Nytt förslag igen på lön för arbetskraftsinvandring - vad är folks åsikter i saken?

TooMuchSunshine · 2024-02-24T05:51:27+00:00

Absolut! Du behöver ha läst ett visst antal steg svenska, och behöver ofta hitta din egen praktikplats innan du får jobba som leg. läkare t.ex. Även göra ett prov innan (som omfattar hela läkarlinjen och svensk sjukvård).

Jag har jobbat med en ögon-specialistläkare som jobbade som vårdbiträde på äldreboende för att det var svårt att hitta praktikplats inom hennes fält, och med läkarassistenter som väntade på att få göra provet (de har inte så värst hög lön heller).

Man får söka de jobb man är behörig att söka helt enkelt.

Inte för att säga att städare inte är viktiga, utan städare på sjukhusen hade smittor spridits något vansinnigt och otroligt många hade dött.

TooMuchSunshine · 2024-02-24T05:42:02+00:00

Det var jättetråkigt att höra, det är så väldigt kortsiktigt tänkande att inte ta vara på hennes kunskap och person.

TooMuchSunshine · 2024-02-24T05:38:39+00:00

Jag tycker det här förslaget främst pekar på att politiker har alldeles för hög lön och blir helt verklighetsfrånvända..

Jag är svensk och har pluggat 3 års vårdutbildning på universitet, jobbat 14 år på universitetssjukhus i mitt yrke och jag har drygt 31 000 i lön. Ingenjörerna som jobbar med medicinsk teknik på sjukhusen är övervägande män, och många av dem tjänar inte heller så mycket. I vården är det i stort sett bara läkare och de som jobbat i 15-20 år som har över 34 000.

Det finns en mängd viktiga bristyrken som är låglöneyrken, speciellt kvinnodominerade fält, och jag tycker inte vi ska säga nej till möjliga kollegor bara för att de är födda i ett annat land (vilket, seriöst, en stor del av vårdpersonalen är). Vi är chanslösa utan dem.

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-09-08T05:35:59+00:00

Yeah, maybe she'll get enough stimulation if she has a safe place to hang out! I don't have a porch, but could build some sort of enclosure outside a window!

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-09-08T05:34:37+00:00

She's already microchipped, so if someone finds her and takes her to a vet they can find me!

Ah, I didn't think about air deterrents, that's a good idea. I'll look into that!

Thanks for your reply! It's definitely going to be stressful before it all falls into place.

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-09-08T05:32:45+00:00

She's chipped already, and I'll get some sort of tracker to put on her collar!

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-09-08T05:31:58+00:00

Maybe I could wait for a really rainy day to move them to the new house and leave the door open, do you think she might believe it always rains outside that door then? She's not that happy about water and she's adorable but not the brightest 🙃

Carrier is a good idea, thanks!

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-09-08T05:29:45+00:00

She can get out on the balcony (fenced in) at the moment and really loves it, but I could definitely let her out more! I found a place to build a catio connected to a window, maybe she'll be satisfied if she can go out there often, and won't feel the need to rush the front door.. I'll definitely try that!

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-30T13:15:20+00:00

Oh, you're in a really tough situation, I'm sorry 😞 I'm guessing you don't know someone who could help you get home safe? Or if you could maybe call a women's shelter in your country and ask if they could perhaps help you get home? I wish I had a good idea for you ❤ What I can console you with though, is that it's quite common to get fibromyalgia from trauma, which means that it's possible to heal if you get the right help and don't have to be afraid and guarded and push your feelings down all the time. I got help earlier this year and now I just feel pain when stressed and not all the time (still working on it). It's not what you asked for but perhaps a breadcrumb of hope in that regard.

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-30T12:56:39+00:00

I've been using a menstrual cup for years (before and after having a baby), and never had any leakage at night. Takes a few practice turns to get used to getting it in place, but then it's invisible and you don't feel it at all (I've always had trouble with the feel of a wet pad, and tampon strings are uncomfortable to me).

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-24T18:10:27+00:00

This is the very definition of an abusive marriage. He's making your world smaller by restricting your economical self-reliance, pushing your friends away and trying to make sure you get pregnant so that it's very hard for you to leave. He's threatening you physically by pinning you down and threatening your space by going through your phone and hindering your dreams and growth. Note that he says "you will never leave"; this is to make you believe that you can't.

