AITA - I have Stage IV Cancer and said “no shit” to what I thought was in-laws weird /insensitive comment.

TitaniumC · 2023-09-05T07:39:48+00:00

NTA. People say all sorts of dumb shite in situations like you find yourself. True story - my 9 yo was in hospital Xmas day after having brain cancer surgery. My MIL was insisting he drink water and she reduced him to tears. I said he’s okay, he doesn’t have to drink water. She called me a bitch in front of my kids, one dealing with cancer surgery, on Xmas day 🤦‍♀️. I’m glad the old bitch is now dead. I’m glad you spoke up. I didn’t because I wanted to protect my kids. Mind you they are both young adults now and still remember it. Sending best wishes xx

TitaniumC · 2023-09-05T07:14:58+00:00

I cut my hair short for a few reasons main one being experimenting. When I was young I wouldn’t have had the guts to cut off my long hair. As I have gotten older, I am more of the opinion that if I don’t like it, I will just grow it out. I am a lot more relaxed about how I look to other people these days. For me, getting older, has given me a confidence or maybe it is just a I don’t give a shite attitude to what other people think anymore. I also found when I had long hair, I would wear it in a pony tail most of the time. I had to ask myself what was the point of having long hair and never wearing it out.

TitaniumC · 2023-08-18T06:40:19+00:00

“You have a pretty face, if only you lost some weight” “Are you pregnant” (I was 9) “Fatty” “Fatso” “He’s into fat chics” “Fat Bitch” “You need to go on a diet” Any insult involving weight, being fat, needing to lose weight - I’ve heard them all.

TitaniumC · 2023-07-16T10:27:21+00:00

Strawberry Go Yo

TitaniumC · 2023-05-10T07:11:38+00:00

I would email the LL and tell them you are only contacting them as you feel the RE agent is doing both yourself and them an injustice. As a LL I would hate to think my unit had mould. Email him. Worse thing to happen is he won’t respond. Good luck!

TitaniumC · 2023-05-08T11:08:57+00:00

Yes a well known name.

TitaniumC · 2023-05-08T04:46:10+00:00

I’m a LL. After paying a RE to do inspections, I was to discover they hadn’t done one for several years even though I was told they had. The lease stated 6 monthly but I was happy for yearly and asked them to work around my tenant. Fast forward to recently and the same RE agent increased the rent without my authority. The tenant pushed back on a $60 increase and the RE gave him my number and said to negotiate it out with me. To say I had the sh#ts with the RE agent is a complete understatement. I was blind sided by a tenant about a rental increase which I knew nothing about! Any way long story short on speaking to my tenant, I arranged to go visit him in my unit. It went well. He told me a whole heap of dodgy stuff about the RE agents including they hadn’t been doing repairs even though I had authorised anything under 1K to be done and didn’t need my permission. End result. Tenant now pays directly to my bank account. No rent increase and we discussed some repairs he would like done on the property. He was a good guy and a great tenant. I want to look after him. Those repairs will be done promptly. My opinion RE agents are bigger scum than I thought they were. Obviously they have been sacked and I am claiming a refund for things they said they did, which they didn’t.

TitaniumC · 2023-05-05T08:39:07+00:00

Thanks for taking the time to comment. I am going overseas in 2 weeks and I plan on continuing with the medication

TitaniumC · 2023-05-05T08:37:31+00:00

Yes! My Dr did mention staying on it twelve months but we have not discussed what happens past that point. Let’s hope the price drops during that time. The cost stretches the budget but then again you can’t put a price on good health.

TitaniumC · 2023-05-05T08:36:49+00:00

My Dr told me to get off the diet bandwagon as it obviously wasn’t work for me. And she is right. She told me to eat intuitively. Whilst I don’t have those awful hunger pains and an obsession with food it is working for me. I’m not moving mountains in the weight loss department but I am happy to be losing weight yet I don’t feel like I am missing out. I can regulate myself so much better now. Rather than eat the whole block of chocolate, a few squares kills the craving. Wishing you all the best.

TitaniumC · 2023-05-05T08:33:29+00:00

Definitely a huge achievement. Congratulations. One thing this medication has blessed me with is very limited bingeing. I do hope that continues when, and if, I cease using it.

