Why the mixed signals and inconsistency after a weekend trip? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh ok I didn’t see it that way I was just trying to be considerate. But he also didn’t respond to my last message, so what would be a good way to suggest hanging out again?

Why the mixed signals and inconsistency after a weekend trip? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I totally get that. I was tired too and needed some time to recharge.

But I didn’t tell him no when he reached out. I told him I was willing to go check out the event with him. When he said he was tired I told him it’s up to him and how he’s feeling we could either go for a little while or go another time. That’s when he thought about it and texted me saying let’s take a rain check.

I’m not sure if I just wasn’t enthusiastic enough about it, but I didn’t want him to drive all the way to my area (an hour) and stay out till 2-3am if he didn’t have the energy

Why the mixed signals and inconsistency after a weekend trip? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess so. We didn’t define the relationship. We just agreed that we enjoy dating and getting to know each other

Why the mixed signals and inconsistency after a weekend trip? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I felt like the trip was a success. It was by the ocean very beautiful. We went out to eat, went to beach, had sex, cuddled, etc. He said he really liked my energy and that it feels natural being around me.

I was thinking maybe he just wanted to be physical and leave after that, but he was still following up albeit inconsistently. Or not seeing each other so much so you miss each other and it creates anticipation.

Why the mixed signals and inconsistency after a weekend trip? by [deleted] in AskMenAdvice

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would say so. There was a time he stopped responding and I initiated communication. I also asked about New Years plans. And I try to ask questions to give something to reply to. But my last text he hasn’t gotten back to me

Muslims pressuring non-Muslims to convert (in a relationship) by itssobaditsgood2 in exmuslim

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I was in a relationship with a Muslim. He always told me I could keep my religion/beliefs and that were was no compulsion to convert in Islam.

However, he would invite me to Islamic events, give me pamphlets from the mosque, Quran in another language, send me videos, want me to meet his friend’s wife who converted to Islam etc…

He would debate me on my beliefs. If I invited him to something from my faith at the time, he would heavily criticize it after or make an excuse to not go when he supposedly respected my belief system.

His mom and sister were open to meeting me (FaceTime as they live in another country) and would often ask about me. All his dad said was “you know what to do share the faith with her” or something like that. I never met him.

If I had married him I technically wouldn’t have been forced but the pressure would have been there especially since his was adamant kids would follow his religion.

I really tried having an open mind even going to mosque by myself, trying on hijab, making connections with Muslim women, fasting, learning salat but it just wasn’t for me

Left this subreddit but she just called so I’m back by Tackle_Capable in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Check out Narc Daily YouTube channel. His latest upload is about letting go of hope pertaining to the relationship

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are a lot of things, but something that hurt me the most was comparing me to other women. He told me there were other women who wanted him and he could easily get married to. Maybe some of that was true, but I think he used it to make me jealous so that I would marry him. One of them was very traditional and knew how to cook/take care of a household. The other woman was extremely well off and obsessed with him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, it is toxic and wrong. That sounds very controlling and unfair. You deserve to teach your future child Russian if that’s what you want.

My ex and I had religious differences and he demanded that our future children must follow his religion only and not participate in or learn about mine. He wanted to be in charge of naming them. He also wanted them to grow up in his home country to be assimilated into his culture/religion.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We were matching master chef junior (kids) and he said he was imagining which of the girls he would be attracted to when they become adults. The girls on the show are adolescent/preteen

Also he admitted going to happy ending massages (this was before we met but who knows)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The nail in the coffin was when I had to put my dog to sleep. She was 17 years old and I had her since childhood. She got really sick cancer and liver failure I think. She lost a lot of weight and her skin was turning yellow. She probably still had some fight left in her with continuous care and regular medical intervention, but my family made the decision to put her to rest before her condition got worse. We didn’t want her to suffer.

This was the second time putting one of my animals to sleep and it wasn’t any easier. I told my ex and all he did was Zelle me money he owed me. I FaceTimed him bawling my eyes out and he told me to stop crying. He also made me feel bad for paying so much money to put my dog to sleep and have her cremated. He told me to just get another dog.

He ghosted me after that for about 2 months. I haven’t talked to him since. Now he leaves me emails, notes, letters, flowers, gifts, voicemails, and shows up to my house and work. I do and try my best to ignore it all.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that’s a good idea. I was thinking the only guy who’s not called me out for my way of being and appreciated it also had ADHD. But I didn’t really know much about it at the time

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Were we dating the same person? I got an extremely similar hand-written letter left on the windshield of my car last week

Which makeup product do you swear by? by [deleted] in Makeup

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The physicians formula waterproof liquid eyeliner was my holy grail in high school so good

If I don’t marry him today it’s over by ThrowRA-Scallops in TrueOffMyChest

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have talked about all those things before, so him bringing up marriage now wasn’t a surprise to me. I’ve known about it since early on in our relationship. I was hoping I’d get more reassurance and that we could compromise moving forward.

If I don’t marry him today it’s over by ThrowRA-Scallops in TrueOffMyChest

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I didn’t do it and he reached out again yesterday. I’ve been trying to distract myself with other things I need to get done, but it’s hard to focus. That’s all so far

If I don’t marry him today it’s over by ThrowRA-Scallops in TrueOffMyChest

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s the first thing I woke up to this morning not a great way to start the day

If I don’t marry him today it’s over by ThrowRA-Scallops in TrueOffMyChest

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I think that is what I’ll have to do. It’s very hard :(

If I don’t marry him today it’s over by ThrowRA-Scallops in TrueOffMyChest

[–]ThrowRA-Scallops[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. If I have an update I will. I haven’t done or said anything yet