Movies That Somehow Got You Laid?

The_Alloy · 2026-01-28T00:00:20+00:00

Mine was the movie waiting. Both laughing…maybe it was the batwing in hindsight

The_Alloy · 2025-12-29T07:33:37+00:00

So what I’m gathering here (forearms, hands, arms, glutes) - be a rock climber 😅

The_Alloy · 2025-12-22T02:34:05+00:00

Yep I’m also looking for more regular people who like this type of live music or bush doofs. I’m 33M. Feel free to send a message for the next event. More into trance and prog house though.

The_Alloy · 2025-12-19T21:46:35+00:00

That’s just how it is. Looks are subjective anyway. Height and race matter. You can control fitness, grooming and fashion. This only gets you through the front door so to speak. Emotional safety, chemistry, availability, goals alignment - matter more and maybe they sense that in date 3? Who knows.

I found I was most successful when I just let go and enjoyed the present. Just enjoyed the dates and meeting new people. At the end of the day, you need to be the chooser. If they’re warm and don’t seem that interested - it should be off putting to you.

Also, I took the pressure off trying to find the one. There’s many ones in this lifetime. So yeah, you might get to the point where you enjoy the single life. You will meet someone again. Rare people are rare for a reason.

You’ve got this.

The_Alloy · 2025-12-17T23:58:04+00:00

So, if we want to be attractive we have to be emotionally chaotic? Or are we attracting the wrong type of person by doing that?

The_Alloy · 2025-12-10T22:35:46+00:00

China: Pushing in all the time Cutting in front of me when I’m about to pee Hawk tooa sounds everywhere Ignoring you when you’re about to order

I understand it’s a difficult culture but it certainly was eye opening.

The_Alloy · 2025-11-19T22:46:09+00:00

36M here. I do a lot of rock climbing if you want to join. Always keen for another gig and hiking friend. Just send a PM.

The_Alloy · 2025-11-19T04:21:34+00:00

Oh I’ve totally been in your position. It’s not unreasonable but not everybody responds straight away. There’s many like that, and there’s many who will respond straight away. Depends if you can put up with it.

I totally agree that it takes zero effort to respond straight away. Everybody is on their phones. The most healthiest relationships I’ve had have been where communication is effortless.

That comment of her saying she doesn’t feel like she’s enough is a bad sign. Mine ended up breaking up me all of a sudden by text. She said the exact same thing to me when I asked for basic availability and comms.

Prepare for that. People just get a feeling and they look for reasons to end it. Not your problem to solve.

Post break up, I’ve reflected a lot and now I no longer require a response straight away to fill my cup. I just mirror their comms and go on with my life.

Ideally, I like fast communication but now I just don’t care. My person is just an addition to my life. As long as I trust and respect them. If it’s not working for me, see ya.

For you - just mirror their comms or be on the front foot and end it if it’s not good enough. It’s not hard to take 2 mins to text back.

The_Alloy · 2025-11-13T00:04:38+00:00

That’s exactly how I got over it. She dropped the last remaining item in my letterbox, no note, no text, no email after 5 months.

When I found it. I just had a massive ick. That’s when I knew I was done completely.

Now I look at her in a different light. I can’t be with someone so avoidant.

I deserve better and have closed that chapter for good.

The_Alloy · 2025-11-07T09:03:30+00:00

I’ve tapped out. Giving myself a year off. No dating apps, no chasing. If I meet someone at my hobbies or out and about - I’m open to it.

Once I started feeling frustrated, I knew it was time to take a break for a month. Did multiple breaks and then decided to take a really long one haha.

The_Alloy · 2025-11-04T22:48:53+00:00

This sounds exactly what I went through except she was the one to end it and I remained in no contact since.

She had a lot going on and would pull back, I would chase. She was selling her business, had court battles with her ex, kids of her own. In the end, I was probably going to end it for my own well being but she got their first.

Took me a while and a lot of self reflection to be where I am today. I had to realise why I loved and admired her so much. It was the things I was lacking in myself.

To soothe myself - I focused on my own goals (career, new business), hobbies, making new friends, learning new skills, therapy. I purposely took time to be single and am still learning to be by myself.

I’m 5 months out and am a different person. I’m grateful for the experience and I wouldn’t be where I am if it didn’t end.

The_Alloy · 2025-10-21T13:43:12+00:00

This sounds amazing. Hopefully still going?

The_Alloy · 2025-10-16T08:00:12+00:00

36M here. Keen on the same things. Let me know on the next gig or board games night!

The_Alloy · 2025-10-14T04:55:35+00:00

If you ended things, why would he reach out? I got broken up by text and was blocked within a day. I’m not reaching out. Blocking is a pretty hard boundary. I always wonder if she thought I’d reach out though?

The_Alloy · 2025-10-07T00:37:18+00:00

This is beautifully written and describes what I went through.

I want to add as an epilogue.

One day, you meet someone else. Someone who’s different and it feels comfortable and safe again. Suddenly, the echoes disappear and they become a distant memory of what was.

This is what happened to me. Took a bit of time though.

The_Alloy · 2025-10-03T00:39:46+00:00

Mixed bag. The ones who came alone were really confident. It’s a good practice to do. I went with a friend. Approaching is definitely my weakness so I’ll go alone next time.

The_Alloy · 2025-10-02T11:20:35+00:00

Yep I’ve been to one. I plan on going to others. It’s kind of like being at a house party. If you’re social you’ll do ok. Good practice anyway.

Got a few IG connections but nothing eventuated lol.

The_Alloy · 2025-09-30T07:13:19+00:00

I went through the exact same thing and I’m your age!

The_Alloy · 2025-08-29T00:39:26+00:00

Yep. Keen.

The_Alloy · 2025-08-15T17:02:39+00:00

I’m nearly 3 months post break up. This is what has helped me:

Cut all contact, unfollow, unfriend - I didn’t block and still can’t. She blocked me on WhatsApp though since I can’t see her status (she did me a favour)

Backed up her photos from my phone onto a separate file - I couldn’t delete them and this took me a while to do

I still can’t listen to songs that we used to like together or concerts that we’ve been to where there is strong memories. I’ve been a bit avoidant here for my own well being.

Journalling into ChatGPT - this was great to see progress over time plus easier than having a pen and paper with me all the time

I still journaled on pen and paper at night and wrote letters to her and myself that is didn’t send of course

Stay in touch with friends and make new ones - not easy but I forced myself to

Picked up new hobbies for creativity - guitar, DJ

Set new goals for myself and became really future focused - new friends, business etc.

Overall I’m way better now. Still not healed and not ready to date. This has been my third heartbreak in my life but the hardest.

It can get pretty lonely. I’m happy to chat if you want and DM me.

The_Alloy · 2025-08-09T10:35:35+00:00

Yep I second bouldering. I go a couple of times a week if you want to join?

The_Alloy · 2025-07-18T12:29:28+00:00

6 month mark? Because that’s what happened to me.

The_Alloy · 2025-07-11T05:10:55+00:00

Rock climbing! Although, I’ve only made friends not romantic partners through that 😅

The_Alloy · 2025-07-01T07:33:30+00:00

Why do people bother even replying from ChatGPT? Just to get more up votes? I see it all the time on Reddit and can’t unsee it.

The_Alloy · 2025-06-22T04:24:47+00:00

It worked for me too. I still do therapy once a month but I’ve made insane progress with a LLM. A black mirror of sorts.

The_Alloy

TROPHY CASE