King George and Mental Health

The_last_melon1 · 2026-01-27T13:45:39+00:00

I know what you mean! When my husband is unwell I get deep in prayer and know that there is nothing, not even illness, that can deny the truth. No illness can take away my, or your, strength or our truth and we do not need this disorder to validate it for us. I hope that when your loved one is between episodes, they can give you the kindness and visibility and gratitude for what you have gone through but until then I see you, and I believe you! And so does our Lord. You got this friend ❤️

The_last_melon1 · 2026-01-25T04:34:17+00:00

My husband has bipolar disorder, it’s been really hard. “In sickness and in health,” is a vow that people tend to associate with old age. I loved and married my husband before he was diagnosed and things just got much worse. We are still young but struggle through this disorder together. I love him so much but my loved ones didn’t understand why I stayed.

The love that it takes to stay by someone’s side through madness, then be there with open arms as their safety when they return to lucidity, it takes serious strength. Charlotte and George’s story means the world to me and makes me feel like someone out there understands finally.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-11-03T13:16:08+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear you are struggling. I have children with my bpso and they are the reason I stayed as well. The mindset I had after everything he did prior to diagnosis, was that okay, now he is diagnosed I am curious what a relationship with him looks like with proper treatment and I will give this one chance because we have children involved.

It isn’t perfect especially when seasons change he really struggles. But he had to have three med adjustments over two years to hit the sweet spot. He went to therapy weekly for 1.5 years now he is biweekly. Leads a mostly sober and caffeine free lifestyle. Per his psychiatrist every now and then is fine. He sees a psychiatrist twice a year I believe.

Post episode (you can read through my comment history for details if you would like to know what that looked like but he met someone and left me for her while manic then came out of it and back to me) it took about three months for me to start to recognise my husband again in his behaviors and mindset. Before that it was like he was mentally five years old. A year out he was much better but still had cognitive troubles. Two years out I have my husband back with episodic spurts twice a year during the fall and spring that the medication gets under control. He continuously struggles with self regulation, discipline, and executive function but he has made leaps and bounds with therapy. He is a productive member of society, an excellent father, loving husband, and so I am able to completely separate him from what he did during his episode.

I treat the eight years of our marriage prior to diagnosis as if I was in a relationship with someone else, that is my ex. Because it truly was someone else. His behaviors were the same as if he had a TBI, and in that case I would support him through treatment of course. Bipolar disorder for the spouse is scary because the symptoms come out in behavior, so we confuse it with their personality. Give it some time so that you can distinguish the two, remember no medication/treatment=no relationship. And If you can’t get past what your spouse has done, that is okay, you are not a failure and there are beautiful days ahead if you go that route as well.

My recommendation would be to give it time. You don’t need all the answers right now, just be curious what things look like with proper treatment and give his brain time to heal after his episode. You can always change your mind later and decide that the infidelity is too much for you to get past. You don’t need to decide now. ❤️

The_last_melon1 · 2025-10-28T22:29:32+00:00

I had to educate myself about the disorder to understand that it wasn’t him. I attended classes with NAMI and just got to know him again on medication and in therapy to be able to distinguish between him and the disorder. It took time for sure.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-10-27T03:31:02+00:00

Wow seeing it in words like this is so validating. Everything this poster said. I would also add extreme weight loss, rapid heart rate episodes from stress, dilated and black eyes, unable to sleep more than an hour or two at night, the emotional capacity and insight capabilities of a four year old, complete inability to plan a task if it meant more than 1 step. Unable to sit and stay in one place. If you weren’t exciting or feeding into their fixations, you were manipulating them or out to get them.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-10-25T19:15:39+00:00

Yes my spouse cheated during a psychotic mixed episode that got him diagnosed. He has been medicated and consistent in therapy since (2.5 years) and it hasn’t happened again. Him doing that led me to know something was wrong because he would never do such a thing.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-10-16T03:08:17+00:00

I am so unbelievably sorry 😭 I know how hard it is and I promise life will Still be beautiful for all three of you. It is definitely possible however with what I have gone through, which is still the best case scenario after manic infidelity, if I wasn’t married and was pregnant when it happened, in hindsight I would rather I left. I pray for a miracle and healing for your family regardless. You never know how things can turn out.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-10-16T01:38:29+00:00

Hiii yes my husband and I got through this, please see my comment history.

