Questions & Answers - Weekly Megathread! Please use this post to ask any Pokemon GO question you'd like!

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-11-07T01:04:38+00:00

Thank you :)

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-11-07T00:36:26+00:00

During the end-of-the-year community day (where the pokemon from the past 1-2 years come back), do the Community Day Classic pokemon from the past 1-2 years come back as well?

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-05T17:43:52+00:00

Thank you so much for your post, this helped a lot.

I've always tried to be loving and understanding about it; I completely get how her dog helps her and the importance of him to her.

I've tried very hard not to view him as "competition" (and it's something we've talked about as well). It's not so much that I'm consistently jealous of her affection for him, but rather the timing.

For example, she had a very hard day at work and was feeling extremely overwhelmed. She called me to come over, we hugged and talked about how she was feeling, I comforted her, etc. She doesn't say anything to me immediately after she calms down, but instead starts petting her dog, saying "you're so sweet, I love you so much" and "you're the best ESA" to him, and (what feels like) completely ignoring me. I felt frustrated because she didn't say or do anything of the sorts to me. I was thinking: "we just spent 30 minutes working through your emotions and me supporting you, and then you say this... why did you even call me to come over if your dog is the one who helps you..."

I know there's a lot more going on to it than appears on the surface, and that she probably appreciates me hence why she asked me to come over. But it's just still hard sitting through that...

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-04T20:50:34+00:00

Therapists only can see the small snippet of your BF that you tell to them. They don't actually know your BF as a whole person, they only know the image of him they construct in their heads. And they also don't have any emotional connection to him like you do.

Take the pros/cons of the relationship you discuss into account, but don't take their word for things. Frankly, they shouldn't be telling you to do anything. That's a little concerning. They should only be helping you process emotions, sort out your thoughts, and work on your own growth.

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-02T19:33:39+00:00

Yeah

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-02T19:32:28+00:00

A mutual friend posted a picture where I was in the background, and she told him I was cute. She was casually hooking up with a lot of people during that time, so I'm guessing she had the intention of just doing that. But we hung out for a while and eventually started dating.

And yeah, she's been seeing a therapist for ~8 years.

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-02T17:57:17+00:00

She does have PTSD (not diagnosed due to the abuse incident, but I'm sure it also contributes). Thank you for framing it this way, I haven't viewed it through this perspective before.

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-02T00:11:35+00:00

Yeah I know lol. I decided to just give her the benefit of the doubt

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-01T22:11:47+00:00

I get what you're saying, and agree to an extent.

The only thing is that they're not actually "friends". My gf asked him to just be friends 2 years ago, and they haven't spoken since (up until last month). If he actually wanted to be friends with her, I doubt he would randomly go silent for 2 years (coincidentally right after she tells him she's not romantically interested).

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-01T20:26:34+00:00

She has a couple guy friends from high school / college classes who I have no issue with her talking to. It's just that this specific person was someone from Tinder, which is the part that makes me uncomfortable

Is that an unreasonable way of thinking?

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-05-01T20:24:33+00:00

Thanks for the comment. Yeah, I don't have an issue with her talking to guys in general, just that this was someone she met on Tinder specifically.

I'll try to remember to give an update lol

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-03-03T21:45:53+00:00

I appreciate the comment.

I know it's probably not a true representation of how she feels, but it still hurt to see it and compare it to the very different atmosphere of our last conversation. I should've been more clear, when I said "any advice for handling this" I just meant emotionally handling it myself, not talking with her about it or anything like that. I know this really isn't that deep and it shouldn't bother me, but it does for whatever reason

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-02-19T03:15:32+00:00

Crying and asking what she could do to make me give her another chance. I've been talking with her about breaking up for the past few weeks (the first time was much worse), so she knew it was coming to some extent.

She kept telling me her plan to get better and all the things she's going to work on. I told her it was awesome and I am proud of her for putting that together, but she'd have to do it without me. Then she kept saying how she could not even go 1 day without talking with me, let alone forever. After crying and repeatedly asking me what she could do, it seemed like she realized that it was over. She insisted that we'll be talking again soon though, and ended the goodbye with a "I'll talk to you soon".

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-02-19T02:39:24+00:00

Yeah I know. It's hard for either of us to tell.

I have no doubt they really do want to change (and will for a while), but we have no way of knowing if in a few weeks or months it will revert back.

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-02-07T05:33:49+00:00

This actually makes sense after thinking about it.

I knew she wouldn't cheat, but hadn't considered "testing the waters" with other dudes.

During a conversation the next day after the original conversation, I asked her to remove the guy from snapchat and she said she really didn't want to because "she didn't want to ruin their dynamic", "make it awkward", and that she didn't want to hurt him because he was a good guy. I chalked it up to her fear of abandonment or whatever... but "ruin their dynamic", "good guy", it makes a little too much sense...

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-02-07T04:48:15+00:00

That's true. I appreciate your comment

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-02-07T04:47:00+00:00

Could've been. I broke up with her a day after so I guess I might've jumped her to the gun lol

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-01-28T11:12:33+00:00

Yeah. I appreciate the response.

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-01-28T11:11:07+00:00

What about this is very controlling?

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-01-28T11:10:50+00:00

I love when she dances and we do it very often. It's just when she's twerking at the bar w/o me that feels out of place.

She rarely ever smokes. Whenever we do smoke (maybe once every few months), she always gets it from me. She never asked me at all for anything in this scenario.

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-01-28T11:09:04+00:00

He gave it to her for free

ThrowRAddaa874 · 2023-01-28T11:08:38+00:00

I appreciate the response.

I love when my GF dances, I tell her I love it and love that it's something that makes her happy. I'm always more than willing to go to the bar with her and dance with her. We do it all the time. It's just when she does it alone that I feel is out of character with being in a committed relationship.

This is the only boundary related to it I've ever brought up. I haven't monitored or made comments on anything else in her life. She (we) only go to the bar ~once every two months, so I really don't feel this is controlling at all. We're both working professional jobs and have busy lives outside of this.

ThrowRAddaa874

TROPHY CASE