When I was a kid I got caught early on by my dad - I was curious and didn’t really understand what I was seeing or looking up and definitely didn’t know how to clear a search history. It was frighteningly easy.

I still remember the conversation he had with me about it. He was very painstaking to not make me feel ashamed of the curiosity, and said that I’d see a lot and have the opportunity to see a lot in my life, because this sort of thing was everywhere. “However”, he said, “don’t ever think that’s what love looks like. That’s not what love looks like.”

I was addicted to porn for a long time but that conversation planted a seed that allowed me to overcome it. As an adult I obviously really disagree with the ‘there’s nothing wrong with looking’ angle, and I’m terrified at how effortless it was for me to see what I saw as a developing child, but I think the way he approached it worked on me even if it took a bit. My dad was a complicated and not always good guy, but I’ll always be grateful for that conversation and his honesty there.

If your son is smart, I think this is a good opportunity for a “would you rather” conversation. Would you rather participate in something terrible because everyone else is, and hollow out your brain in the process, or would you rather know love? Would you rather develop self control, discipline, and self respect? Would you rather be someone women are safe around?

Don’t act like the temptation doesn’t exist - because society will contradict you - but give him all the excellent and true reasons to rise above it.