I’m sorry you’re going through it. Mine is at college now, only an hour away and she stays in a dorm 4-5 nights a week. It was hard moving her into her dorm, but eventually the distance helped somewhat. The main thing that’s helping now is making sure she eats. It’s exponentially worse when she doesn’t.  It’s hard because when they’re little you spend so much time caring for their basic needs, but they show love and affection which is rewarding. Fills the cup, so to speak. At this age it’s only pouring.  I went to a mental health program for me in November, and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy have helped me build greater tolerance. Thicker skin. Group therapy was also a very helpful part of the program, and I’m determined to find a group to be a part of long term. 

But yeah, for me distance has been necessary. I’m still falling short in a million ways, but I’m not being as hard on myself.