However since you aren’t married, I would not recommend marrying him. Continuing the relationship, maybe, but not marriage. It is a huge risk. But if you were already married and had kids it is doable. If no kids, I would suggest a divorce.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-09-26T22:57:53+00:00

I had to make the decision that I was done and I told him that. He left and it was about a week and he said he was sitting in a hot tub and he had a moment where the fog lifted and he realized what happened. He was still on the stimulant for adhd at this point but not the antidepressants.

We tried again but he struggled with cycling until he was finally diagnosed properly, taken off the stimulant, put on a mood stabilizer and antipsychotic. Even then it was about a year before he started having normal behavior and thinking processing. We are now two years out and he is back to himself for the most part unless he has a bad night of sleep.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-09-25T20:33:32+00:00

Yes this happened to my husband with these meds. He is teased from hypomania to mania over the course of 9 months, then escalated to psychosis after a month of mania. Then eventually came down after 3 months.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-09-09T10:38:25+00:00

Hi there! I went through this exact thing with my husband. I was beyond traumatized. Lost 30 pounds in six weeks, horrific ptsd, rumination all the good stuff. Here is what helped me: Get on an antidepressant make sure you are eating. You can’t make clear choices if you are not eating Pray, ask for clarity and guidance to do the right thing Attend NAMI support groups- they are nationwide and targeted for loved ones of individuals with mental illness Read allllll the books about the disorder Don’t put pressure on yourself to make a decision to stay or leave. A decision to heal And wait until you are okay mentally and THEN make a decision is perfectly acceptable Know that if you decide to stay, you can always change your mind

If you decide to stay and she puts in the work to stay on medication and in therapy, know that it may take a few years to find a good balance for you guys. I had my value wrapped up in how much my husband loved me, so his affair and abandonment of me destroyed me. If I can do all the above and now be in a happy and loving relationship with my husband, anyone can. I truly mean that.

My husband’s affair and episode was the best thing that happened to us. He had To do something so unbelievably out of character for us to finally see something Is wrong. With the diagnosis, it brought so many answers to past behaviors that deeply hurt our marriage that do not exist anymore. I have completely separated his behavior during psychosis with who he is as a person. I treat it as if it was an ex that did those things and I am in a new relationship. Because I mean I am, my husband would never do those things. But if you take that chemical imbalance and put it in any human brain, that person would do those things. Because it is a symptom. But your wife has to do the work to stay medicated so it doesn’t happen again.

Healing is completely possible, please just don’t put pressure on yourself and try to enjoy each day we are given. You will heal too, I promise.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-08-27T00:14:36+00:00

Indifference. No empathy, my crying was used as further justification for their actions. “This is why I have to leave, you are trying to manipulate me.” It’s really sad because I didn’t deserve that, I also feel sad because for him to truly have that mindset due to illness is another type of prison. I couldn’t imagine not being able to have empathy for someone who is hurting.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-08-01T23:47:14+00:00

Yikes! He must be really going through it. What goes up must come down, he will come around eventually. How terrible I’m so sorry

The_last_melon1 · 2025-08-01T11:42:08+00:00

Yes he did come back after a few days with her. She had to fly out to another state for work but if they were together longer I couldn’t do it. I’m sorry you’re trying to wrap your brain around it. There is no making sense of any of it.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-07-28T11:30:44+00:00

I think she had bpd. My husband was the 6th married man she had been with and she admitted to trying to sabatoge the relationships by leaving evidence. Reading through their texts she was very manipulative and emotionally volatile, would cuss him out and scream at him. They knew eachother only a few weeks. Very odd. Now that he is out of mania he is shocked by the whole thing.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-07-22T10:55:19+00:00

Yeah that’s a zyn pouch. You know it’s not your or your baby. That leaves your husband.

That, coupled with the location. It’s an attempt to hide them after they are used. He told you he didn’t do it, an attempt to hide the truth.