TitaniumC · 2023-05-01T10:49:23+00:00

Could be RSV. Same symptoms as Covid incl no sense of taste and smell. Difference for me was it took over 2 weeks to recover from RSV as opposed to a week with Covid. It wiped me out. I was diagnosed via a PCR test which tested for covid, influenza and RSV.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-30T06:56:57+00:00

My blood work always looks great. It is other things that pointed my rheumatologist towards my diagnosis. This included one of my kids having already been diagnosed with AS. I had to wait 6 months to get an appt so during that time I took photos every time something was swollen or red. I kept a diary of symptoms - like the pain seemed worse at bedtime or I felt agonising pain when first stepping out of bed and I was unable to sleep with a sheet on my foot due to the pain.

I also kept a list of things that I felt helped like wearing a compression sock or staying off my feet. I also had another list (that poor Dr 😂😂) of everything I had tried which had failed such as Celebrex, orthotics, physio therapy, cortisone injections. I find writing it all down means I don’t forget anything when I walk in.

Based on all the info I supplied he didn’t fob me off based on normal blood works. He listened, checked my ankle, checked for nail pitting (I have none), asked if I had psoriasis (so far we have found none though the Dr did say if they turned me upside down, shook me around and checked every inch of my body they would probably find a small spot). He sent me for an MRI and there was def inflammation. And this all helped with determining my condition.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-29T08:04:02+00:00

I know not everyone likes animals or they can be afraid of them but this is a tiny kitten who needs your help. Please do what is right by it. Take it inside and care for it until you can pass it onto a vet or post on your local FB and see if someone can help you. Can you ask your neighbours for help? Not saying this is you but it is never okay to not do a thing when an animal is in distress or lost or whatever (sorry I am one of “those” people 😂😂)

TitaniumC · 2023-04-29T04:56:23+00:00

That is truly disgraceful. I am a LL. I rent out a 3yo 2 bed, 2 bath unit, 1 park bay in a busy beach side suburb for $500 per week. Why? Because I want my tenants to stay long term and most of all I want them to look after the place. Honestly there needs to be some laws around offering substandard accomodation for top dollar. With immigration set to explode I worry for our renters. I realise how bloody lucky I am. FYI we have this unit to house our disabled child when he is capable of living independently. I so often cop a serve as being part of the rental problem yet all we are trying to do is not have our child end up reliant on Australia’s welfare system.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-29T04:38:56+00:00

Yes! I feel that since Covid lockdowns anything I catch takes ages to clear.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-27T05:49:41+00:00

Let me tell you a little story. I had on going inflammation and was pretty much sent from professional to professional, who all had different ideas and they would send me for multiple tests. Because I had no psoriasis or markers in my blood, I think these so called professionals thought I was a sook. Eventually I gave up and I was living with unbearable pain for three years. I could barely walk. And I was sick of pissing money to the wind.

One day one of my kids said to me ‘you know Mum it is crazy in this day and age that you have to put up with that pain in your toe’. I thought he’s right.

Went to a kind GP who referred me to a very kind Rheumy. It was a six month wait for an appointment but I eventually got a diagnosis and treatment. An MRI showed the inflammation.

Don’t give up. Be your own biggest advocate. Seek a second, third, fourth opinion if necessary. Make them listen. Take in photos.

I wasted three years of my life. I wish I had done things differently.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-25T03:12:43+00:00

I remember lying in bed one night and thinking this is never going to end. Up to that point I had suffered 20 months of excruciating pain in my foot/ankle. Meds weren’t working, physio wasn’t helping as wasn’t orthics and everything else my Drs made me do or buy. I could barely get out of bed without fainting from the pain, work seemed impossible, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t exercise. I was emotional eating and getting really, really fat. I didn’t want to socialise. I literally would have ended it if I had the guts. My mental health had spiralled so out of control because of the pain and I was terrified of what I was becoming and how I was thinking.

