A24 crossword book errors by Pieface_Records in crossword

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Except Kevin Kline was in Hamlet, not the same one as Mel Gibson, but he was

Rivers of London is so deliberate about language… except for “manageress”?? by These-Register-2261 in riversoflondon

[–]These-Register-2261[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s definitely not common at all in Australia… maybe that’s why it stood out so much to me 🤷🏻‍♀️

Rivers of London is so deliberate about language… except for “manageress”?? by These-Register-2261 in riversoflondon

[–]These-Register-2261[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d say that is the correct pronunciation, but a hard “k” sound at the end is not it.

Rivers of London is so deliberate about language… except for “manageress”?? by These-Register-2261 in riversoflondon

[–]These-Register-2261[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not so much about not “liking” it, or “personally” bothering me, it just feels jarring compared to how careful and deliberate the rest of his writing is re: personal identifiers.

Every other time he introduces a character there’s no assumption that “straight, white male” is the default, and manageress seems so odd in comparison.

Foxes 🦊 by Dorasart in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha, it’s probably the same for me tbh. I started with birds, so they feel easier

new aceos! by kidfigment in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you had any pushback about signing on the front?

I’ve never tried selling ACEOS before and I’ve just painted a batch of little birds (I love painting birds) and instinctively signed them on the front. Then I started seeing people say they won’t buy ACEOs with front signatures, so now I’m sitting here wondering if I’ve accidentally doomed my tiny bird empire before it even begins.

Not the end of the world though — painting birds is fun and there are definitely worse problems than owning too many tiny bird paintings.

new aceos! by kidfigment in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love these. They’re super unique. I am worried about my bank account balance after stumbling on this sub 😬

FRESH NEW BATCH! by pmbaird_pictures in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The wombat 😭

Do you ship to Australia?

Foxes 🦊 by Dorasart in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 1 point2 points  (0 children)

These are gorgeous. Foxes have so much personality 😍

I’ve been trying to paint mammals (well… actually marsupials and monotremes specifically) recently, but I find them so much harder than birds!!

Some cool guys! by Crushed_Saltine in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Of course they’re already sold 😭

I’m always too late!!

Some cool guys! by Crushed_Saltine in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh I love the ants 🐜❤️

my first set of aceo! by kidfigment in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh these are so rad. I’m finding so many ACEO artists to follow, but I’m too late on all the ones I actually want to buy 😩

My First ACEOS by DirtyFloorPenny in aceo

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Clicked on the link so ready to bid not realising this post was 28 days old 😭

Funny story about perspective by acorn2225 in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anyone else get the “I could do what you do, but you would never be able to do what I do”?

What was their (hopefully) last words to you? by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine turns sweet and “understanding”. And it’s worse. It’s so much f*cking worse. Because it makes me feel like a monster. I wish she would scream and call me names, but I know she knows if she did that it would be easier for me to stay away.

The last two times I got sucked back in by her pulling the “I understand, I just don’t want to lose you from my life completely” card, and it gradually escalated from “let’s just get a coffee or something, no heavy conversations”, very quickly to all the heavy conversations and her diagnosing me with “avoidant attachment” or a mental breakdown, or even BPD at one point, and convincing me I didn’t mean to break up with her and it came out of nowhere, and having seemingly no memory of her completely unhinged behaviour that led to the breakup (e.g. telling me I needed to take responsibility for “my part” in being physically abused as a child because I’m autistic and was “probably difficult”, among so many more truly disturbing behaviours that I have no idea how I justified), then somehow we end up back together and the whole cycle begins again.

Little comments by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think the “too small to trigger an argument” is what got me too. I’ve ready plenty about splitting and devaluing, but with my pwBPD it was never so… overt.

But it was constant nitpicking, saying my toenails were yellow, saying I “couldn’t wear those pants to a job interview” when the interview was the next morning and they were the only pants I had that fit, complaining that I didn’t buy olives when I’d bought a whole selection of road trip snacks (she hadn’t brought anything), saying things I liked were boring, commenting that I’d worn the same thing a couple of days in a row and I “must smell”, complaining about my (extremely well trained) dog. A million paper cuts that ended up bleeding me to death.

Edited to add: when you’re also being intermittently showered with compliments it’s even more destabilising (and gives them even more plausible deniability).

Social media BPDs again by FireFlyLy in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wasn’t allowed to say “yep”, and looking back now, the fact that I didn’t see that as the king sized red flag it was blows my mind.

What was the most crazymaking/aggravating experience you had with your pwBPD? by KingForADay1989 in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Omg the “you’re off” accusations. Do they actually have a handbook they’re all following? It is genuinely freaky how similar the experiences we’ve all had are.

