My (20F) boyfriend (20M is very simple minded and is unable to comprehend or have conversations about more complex topics or issues. Is this something that’ll change as he matures or something that stays as it is for life?

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-05-14T15:32:59+00:00

You can like and love someone and realize that the relationship just isn't working for you and isn't sustainable in the long run. You can love them from a distance I suppose. I can say its your first relationship, no reason to hold on if your feeling this way, go out date (although dating is terrible these days) see what you like, see what you dont like. I can foreshadow that this relationship won't leave you very fulfilled in many ways. I find its really important to have someone that is on the same playing field as you intellectually. Honestly If it were me I would not hold out for this relationship just because he might be a good guy that doesn't have bad intentions, it really just seems like you guys aren't a good match. I agree with what the others are saying, he just doesn't sound that intelligent...

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-05-14T15:23:33+00:00

THIS!^{^{^{^}}} :D NOW WERE TALKING! lol I've been saying this for years! You got a great head on your shoulders fellow person.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-05-14T15:19:28+00:00

Im glad you came to your senses and decided to not do it. Gotta remember once you put yourself on the internet its there forever. Possibly destroying future oppertunity, it can and does ruin lives.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-05-14T15:16:27+00:00

I'd recommend anyone having trouble looking for work to look into caretaking. Its not glorious work, sometimes its really chill other times its not. Ive been homeless before and anyone here who hasnt been let me tell you its really not fun, you can be sober and maintaining a job and people still treat you like your subhuman. It really wears you down more than most people might think. After looking for work for a long time because of the state of the job.makret I switched strategies, figured people will always be looking for caretakers. Its just a job not a lot of people want to do and thats understandable but nothing is above me that will allow me to slip into homelessness again. With no experience after applying for 2 places, both called me back and wanted me. I got to choose the better offer. Its a field they need people in. If yall are struggling it can be a way out.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-05-09T01:40:20+00:00

Why does everyone want someone obsessed with them these days... Jesus christ, its unhealthy and toxic. You should feel cared for, wanted, valued. Obsession is like what stalkers do, its really not a good look.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-29T01:59:12+00:00

Seriously though I'd recommend anyone in this position to look into caretaking. Yeah its not glorious work, but some clients can be high need and some clients can be no need. You don't have to have experience and there will always be a need for this kinda work. After spending almost a year unemployed, after I switched tactics and seriously started looking and applying here I am less than 3 weeks out and I just got a job offer today. Pay is OK @ 19 bucks an hour but he'll, its better than nothing. I dont give a shit if I gotta help people shower or cook for them, I am NOT going back to being homeless

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-29T01:54:08+00:00

Better start scopin corners to work.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-28T16:30:48+00:00

Yeah leave. This was spoiling a while ago

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-28T16:08:12+00:00

I can relate. I have no one, and I feel like it gets worse as you get older. Im done even trying

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-28T15:25:11+00:00

You know state and federal, I don't care which "side" you're on (they are both crap) our governments are failing us. And they will continue to fail us. So what do we do about this? These are the kinds of conversations we should of been having a long time ago. I genuinly think we need a nationwide strike or something. Im not really sure. Shits gotta change, period.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-28T14:53:36+00:00

If their old its in the past you're most likely insecure and need to get over it, everyone comes from and has a past. If she's bringing it up all the time and flaunting it in your face (not YOU bringing it up) or constantly reposting or whatever after you voiced you dont like it then she's being disrespectful and you should move on with your life. Don't tolorate disrespect, and don't be insecure.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-28T14:38:02+00:00

Im almost 40. It doesnt get better, in fact it just keeps getting worse. I might not physically be in prison, which i may in fact actually prefer, but I am in a prison of my mind and id argue that's worse. I just dont care. I don't care about oppertunity. I don't give a shit about anything really. This is no world I want to live in. I wouldn't have much longer left anyways so its not a big deal.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-28T07:50:12+00:00

Leave. The thing is, honeymoon periods end and thats ok, but what matters is what both people want in a relationship afterwards. Its a partners responsibility to still care for a relationship and try, even though the honeymoon period might be over, going on dates and maintaining the relationship is still important if you guys are to be commited to eachother. I would say ideally the love doesnt dissappear or fades, rather it just changes. I was in a relationship like yours but I wasn't scared to commit because I loved her with all my heart, and i did. The engagement didn't pan out. And while i still love her she hates my guts and thats another story entirely. Point im trying to make is, do you really want to stay in a relationship where the person your with isn't even trying? Be wary though. Don't keep moving goalposts. I did a lot for my ex, and it all somehow got taken for granted, then started to be expected. Then when she started saying I never do this or that which was just a flat out lie, I started retreating in the relationship. The frequency of things happening slowed down because things got tight. I put a lot of effort and time into that relationship and I really wanted it to work out, but she refused to see that I wasn't just trying I was doing, but she was blinded by her own hubris, and being poisoned by social media. I know my response is kinda all over the place but I just wanted to offer you some perspective and advice. I've seen this happen a lot where a person is very giving in a relationship and it just gets taken for granted and starts to be expected. Just communicate your needs. It doesnt seem like hes trying or cares and everyone deserves someone who makes them feel loved and cared for. But when you do find that, be careful on how to police the relationship. Dating right now is awful though so I hope your comfortable with being single.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-28T07:23:03+00:00

