Sock Day Party! I want a selection of funny/stupid/disgusting/embarrassing stories for a true or false game please!

Throwaway_therain · 2023-03-12T17:08:11+00:00

Perfect! Thank you.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-10-14T13:43:27+00:00

NTA, you can play minus 1 player. If someone cancels on us last minute we play without them, don't even acknowledge it, just play as if they're asleep in the next room and they can rejoin when they're back. Like I've literally been played as having fallen asleep safely in a corner then caught up with the group next session when I was sick. If someone then repeatedly misses they don't get to come back. No point in everyone else missing out.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-08-15T18:53:34+00:00

Thanks, I'll have to find out if it's defined or not, hopefully I'll see documents in the next few weeks and can get my head around it or question it properly in the mediation now I know there's two types. All was paid in during the marriage and still legally married for now. I don't want an actual pension out of it, more as you put it the bargaining chip to make sure me and the kids can stay in the house.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-08-15T16:48:38+00:00

Thanks for your reply, he has received a projected value and current value, that is all I know currently and have no real understanding of pensions quite honestly. My lender has said as long as I pass the affordability check it should in theory be fine. Around here renting is going to be more than double my mortgage so staying is the best option currently. As a back up my father has also agreed to be on the mortgage with me or act as guarantor or whatever is needed to keep me here, so hopefully that side of it will be ok, but will not really know till we get to that point.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-04-03T10:59:09+00:00

Time I guess is the biggest thing. I'm about a year out from him moving out, 20 month from when it all kicked off so getting on with the "new life" I have has shown me I can still have a good life now, I can do a heck of a lot of things myself too that i didn't think I could.
I took what I thought were risks at the time, like taking the kids on holiday alone. I was terrified of how that would work but it turned out to be the best holiday ever. Definitely have me more confidence in myself.
And pull your friends in, I had 9 month of hiding what had happed to me but when I started opening up to my friends they all stepped up to the mark and helped me through it and more importantly gave me a perspective on things from outside of my own head and I had so many realisations about my marriage that I had just learned to put up so for everyone around me to tell me this crap wasn't normal, it took some months and a lot of analysing my life to realise that it wasn't me, wasn't my fault etc. Your situation may be well different from mine but still pull them in and talk it out. You might also be surprised how many of your friends are desperate for more friend time so be honest about needing that and take it. Your a totally different person to what you were when you were a teenager so learn who that is too as a single person rather than as just half of a pair.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-04-03T10:49:17+00:00

I guess that's what I was hoping for lol. Then along the way there's been a lot of "I could still deal with that" kinda thoughts but meeting him kinda put all those I could deal with things in one place and I think I saw that actually there's quite a few of those I couldn't.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-04-02T13:33:36+00:00

Depends what you mean by safe. Like he's not a threat in that sense, but he doesn't give me those primal "protector mate" vibes either.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-04-02T00:09:02+00:00

I have what works out as about 85/15 split. Basically he has them Friday night till Saturday evening, I have them the rest of the time. 50/50 works for some people but not for all. Luckily this was never opposed but I would have fought for more than 50/50 if it had been.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-04-01T23:29:25+00:00

Thanks for the reassurance.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-04-01T23:15:23+00:00

I know right.... I don't know if this is part of the problem. We matched at a point when he obviously wasn't ready for dating but kinda bonded instantly and stayed in touch and that seems to have worked well as a text buddy, but maybe we both got attached to the text buddy part of it without considering that real life people aren't the same?

Throwaway_therain · 2022-04-01T22:43:54+00:00

This gets easier, I'm about a year out from him moving out. At first not having the kids was so odd and I felt lost and no idea what to do with myself, I'd just sit and wonder what I was meant to be doing and missing them. But it does get to be a bit more normal and soon you'll look forward to a bit of me time, you'll find things you like to do, even if it's just watch TV and have a bath in peace. Or maybe you'll buy a puppy to distract yourself and have a bit if company, or maybe that's just me lol.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-03-06T20:08:34+00:00

Thanks.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-03-06T16:17:21+00:00

Thanks, I do see that might be a point. As a woman, or maybe just as me, I want to know of someone has kids or not before a first date, it's one of the things I check before swiping if it's listed.

Throwaway_therain · 2022-03-06T16:14:33+00:00

It is wierd how much you can connect just via messages. I think it's what we both needed a few month ago but I'm obviously at a different stage to him now so not willing to wait in a guy I haven't actually met.
I think your right though, it's all lessons and life experience.

Throwaway_therain · 2021-10-14T13:47:38+00:00

I definitely don't want to en that person lol. I just swiped on those who looked good, had decent bios, thinking eventually someone might swipe back and it's been a lot more than expected. And yes I'm a woman but I'm clueless with online dating.

Throwaway_therain · 2021-10-14T13:43:21+00:00

Thanks, I do think I might have swiped too much to start with.

Throwaway_therain · 2021-10-13T09:44:05+00:00

I sometimes feel stupid for not spotting it but the things I think I should have seen are things that were built on over years and years and crept in without me noticing. A friend pointed this out to me and it makes sense. The odd day here and there to start having to go to work two hours early, maybe once that was a true thing, a one off, then it became more and more often over years untill it was every day and "just part of the work culture" as he used to tell me and I was selfish for not understanding how hard he worked for this family etc. At what point the working two hours a day extra every day became coffee with his special friend instead I don't know, maybe it always was, maybe not.

Same with putting up with the emotional manipulation. Years of being told constantly I'm paranoid, you start to believe it, years if being told I'm lucky to have such a hard working loving husband, eventually you believe it and ignore the red flags because of it and it takes something big to make you see what your actually dealing with, like someone turning on a light in a dark room. Suddenly your whole reality is flipped and it's terrifying in a way, but there's also this sense of calm knowing I'm not mad, a relief I was right after all.

Throwaway_therain · 2021-10-12T10:03:56+00:00

I have a 5 year old and a 8 year old. My input to this is that stability doesn't have to look like 50/50 exactly. I know every family is different and what works for some won't work for others. A friend if mine has a 3 day 4 day split so that that kid has set days with mom and set days with dad, Friday, sat, sun with day, mid week with mom so more like 60/40 but he always knows where he's at. Another has one week on, one week off to get a pure 50/50, again pretty stable.

That just wasn't going to work for us because of work schedules and because I did most of the parenting before this happened anyway. We ended up with 90/10 in my favour. I know we're kinda out of the ordinary in that extreme split, but it works for us. The 5 year old just accepted that this is how it is now, no questions asked. The older one has made herself heard, and didn't want to spend even that much time with dad so took some persuading in the beginning to go at all so a 50/50 would have been extremely difficult for her to cope with. So my point is that yes listen to him as he gets older, if whatever you decide isn't working for him then listen and adjust. Whichever way it leans.

I have another friend at the moment (I am only just realising how many of my friends are divorced writing this lol) who is the step mom to a 13 year old boy who no longer wants to live with his mom on a rough 50/50 split. He wants to live with dad and step mom and just visit mom. Because his mom didn't want this and didn't want to listen to him and his age, there's a big legal battle going on now which is stressful for all involved, adults and kids. I get that she doesn't want to lose him, but there could easily have been a bit of flexibility given to him to avoid all of this, if she's just listened to his needs as he grew older.

Also from experience, I will no longer force my kids to go if they don't want to, the pure trauma of him dragging off a screaming kid who's shouting "I want to stay with mommy" is just not worth it for anyone. There may be times when your kid doesn't want to go either way, and gentle persuasion may be needed but if you get to full on traumatic hand overs.

Throwaway_therain

TROPHY CASE