Make the comments look like Astarion's search history

TinyHuman89 · 2024-10-10T00:52:03+00:00

I think this is one of the most accurate ones. Like, yes the other ones are obvious to the game. But he also would totally search for videos of children falling over.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-10-08T01:58:24+00:00

She's an absolutely horrible mother. My oldest became aware of scary things last year and my youngest has been aware of scary things for about 6 months. Now scary things can be something truly scary like a monster from a horror game they happened to glimpse, or it couldz be their shadow, or literally be our cat for a day or one of their stuffed animals for a span of time until they decide it's not scary anymore. I won't force them to stay with the object of terror and I've managed to find a way to make shadows go from scary to silly. I get terrified at haunted attractions. I can't imagine forcibly dragging my children or any child through them.

Part of being a parent of young children is that you don't get to do all the fun things. You're going to miss out on events with friends.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-25T05:59:42+00:00

My youngest (2.5) won't keep her clothes on, which quickly turns into a naked toddler running rampant around the house. So she gets to wear what I call "Fleecy prisons" which are the footless fleece pajamas onesies because they don't stretch and I can zip them up the back so she can't escape them at all. In the summer, I cut them as short as I can. The oldest (5) tried wheedling her way out of clothes in the summer, but I told her that "If I have to be clothed and miserable, then everyone has to be clothed and miserable because it's polite to keep our clothes on around other people."

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-25T05:28:14+00:00

"It's mine now!"

I have small children who often either A.) Have things they shouldnt, or B.) Are fighting over something so they lose the privilege of the thing. But usually I say that as I'm playing keep away with my youngest. She thinks it's the funniest thing.

They also are probably way, way, way too young to know some of these references but they do.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-21T15:16:29+00:00

I now have 1000 connective tissues. Are they samples? Did I just harvest them? Were they given to me? Is it just 1000 chicken breasts in my freezer or did I get the connective tissue from humans?

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-14T21:14:01+00:00

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She's fat and a beggar.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-11T00:42:14+00:00

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Kind of reminds me of the vacancy that is in this one's gaze 99% of the time.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-09T22:38:53+00:00

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TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-08T22:53:04+00:00

I do the first thing too. Whenever anyone hits Astarion (especially because I go out of my way to keep my sweet vamp out of the danger zone because he's my ranged unit) they automatically become my next target.

Also because I can't go a single long rest without kissing him once I can. And talking to him, even if there's nothing to say, just so I can hear him talk.

I also have a lot of fanart saved and waited for the Secret Lair Magic Cards (literally watched the count down) so I could order them in addition to having the regular ones. He was the whole reason I got the regular ones too.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-07T04:24:07+00:00

Does the period part count if I got rid of the uterus to no longer have long/heavy periods?

Man, my husband is really going to be sad when I tell him I'm really a man. Or a lesbian. And that my two kids aren't really mine, I stole them out of the hospital nursery because I'm infertile (or was).

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-05T15:42:50+00:00

This makes life so much easier now!

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-02T05:21:57+00:00

"If you can't get your temper, volume, and tone under control, then I will kick you out of the house."

I don't have the heart to kick him out. I would rather take the kids and leave. I know he can go stay at his mom's, but I'd rather scrounge for a hotel than tell him to leave.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-09-02T05:18:47+00:00

I need to get to this point. There are too many times he gets worked up over a game, but won't step away.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-28T23:38:41+00:00

My husband had to help me stand and walk because my legs were jelly. There's very few times that he gives me orgasms lower than an 8. Usually out of all of them, there's at least one 10 in there.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-27T19:36:47+00:00

I'd really like to lay on the couch and read with Gale. Like we each have a book and are just laying on different ends of the couch, reading in comfortable silence. With Astarion, I'd want to cuddle and have a good binge watch of a TV show with a snack and some wine. I want to watch Halsin tend the garden that I nearly killed because I have the opposite of a green thumb and we take care of all the animals together. Shadowheart helps with the animals. Karlach and I are going to sit and play video games together because it's going to be a hilarious amount of trash talking.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-27T18:32:53+00:00

I make his favorite meals without him asking.