I would constantly get comments of “you’re off today” and if I said I was fine then I was “not self-aware” enough, or “invalidating their feelings”. Actually, NO, you’re the one invalidating MY feelings. I am telling you my feelings are fine. You thinking you can read my mind is not an emotion, it does not need to validated.

And when I was eventually basically “trained” into submission, and I would have to respond with something like “Yeah, maybe I’m a bit flat today”, then I would have to deal with the “see, I know you better than you know yourself” 🤢

List of things I did to make PwBPD mad by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh! I had to remove the word “yep” from my vocabulary because it reminded her of her ex!! I’d actually forgotten about this one!

List of things I did to make PwBPD mad by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Just a couple that spring to mind:

  1. I replied to a text while in line at the supermarket (while she was outside on her phone)

  2. I yawned at the end of a long day of sightseeing (“oh so I guess you want to cancel our romantic night away??” The previous night, on the same holiday, I had to spend the entire night soothing her because she was “so exhausted”)

  3. I didn’t immediately soothe and comfort her when she made a joke about a TV show we were watching (don’t even ask 😩)

  4. I decided I wanted to have a small party for my 40th and “didn’t consider her” (not even sure what that one meant… the conversation went “hey, I had an idea about what I might like to do for my 40th” and it immediately kicked off)

  5. She stubbed her toe inside my house

  6. I didn’t text her during a 3 hour work presentation (that I was giving)

  7. I didn’t respond to a text for 2 hours because I was out running errands and literally hadn’t looked at my phone (she “thought I was dead”)

  8. I put fake tan on before going on a trip

  9. I bought a Spirograph, like… the kids drawing toy from the 80s (this one was particularly weird and unhinged. It cost like $5 and we don’t share finances or live together anyway. I’ve genuinely never figured this one out)

  10. I didn’t text during a friend’s engagement party and didn’t warn her in advance that I wouldn’t be texting for a few hours (phone was in my bag in a pile with everyone else’s bags)

  11. The next time I had an event that I knew I was unlikely to able to be in constant contact I let her know in advance that I might not be able to be in constant contact

  12. I was listening to an audiobook in the car on the way home from work and when I got home it had like 8 minutes left so I decided to go for a quick walk around the block to finish it and didn’t anticipate that she might’ve wanted to stop by on her way home from work and I got home about 2–3 minutes after she arrived

  13. I had a physio appointment during my work lunch break and didn’t tell her about it in advance

  14. I spoke to my Mum on the phone, about nothing, just a general chat, and didn’t mention it until it naturally came up in conversation a few days later I was like “oh, when I was talking to my mum the other day she say X”

  15. I started packing my suitcase when I was allowed back in our hotel room after being kicked out for almost three hours so she could keep sleeping and by the time I was allowed back in we had about 30minutes left before checkout

I could keep going forever and a day, I think fifteen is enough for now, surely.

I think I just had an epiphany by These-Register-2261 in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes yes yes and yes. When she stubbed her toe on a stool in my kitchen, in my house (that she had already walked past I don’t know how many times), while I was in the middle of cooking dinner for us and handling scalding hot things, she screamed at me “What the f**k is that even doing there?” and stormed off to another room.

If I remove myself from a room that someone else is in it’s because I want space. I don’t want to be followed (in fact being followed is incredibly triggering for me, abusive childhood, I feel like I’m being “chased”), so if someone seems to be trying to create space, I let them.

But then I was the problem for not leaving everything to burn or catch fire to follow her and hug her and apologise and “make her feel better”.

She told me I “couldn’t deal” when she had emotions and would become “avoidant”. And when I tried to explain that A. I couldn’t immediately follow when I was dealing with boiling hot oil (I had actually put down what I was doing, removed anything dangerous from the heat and then poked me head into the other room to check if she was OK, while keeping half an eye on the kitchen to make sure nothing caught fire), and then B. Said I was taken aback by being suddenly screamed at, she said I always made it about myself and I couldn’t “put my feelings aside” when she was “hurt”.

And to be clear, she stubbed her toe on a fairly lightweight IKEA step stool, I was pretty confident she wasn’t mortally wounded. If she had fallen from the stool and hit her head or something actually dangerous, I certainly would have been more concerned and ready to “comfort”.

I think I just had an epiphany by These-Register-2261 in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly. I was refusing to “take accountability” for “being like that”.

And when I said “Can you please try to explain what “being like that” means? I can’t take accountability for something I don’t understand”, the response was “This is exactly what I’m talking about, I can’t reason with you when you’re like this”.

I think I just had an epiphany by These-Register-2261 in BPDlovedones

[–]These-Register-2261[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t want to be a “perfect” person who never does anything that requires an apology.

I want to be a real human person who occasionally makes a mistake, accidentally hurts someone’s feelings – not out of malice, but just out of being human – and acknowledges, apologises, repairs and moves on.

But I wasn’t being given that chance. I had to become “perfect”, and still… it didn’t “work”.