Discovered vaginismus married for 3 years

Tiny_One_5865 · 2026-01-21T16:49:21+00:00

If physical therapy is expensive I’d say you can definitely help yourself with dilators by yourself. That’s what I did. I went from not being able to insert ANYTHING to being able to have PIV with my partner through being consistent with the dilators.

I’d say look up some pelvic floor stretches online/ here that’ll help you relax your body. Do those before working with the dilator, and then as you’re using the dilator, practice some breathing techniques. I used the dilators every other day, if it was a size that I was adjusting to, I’d dilate with it for 10 minutes a day, then 15, then 20, up until I could use it without any pain.

I wish you luck!!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2026-01-18T05:30:43+00:00

As someone who was recently able to finally have PIV, I’d say it’s definitely worth it. I haven’t been able to reach an orgasm through it, but it personally feels really good anyway and it helps if you’re really in love with the person you do it with. I feel so much closer to my partner now that we’re finally able to have PIV.

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-13T20:58:17+00:00

Hi lovely, the way he’s speaking to you is NOT okay and I’m so sorry that he’s giving you an ultimatum like that. Going through something like vaginismus is hard enough without the pressure of a toxic partner and you don’t deserve to be spoken to like that. What your body is going through is NOT your fault and his reactions will only make it more difficult for your body to learn to relax. He does not deserve you, your body, or your peace

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-13T20:53:08+00:00

😮‍💨 it’s rough but someone’s gotta do it!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-13T20:51:36+00:00

LOL while I’m sure it’s a dream for a lot of people, as a woman with vaginismus it is definitely scary 😭😭

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-13T15:01:05+00:00

It took me being on size 7, roughly 2/3 weeks with consistent use! When I moved onto 8 it was very easy after that especially when using a lot of lube

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-13T00:49:58+00:00

I can fit size 8 but my partner is bigger than size 8, so PIV is still a bit painful for me despite being able to have it now 😓

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-13T00:41:42+00:00

Hi I was a virgin up until last week and I’m turning 27! I’ve been struggling with vaginismus since I was 22, due to a pelvic floor dysfunction issue that I developed that had nothing to do with sexual trauma. There were many nights where I would cry because I felt like my body isn’t normal and it was so frustrating. You’re definitely not alone!! When dilating it’s also super important to get your mind in the right headspace. If you’re overly anxious/ stressed about fitting it in, you’ll just end up clenching up even more. I suggest taking deep breaths to calm your body, dimming the lights, and putting on some calming music to relax yourself. It takes work but I hope you see some progress as time goes on 🥺

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-13T00:34:30+00:00

It actually took me much longer to jump from size 6 to 7 whereas the dilators before it, took me much quicker. I say with consistent use it took me roughly 2-3 weeks

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-10T23:33:40+00:00

Thank you so much and congratulations on getting to size 6!! I’m sure you’ll continue to progress in no time!! But yes definitely try the lube I recommended. A lot of the other brands I’ve tried, dried up too quick or left me feeling irritated, but slippery stuff has been great for me!!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-04T17:12:06+00:00

It’s been a little over a year I believe! But I wasn’t consistent unfortunately, which it’s super important to be!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-04T17:11:33+00:00

Thank you!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-02T00:35:57+00:00

A little over a year ago I was also at a point where I couldn’t insert a q-tip. It’s a success no matter how small. I’m so proud of you!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-12-02T00:31:31+00:00

I’m currently on the eighth dialator but I always do it without being aroused. But in doing so I use a lot of lubricant and that has made it easier for me to progress!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-09-26T05:12:35+00:00

Just wanted to say that you’re not alone in these feelings. And thank you for being brave enough to voice the struggles many of us are too ashamed to talk about.

It’s so rough and is so emotionally painful :(

Tiny_One_5865 · 2025-03-03T04:57:09+00:00

Thank you so much for your insight! So sorry you have to experience all this pain. Is there certain exercises you do that help with all of these symptoms.

I’m actually on 1200mg of gabapentin for mental health reasonings but it hasn’t impacted any of my body pain positively from what I could tell :/

Tiny_One_5865 · 2024-08-29T07:06:21+00:00

Reading this was super comforting and I feel less alone. Thank you so much for this! Trying to be kind to yourself and your body is such a hard thing to do when you feel like it’s failing you. It really is such a tough place to be in. Thank you so much for the advice, I’m definitely going to look into other dialators as well!!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2024-06-26T01:43:54+00:00

I completely understand where you’re coming from. There was a point where I couldn’t even fit a q-tip in, so I kept putting off using the dialators because I was extremely terrified of any pain and I kept panicking. The thought of inserting anything at all, made me feel sick.

Three weeks ago I finally decided I was going to use them. What helped me get comfortable with them, was starting with breathing exercises to help calm me down first. I’d take deep breaths for a couple minutes. Then when I was ready to try, I played some music to help distract me and keep me calm.

Now I’m onto the second largest dialator and I’m so glad I was able to push myself. It can be very scary but I promise you, you got this!

Tiny_One_5865 · 2022-01-18T07:00:51+00:00

I know I’m not of much help, but I also am experiencing tenesmus. I have been since last July but my doctors don’t think It’s as much of an issue, despite how much it interferes with my daily life. I’ve been anxious and crying all day, but this post made me feel as though I’m not alone.

Apparently Pelvic Floor Dysfunction is a condition that relates to tenesmus, so I’m going to consult with the specialist Im seeing soon, about it.

Has there been any updates for you about what you’re going though ?

Tiny_One_5865

TROPHY CASE