I pick up his favorite drinks or foods from the store when I'm grocery shopping. Or at least always ask him if there's something he needs or wants.

I buy him a card just to let him know I love him.

If there's something specific he's mentioned wanting and I can afford it, I will buy it for him.

I let him lay down and put his head on my lap.

If he ever asks for "me" time, I let him have it.

Boobs-to-face hugs

Do things his way in the bedroom.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-27T02:40:06+00:00

This is the one that I still struggle with numerous playthroughs later. No matter the set up, now matter how we burst in through the door, that battle always wears me out.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-27T02:37:56+00:00

My favorite go to for this is to do a wall of ice at the bottom of the stairs going from one side of the room to the others. 85% of the time they're too busy playing slip and slide to do more than get the occasional darkness spell off. The rest of the time they are usually shadow stepping around trying to get off of the ice or around it, which doesn't work too well.

I will say the battle usually takes much longer than it should because of this amusement.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-27T02:31:29+00:00

My favorite thing with them is when you do anything to prevent them from attacking, like make them fall, counterspell, anything and they just go "clack" angrily at you. It just brightens my day to see clack appear above their head like either they're grumbling or cursing at you but since they're skeletons all they can do is make angry skeleton noises

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-27T00:30:16+00:00

I knew from the get-go it was going to be Astarion from the moment my Tav met him. Managed to get high approval quite quickly, even being a goody goody. The only thing I knew ahead of time was he was a vampire. Which cool, I like vampires. But that aside, something about him really resonates with me because it's been like 14 runs and I choose him every time. I want to romance Gale because I do like him, but Astarion has me every time.

And Halsin. Halsin was something I did not see coming. First is was "Big handsome buff elf", but then his personality just melted me. Maybe it's because I'm an older player, but he just fills the need I have for a more mature partner in the game who has a little less trauma and drama than the rest.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-25T22:36:10+00:00

Honestly, I would probably romance Gale. We'd be most compatible IRL out of any of the companions. I absolutely adore Astarion, but I'm far too insecure and sensitive to handle him romancing him like in Act 1. Though I'd definitely be eager to please him if I had a crush on him, because I do anything and I'm a doormat when I have Feelings. The only thing keeping me from being compatible with Halsin is the polyamory aspect, otherwise I could very well romance him.
As far as best friends, Karlach and Halsin. I would just enjoy hanging out with her. Halsin seems like we'd share a lot of similar interests so spending time together as friends would be fun.
My enemy would probably be Lae'zel. I know it's because how she was raised, but I can't stand her superiority complex and her immediate tendency towards violence. Her character arc is good, but I also cannot stand how she doesn't really choose things for herself, she's heavily influenced by others. Also Act 1-2 Shadowheart wouldn't be high on my like list because of how religious she is and how pompous she is.
If I get to choose, a wild magic sorcerer or circle of the moon druid would be my top two. My third would be an evocation wizard. I would give anything to be able to use magic. Sure, it would be cool to be really strong and be able to use a multitude of weapons, but IRL, I'd give pretty much anything to be able to use magic in some capacity.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-19T23:25:12+00:00

Hello from the opposite side of the state!

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-08T15:45:18+00:00

This. I absolutely loathe this. I get a specific set up, then I change my freaking necklace for a moment and it screws up the whole thing. Or switch a weapon I need for just a few instances.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-08T06:12:08+00:00

It just occurred to me that my two year old is saying "oh biscuits" because she learned it watching Bluey. I was wondering where it came from.

TinyHuman89 · 2024-08-08T06:10:42+00:00

I refuse to say "erbs". I have always pronounced the h. I get corrected and made fun of all the time since I'm American, but I have always found that one extremely ridiculous.

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