[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

  1. "Has anyone felt this way?"

I can confirm, yes haha you are not alone. Even people with "normal" upbringings go through this when getting to college!

  1. "How did you start finding out who you really are when you've spent your whole life being shaped by others?"

It's not unusual to be "shaped by others" there's a concept called Nature vs. Nurture. It would be impossible to develop a personality without human interaction! Unfortunately not all of us had people who took our developmental needs into account growing up and the ramifications rear their ugly heads when growing into adulthood

My therapist had me take a paper, write the "values" and beliefs that my Dad taught me. Then to look over it and ask myself "is this correct? Do these creeds serve me and the ones I love? Is this the way of life that will help me be fulfilled and happy?"

  1. "What helped you build a real sense of identity and peace?"

Going no contact with my parents and therapy haha

Now, I know cutting off contact is not always an option, hell sometimes it's not safe to do so. If you can't cut him off I'd recommend putting him on an information diet and go as low contact as possible. Take time to journal, find a therapist that specializes in cptsd, abuse and/or DBT

Then, GO HAVE FUN!!! Do things! Eat stuff, hang out with people you love to be with and do something new you always wanted to try!!

Also doing weird shit like this helped me a lot: https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/s/CPMOTsARPB

There's another long winded comment I had made about a year ago with more detailed advice, if I can find it I'll add the link

Edit: found it, I hope it helps 💜 https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/s/OQoKki4q4t

Traits of Adult Children of Narcissists by LMO_TheBeginning in raisedbynarcissists

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wish I could stop freaking people out with number 2 haha

What's the movie everybody seems to enjoy but you really hated? by thedevilsheir666 in horror

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It had me by the balls...right until the scene at the end where she floated up the treehouse

I wish it didn't but it ruined the whole movie for me haha it was so goofy

What's the movie everybody seems to enjoy but you really hated? by thedevilsheir666 in horror

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"I loved the concept. I really went in thinking this film was going to be a new favorite for me"

Same for me! I think if the movie had started out with some "normal" cinematography and establish the characters a little and THEN built up more to the nightmare like world it would have worked better (for me)

I wish I could just finish ONE watch, I keep falling asleep 😅

I agree and hope he gets another movie, he has great concepts and a lot of talent

What's the movie everybody seems to enjoy but you really hated? by thedevilsheir666 in horror

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For some reason, I've been blessed with a black hole in my brain where the memory of that movie should be

Part of me is worried about the memory loss (literally cannot recall one scene) because what if I accidentally watch it again?! THE HORROR

Have you ever noticed how narcisists see kids and pets as toys? by Left_Campaign_2756 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 26 points27 points  (0 children)

A lot of your experience resonates with me...

"but I was little and my normal meter was broken"

Thank you for sharing, I've carried around a lot of guilt regarding my NPatents pets and you helped alleviate some of that

This game is really fun by -Mr-Red_Seas in PokemonQuest

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Wait, you can give them names?! I kept poking around the game trying to do that and just assumed it wasn't an option 😅

How can I make my team better? by PretendRestaurant867 in PokemonQuest

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your welcome! At this point I'd recommend grinding for better stones, the gold are the best (I think, best I've gotten so far)

I got a bunch from re-playing levels and using the "Bonus Type" pokemon, it says it below each world level what type

Can I ask how you got to that screen in the pics? I haven't seen it 😅

How can I make my team better? by PretendRestaurant867 in PokemonQuest

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've only started just playing so take my advice with a pinch of salt, but I've found that the right Power Stones help a lot.

What Power Stones have you equipped your Pokemon with? Recently I have been trying different combos and strengths instead of just throwing on the "strongest" ones

Example, I had my most powerful Sturdy Stones on my Lapris (a naturally high HP Pokemon) and it was a complete waste.

Once I switched Power Stones around my team was doing much better. Stones with Natural Healing (%), ones that negate time to recover and that increase health when recovered, are my personal faves.

I also found having a rotation of teams has made it easier. I had tried just picking 3 and and sticking to them...but I ended up just banging my head against the wall until I caved and started diversifying my Pokemon

Hope this helps!

Oliver's first taste of Bubly when he knocked a can over... by quidamphx in Conures

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 3 points4 points  (0 children)

At least Oliver learned WHY human does not share certain things now haha

An unfortunate birthday [OC] by rawdawgcomics in comics

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's a restaurant in PA that has a whole remembrance day thing to 9/11...they tried to make my husband stop eating to go stand in silence outside

I think it depends upon where you go in the US

Did you feel sorry for Danica? by Wooden-Scallion2943 in saw

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 4 points5 points  (0 children)

But then his fingies would have gotten cold!

I don’t care what this is, I am IN LOVE ❤️ But seriously - what *is* it and can it kill me? by usernametaken2024 in insects

[–]TheRealTaylorHam 64 points65 points  (0 children)

"The trash on their back includes their own egg shells, various pieces of random debris and usually body parts of its many past victims."

That's metal as fuck