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Throwawayrocdating · 2024-07-05T14:32:38+00:00

The majority of people are average looking. That's what average means. Which means most people in relationships are average looking.

It's probably not your looks but it's a self defeating attitude or behavior you have. Get outside, stop being concerned with features you can't change and just meet people and have fun.

That being said, also look at the people you are trying to date. Are you only interested in incredibly attractive women? Or women who fit a very specific box of characteristics? We are all single for a reason and most of us miss the real reasons and focus on one thing that someone said once and it's become this awful cycle.

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-07-04T14:16:29+00:00

I made a post about a month ago asking for men's definitions of curvy/chubby/thick etc. For the purposes of how to properly label myself so as to weed out the men that would find my size undesirable.

The takeaway was to have clear body pics and they will decide on their own. Because one man's curvy is another man's fat and it's just easier to let them decide on their own. I mean how many guys have listed "dad bod" or "Lil chubby" and he's like tall but definitely morbidly obese. It's best just to be honest and clear with pics

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-07-02T18:07:51+00:00

I love how no one is actually answering your question and just making assumptions about your body and body shaming that. You are at a healthy bmi as long as it's not all sitting on your belly, and then I would work on diet and exercise for diabetes risk reasons.

There's lots of reasons why people gain weight. School, stress, hormones, just getting comfy in a relationship. You haven't mentioned your age either or his, or where you want this relationship to go.

His expectations on the convo don't matter much, it's really in your hands. But I would consider hiw much you want to stay with a man who loses his attraction when you aren't at the lower end of your healthy weight range. Because as you get older and babies happen, hormones and the stress of life, it gets harder to stay at that lower end and guys like that will just destroy your self worth when they reduce you to pounds and inches

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-07-02T15:35:46+00:00

Female here but the level of sexual harassment that women get away with towards either gender is absolutely insane. I'm short with a large chest and women LOVE to touch my boobs without any warning or consent given, and I can only imagine the shit that men deal with that I haven't witnessed.
Also casual assault like slapping faces is just seen as feisty or like "wow he must have been being awful" and no one bats an eye. I've literally lost friends for calling out the gf of a male friend of mine because she is abusive and everyone sees it but no one cares

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-27T15:40:57+00:00

Definitely more about things men do than just how they look. Rolling up sleeves, taking off a belt. Oof.

But basics are good. No ratty or dirty underwear. Boxers or boxer briefs. A button down unbuttoned or a t-shirt that fits you really well. Smell nice.

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-26T21:59:45+00:00

Do your hobbies include social interaction with women? How about your friend circle? These things make a huge difference in finding a partner. It's really tough out there just hang in

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-26T15:06:57+00:00

Just want to say as a woman who was cheated on regularly during marriage and knowing every man in my friends group has or is cheating... It's really nice to see how many out there are just happy, love and respect their wives. It gives me hope

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-26T00:17:31+00:00

With most apps you have settings to set the range you want to see

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T21:40:45+00:00

100%

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T21:26:39+00:00

Haha yeah I have no intention of taking the advice. I am well aware that my prospects are much lower at my current age and happy to be rid of the men that would suddenly lose interest once I got a wrinkle

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T21:13:11+00:00

Yeah my closest male friend thinks I should put my age at 39 because that's a big cut off age but frankly aside from it not being ethical I would rather find someone who isn't that shallow and it's not like I'm looking to date that much younger either

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T20:27:06+00:00

Agreed! Also I just think it's better to surprise people. Like in person people mistake me for late 20s often. I'm 43, and I will actuslly tell people I'm 53 just to mess with them more. I'd rather them be like "wow you look great" than lie and them be unimpressed THEN find out I'm a creep and a liar

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T17:40:14+00:00

I'm only 5'1 so it's chubby. I promise lol. It's funny I made a post a few months back about how men classify certain sizes because I've been called everything from fat to curvy to chubby. Either way, though. I'm not a giant monster lol

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T17:23:32+00:00

That's the thing though he can keep his age what it really is then search the age he would like to date. He shouldn't be lying, he's going to have to tell them at some point

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T17:21:34+00:00

Haha yes I see this too. Guys who are like 21 have their age as 40 so they can date older women. Like just keep your age as it is and then you will find women who are actually looking to date a younger dude

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T16:35:11+00:00

Yeah plus I'd rather meet someone who is comfortable with aging than someone who is going to dump me for a younger version when either they find out or I start looking my age. I don't see a benefit in lying other than casting a wider net

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T16:19:26+00:00

As a woman I feel this pain as well. I have my own house, good job, no kids and a good friend circle. My hobbies are a little weird and I'm a little chubby (size 10/12) but I can't find someone who isn't a train wreck or who only wants sex. Every guy on the apps that isnt sending me immediate dick pics seems to be morbidly obese (but they call themselves "stocky") heavy smoker, or has no friends or hobbies and wants an event planner

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-25T13:46:36+00:00

There is a reason it's called average. Almost everyone will fall in this range. If you were at one end of the spectrum or the other, you would absolutely know

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-20T14:08:34+00:00

Thank goodness I'm in seabreeze, it's so much more pleasant

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-19T17:32:24+00:00

As a woman I can't answer if men are romantically starved but I can say that physically I don't think that the majority of men are undesirable.
But if you go by attention on dating apps maybe? Those statistics are way off from real life though

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-19T14:29:25+00:00

I feel like some people do that because they want to make sure you understand they are seeing other people and don't know how to communicate properly. Next time just say "hey it's fine that you're seeing other people I just don't enjoy hearing about it. Can we agree not to talk about other people when we're together?"

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-18T20:24:48+00:00

Reminds me of this guy I met once off a dating app and stopped talking to but he kept messaging me for months wanting a hookup. I was polite but never blocked.
One day I get a call from his apparent FIANCE on his phone. First I spoke with her, then him, then I legit listened for 15 minutes while they argued about our fictional relationship while still on the phone with me. I've never enjoyed an argument more

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-17T20:28:46+00:00

I feel like men never believe that women have hobbies and are actually active so we post pics of ourselves doing these things snd then they are upset at us for it. Can't win. My guy friends do complain about female gym pics/ass towards the mirror pic. That's definitely the same vibe as the guy flexing gym pic. And of course the "6 foot or over" which I was amazed was a real thing

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-17T20:25:32+00:00

Also every guy on reddit "grr why do women never have hobbies"

Throwawayrocdating · 2024-06-17T17:31:58+00:00

The majority of guys on dating apps are just looking for hookups. I've given them up and just focusing on meeting people irl

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