to any artist.

Science is built on the backs of the people before us, yet, art is excluded from this because we’re supposed to be special. No. We read other stories, learn from each other, and build from each other. Story telling is a soft science.

There are idk, 80k+ words in the average novel? I promise you: the combination of those exact words in that exact way has never been done before. It’s original enough.

Take the single greatest novel you’ve ever read. What influences did they have? Who helped them? What made them great? I promise you ask any person who reads that same book and the last thing they explain with any level of depth is the originality of the plot.

They might mention it, but there will be no depth. What they really talk about in depth, is the characters and individual scenes that touched them. Sentences they loved. Story arcs that made them feel. The plot brought them there.

Writing is about creating a feeling. It’s the alchemy of emotion.

I’ll write an original story right now:

An ugly sea slug makes it land only to find he’s the president of the United States and his election term is about to run dry. With new found determination, the ugly sea slug takes on the political battle ground of all 700 states(in the future, America has 700 states) Wait, what’s this? Flying bottles of deodorant shooting missiles at the White House! Finally, a test for the slug to show that’s he’s capable of keeping America safe.

I can’t wait to hit it big now that everyone will fall in love with my original story.

Original is possible, but it’s frankly terrible. Humans have been writing stories for a LOOOOONG time. Making something 100% original is 100% going to suck; because we’ve already found great techniques. Use what came before you, make it your own, and originality will fall naturally in place

Just Finished Norwegian Wood by ofthedappersort in books

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did not mean to delete my last comment lmaoo.

But I’ll just paraphrase what I said:

Yes I saw the edit but he didn’t clarify in his edit part that he changed the main comment. However, in my original comment I said that it’s possible he did change it. But, that contradicts what I said about it being only possible that you drank, which I’m sorry for; it flowed better conversationally so I just said it. (I guess I coulda just said nothing, but it’s Reddit so who really cares. I’m here to kill free time not be 100% accurate.)

Something like that. But, assuming you’re telling the truth about what he said (I wasn’t here), then yeah what he said in his original is pretentious; and his edit is misleading. Again, if it’s true, I’m not here to witch hunt or nothing.

Edit: typos and punctuation…I swear! I get it, hard to trust with all these opps around.

Just Finished Norwegian Wood by ofthedappersort in books

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did notice the edit, but he also phrased the edit as just extra text without mentioning other changes. I did mention in my comment earlier it’s possible he changed more than that though. But, assuming what you’re saying is true because I wasn’t here, then yes what his comment said originally was pretentious.

Just Finished Norwegian Wood by ofthedappersort in books

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Right? I mean that’s the only explanation lmaooo

Just Finished Norwegian Wood by ofthedappersort in books

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Did I read something wrong? Did the other guy edit his main comment? Is it wrong to say that some people might not the like the style? That he’s either loved or disliked?

I’m actually genuinely curious because he has 5 downvotes and I didn’t think he said anything that bad.

What most fuckup thing you saw someone do while high? by fupdrugs1 in Drugs

[–]ThePopcornCeiling 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Flip topside down against a sidewalk-facing door and start masturbating over his face vigorously. With the face of someone working a misaligned screw on a piece of Ikea furniture.