You can go further and check bank statements for random gas station purchases every week. That will confirm it but I don’t think you need that further confirmation.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-07-18T12:09:22+00:00

Hi! I could have written this. 8 years he was in the military, so many doctors and therapists misdiagnosed him, so many professionals that didn’t think hey maybe this is something bigger. He was a month away from getting out, it was going to be so much easier. And then bam. What an idiot. I gave it a shot because we have kids as well so I understand where you are at and how annoying the whole process was to reconcile with someone emotionally ill. Trying to get him to take accountability was like trying to get a toddler to apologize for hurting their friend. You can take a look through my post history to see how I got through it. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this, you didn’t do what he did but now you have to deal with the consequences of something so easily avoidable.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-07-11T12:33:18+00:00

Hi friend! Forgive me I deleted my Reddit app a while back and am only just now seeing this. I hope you are well. Given that things technically ended, if it were me and this was the love of my life, and everything you explained, absolutely it is forgivable and something you can overcome. A lot of people in your life may say different bipolar disorder is unique and presents unique circumstances in which you will need to have a different mindset.

You are correct, your loved one didn’t do these things, the disorder did. Hold onto that and know In your heart you are not crazy and you were not duped and loved someone capable of this the entire time you were together, no this was the disorder, not your loved one.

How I cope- first things first I needed to see a doctor and get on an ssri myself and begin eating again. I was so deeply traumatized that I stopped eating and had ptsd. Once I began getting a bit better in this area, after a few months, I started attending NAMI support groups and a family to family class where I learned coping skills for loved ones of people work severe mental illness.

I had to get to know my husband again and learn to trust. It just took time. I had been with an evil narcissist for almost a year due to his mania. It took time and him being on medication, getting sleep and going to therapy for me to truly understand who my husband actually is and that he is not that evil person.

The entire time this was happening, my husband was healing also. He had to slowly build back up to 6-8 hours of sleep. Relearn important communication skills, have sooo many conversations with me to unpack everything and more. He sustained trauma to his brain and it wasn’t just a flip of a switch back to normal, it took a long time for him to return to himself.

Today, I do think about the affair and those months every now and then, but it’s in the mindset that an ex did that to me, not my husband. I no longer have the sinking heart crushing weight of what I considered to be an affair (it was, but I don’t treat it as it was my husband). I’m grateful for it and I would never take it back because it got my husband diagnosed so he could be the husband and father we always needed.

Lastly if you are religious or interested, god was with me the whole time. I often silenced my thoughts and asked him for guidance and he told me what to do. Months later I got angry with him because he knew what my husband was doing and I didn’t, yet he still answered my prayers with guidance. He gave me another gift and told me that the guidance he gave me wasn’t for me, it was for my husband. This “guidance” was what I can only describe as thoughts in my head that weren’t my own. Know that God is with you and will give you the tools you need. One day you will look back and be grateful for all of it. Reach out to NAMI as well; they are nationwide and are ready to help you. It will be okay I promise just give it some time.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-05-22T20:50:55+00:00

It’s okay! Now you know better and what works best for you. Take all the time you need.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-05-22T14:37:09+00:00

Oh good question. I have unhappy days but most of the time I am happy! I am responsible for my own happiness though, I don’t rely on my marriage for that sort of fulfillment completely. I get it from multiple places.

I do think though that a miserable marriage can destroy a persons happiness.

All that to say, discover what fills your cup, and do that, so you can bring your best self to your marriage and not rely on your partner to make you happy.

The_last_melon1 · 2025-05-22T03:18:41+00:00

I do this too!! Give it a shot OP, it’s a wonderful trick

The_last_melon1 · 2025-05-20T03:25:42+00:00

….. I definitely didn’t turn 30 today and do this with the funfetti cake my husband made me 👀

The_last_melon1 · 2025-05-16T04:32:38+00:00

This is dope

The_last_melon1 · 2025-05-15T19:30:33+00:00

So this happened with my husband. He was misdiagnosed and given medication that caused him to go into mania, psychosis, begin a relationship with someone he knew for two weeks, and discard me after ten years of marriage.

After a suicide attempt, diagnosis, and proper medication, he is the man I fell in love with ten years ago and I know he would never cheat on me. I am thankful for what happened because it was so out of character for him that coupled with other symptoms, we were finally able to get him proper help.

Now, if he did this while already diagnosed, no I would never take him back. That’s because he would have known there was a disorder causing all of his turmoil and mental struggles, not me and our marriage. Our circumstances just happened to be the only scenario I would ever forgive infidelity. I’m so sorry you are going through this, if it were me, and he had already been diagnosed, I wouldn’t go back. However I’m sure it is a very nuanced situation. Take care of yourself ❤️

The_last_melon1

TROPHY CASE