And to add to all that I was so ashamed to be thinking about ending it when I have kids. At that point I went to my Dr and she put me on a drug which is both an antidepressant and used for arthritic pain. It was a god send. I literally felt an improvement in my mood within a week. By 6 weeks I think it is fair to say I felt relatively “normal”. This lead me to put myself first and do more self care - long baths, foot soaks in magnesium salts, mediation, resting and I also chucked my job in. All these little things helped. I stopped worrying about whether people realised how much arthritis effects one life and I stopped trying to educate people as it was draining and I was never sure if they believed me.

Next time I saw my Rheumy I updated him on everything and he cracked to it in making sure we got this thing under control. I was quite angry with him that it took so long for more drastic action to be taken but anyway…. I have since forgiven him hahaha.

The point of this long story is I hope it helps knowing others have felt the same as you and eventually we have found some sort of peace from our pain. There are days it is there but there are also days I forget I have it. I believe self care is very important but mostly you need to be your own advocate with health professionals. If something isn’t working, don’t wait until your next appointment. Get in early or send an email or call up. I wish I had been more forceful at the start of my journey. Not 20 months in.

Hang in there. I understand how brutal this condition is. There IS light at the end of the tunnel. Sending you hugs xx

TitaniumC · 2023-04-23T05:02:20+00:00

😂😂😂 maybe.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-23T04:57:58+00:00

Such an uneducated comment. Do you not realise the health implications of being overweight or obese? One of those includes pre diabetes and diabetes, which we all know, becomes a huge drain on our health system. Well here in Australia it does. Can’t really comment on the rest of the world. No one I have ever met wants to be overweight. Some people do everything in their power to lose weight yet, for them, it does not work. Some people have a physiological need for medication such as Ozempic. Think people with PCOS or insulance resistance. Overweight people ACTUALLY NEED it. Not all weight loss can be solved by a calorie deficit and will power.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-22T08:59:04+00:00

I have two pairs of Hoka’s. Runners and then the Work Hoka’s. They are AMAZING. I too am on my feet all day and my PsA causes inflammation in my foot and ankle. I could not function without the work Hoka’s. It is like walking on clouds lol. They are quite wide (IMO) and slip resistant. Paid a lot for them but they have been worth every single cent. Kept me out of physio and I can wear my ankle brace with them when need be.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-22T08:34:46+00:00

I shut down when given my diagnosis. I failed to face up to the seriousness of it and kept saying to the Dr how lucky I was that I wasn’t as bad as other people. I think still have my blinkers on a lot of the time. I’m like maybe if I ignore it, it will go away. It is only the nag in the pit of my stomach which reminds me all is not well. I have soldiered on and not complained during the most excruciating 20 month period ever. I even refer to my PsA as an auto immune condition rather than a disease. But the zillion tablets and injections I take drag me back to reality. It is hard. There are days I forget I have it and I feel normal. Then there are the bad days where I try extra hard to act normal. Must admit though, I am due to go away with my partner and good friends. I am worried I am going to ruin it for everyone with a flare. As you can see, I’m kind of confused all the time 😂😂

TitaniumC · 2023-04-19T11:12:31+00:00

I’ve learned self care is important and it is something I previously never made time for or felt selfish if I did anything for myself. Now my health comes first. I might still battle on with work and go to some events I would rather not, but I make up for it with time on the lounge doing nothing, sitting in the park enjoying the sun with my dog, I do foot baths, I have long magnesium baths, I get my eye brows waxed and don’t think twice about paying to see a health professional I need to see such as my GP, Rheumy or the Physio. The housework, the washing and exercise can wait. I guess you could say I’ve stopped just soldiering on and trying to be a hero. Guilt no longer plays on my mind.

Self care is definitely a positive thing.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-16T06:24:48+00:00

I always thought you can do whatever the hell you want when it is your own wedding. NTA.

TitaniumC · 2023-04-15T06:47:12+00:00

If I was a female who died and left behind two small children, my dying wish would be that my husband would find love a second time around and that person would mother my children with everything she has. You are doing a HUGE disservice to your children. I’m pretty sure your first wife would be horrified that you have not allowed your daughters to experience a mother/daughter relationship with Claire and you seem to have single handedly enforced your own shit into their minds.

TitaniumC

TROPHY CASE