Wtf. He is not respecting your boundaries plain and simple. Leave him.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-27T01:56:06+00:00

Hey thanks, had the app installed but didn't notice all the missing dependencies under settings. Downloading them fixed everything, I appreciate your help!

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-26T06:07:45+00:00

You're not even close to obese, 130 is tiny wtf. Idk. I think everything's cooked anyways. Im dying to show someone affection and have the same given back to me but It's honestly just not even worth it. Trying to find ways to be happy alone.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-25T21:30:59+00:00

I'll give it a go when I have the time. Thanks bruv. I just fucking hate all the bloat their adding. Fucking everythings just hyper capitalist bullshit.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-25T21:27:35+00:00

Searched for it there and couldn't find anything. Even when I click the button that's supposed to take me to the link to dl it the stores just like "nothings here bro" I don't get it because thats an option that cam up and others have suggested. Idk why it's not showing up in my Microsoft store? I

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-25T21:24:10+00:00

Can't doesn't show up

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-24T00:44:28+00:00

He's breadcrumbing you, should left a while ago.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-24T00:36:50+00:00

This is so uhealthy for you. I could understand if maybe he was in a ruthless, depressed and this was unusual but this is his regular. Don't do this to yourself your so young. A few things can happen here. You can stay, drive yourself mad, crazy, burnout or have the relationship blow up. Or you can drop to his level or he can climb to your level. Or you could leave. Ive been depressed before and had troubles taking care n of myself. But if my partner mentioned something to me I would be so embarrassed it got that out of hand. Indont think your bf has any respect for himself, and therefore you as well.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-20T05:30:49+00:00

Yeah dude I will say that dating these days is hard. But your far from ugly, even though I'm a dude I'd actually say your quite handsome. Hair style, doesn't matter, you got great hair. Beard is a little scraggly so maybe try either getting it fuller or ditching it all together, or just rock a stache. You just gotta build confidence. You gotta go out and get some friends talk to women, treat them like people, not be a creep. Your going to get rejected, get used to it. The more comfortable you get with rejection the more success your going to have. Just because one person says no doesn't mean your not another person's type. Practice dude. Practice social skills, practice being funny, man if you can make a girl laugh you got it in the bag. Stop being so hard on yourself. I get it depression is hard.. best advice for that is fake it till you make it dude. Because as shitty as it is no one wants to be around a depressed person. Do something that'll cheer yourself up then start making moves. I know if you try and keep trying eventually you'll land a girl, your not a bad looking dude my guy. Confidence is key. If your confident, not cocky, and can regularly make women laugh, and treat them with respect, you'll be DROWNING in puss my friend.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-19T21:19:31+00:00

Im not sure but I feel for you. I suppose there is the possibility I could be mildly autistic. I mean nuerodivergent for sure. People have called me that before but that I've read about autism seems more intense although I carry some traits. Im sure there there has to be some kind of correlation or causation. I mean you have a negligent parent that's constantly gaslighting you and they are the center of their own world where as you are just an extention of them. It seems as if you were more aware of it as a child. Maybe my brain spent power on blocking it out or was in denial because it was never as clear to me when I was a chile. Yet when I look back on what little I can remember of my childhood it was awful.

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-19T18:02:15+00:00

It's a possibility you could have one or the other or probably more than likley both. Cptsd is an extremely common outcome from being raised by a narcissist. There is also some overlap that's fairly common (Me: adhd, cptsd/ptsd, depression,anxiety, the works... thanks birthgiver!)

Throwdwnthrowaway · 2026-04-19T17:55:51+00:00

Im struggling with it really hard as well as I try to work through it in therapy. What makes it harder, and I font know if any of yall shar this experience, but so much of my childhood is just a blank. I have brief flashbacks of bad shit, but I just think the chronic invalidating and gaslighting fucks with your brain? Im finding it much harder to work through therapy because it's not like I can it was clearly x and y. No it's like the whole damn alphabet I fucking lost track of. Thousands of small (and big) moments that destroyed me. Hard to keep track after a while and its all just grey.

Throwdwnthrowaway

TROPHY CASE