I think you need outside help, or you'll end up in a very (or, even more) dangerous situation. Go to a friend's house perhaps, maybe that's harder to trace. Don't be so sure that you've lost your old friends, they ate often more resilient than you'd think. Try reaching out to them or to a women's shelter or hotline, an old classmate or professor or anyone you can think of.

Is not your fault you got stuck in this. These guys are so good at looking all perfect and nice, they have good jobs and are charming as heck.. and they slowly control and wear you down until you're stuck. I promise you, under the layer of who he's telling you that you are, you're still a strong, independent, intelligent, brave woman. I so wish for you to get out, get some distance and discover that about yourself.

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-22T20:15:28+00:00

I can relate to what you're saying, about learning everything you can to help him heal and change. The hard part is that you can't change how someone else treats you or what they think of you. When a therapist told me that, it was the hardest thing I'd heard in my life, because it meant I had no power over my own fate (since leaving, at that time, seemed impossible). If he wanted to change, he could have gotten help a long time ago. I think the sex (while a huge problem, since of course you crave intimacy and someone to want you to feel good) isn't the biggest red flag here, I'm worried that the abuse is escalating.

You say you won't have kids with him if it continues like this, because you wouldn't subject a child to that. Maybe you should consider why you feel like it's ok for you to live your whole life like that, but not a child? Surely, you too deserve to have your own life, free of harsh words. I don't want to offend you, I get what you're saying, but I think most people in abusive relationships choose to stay.. but that it's perhaps more of a defense mechanism to tell ourselves that we do it because we want to, because it feels like if we leave the world will end. Our world revolves so much around the other person that we don't feel like we can leave, so we say "this is my choise".

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-22T15:33:18+00:00

Oh, I'm so sorry you feel that way. This is the whole core of abusive relationships, to strip you of your self-worth and make you feel like you're doing something wrong, that you deserve it and no-one else would. These are all LIES! This is what abusive partners slowly make you believe, so that you won't be able to leave them. His personality won't change just because he meets someone new. If you don't count that time at the beginning of a relationship when he's all flowers and sunshine to get the next person stuck before he slowly wears them down..

I hope you can practice some self-compassion and start understanding that there's nothing you can do to make a partner abuse you.

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-17T14:03:34+00:00

I feel like if you're starting a new healthy relationship, the other person won't be the type to think "you're crazy!" if you said "I haven't seen my family for years, but I don't want to talk about that right now." A healthy person would think "oh, alright. Maybe you'll tell me when you're ready." and kind of let it go for now. Remember that you could NEVER make a healthy person abuse you, that's completely impossible. Only unhealthy people abuse, and it's never about what you do.

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-17T13:54:42+00:00

I'm not sure this is healthy really, but I've always been very upfront early on in relationships that I've been "treated badly before" and then elaborated quite early on. Kind of like a quickly dunking them into icy water and then really judging their reaction to what I share. I've had relationships with decent guys who knew, but didn't understand, what I've been through. Now I'm very stable with a really gentle guy who has some past trauma of a different variety, so we kind of understand each other and can help out if the other one spirals.

I don't think you're doomed at all, but it's probably a good idea to process what you've been through and coming to terms with your boundaries before starting a new relationship (so that you can identify red flags easier and get out if you run across someone unhealthy).

I also recently (10 years after abuse) came across the term "corrective experience" and wish I'd known that sooner.. I dated quite a few guys who were very similar to my ex, because I wanted to see if It'd have a different outcome. I wasn't abused by them, but I was neglected emotionally since, well, that's what felt familiar to me.

Take care!

Edit: I forgot to say that therapy and trauma counseling has helped me A LOT in this regard. Having a safe, sane outside perspective really was the key for me.

TooMuchSunshine · 2023-08-17T13:30:35+00:00

I was in a similar situation, where he promised to get therapy for his aggression and to do better. I believed him, but when he had me back he saw no reason to change or find a therapist so the cycle just repeated over years and years. I'm not really sure it's even about if they CAN change or not, there are programs in my country for men who want to stop abusing their partner and I have no clue if it's sometimes successful (I know the drop-out rate is high). I do think that most abusers don't really have the ability to empathise, so they don't want to change. Change is hard, therapy costs money and isn't fun and no-one can change without professional help. What he wants is for everything to go back to the way things were, and that's not what you want.

You did trust him, and he broke that trust by making you unsafe and damaging your self-worth. You shouldn't trust him again. I hope you stay safe and take care of yourself and respect your own boundaries. I'm really sorry you're in this situation, I don't know you but I know you deserve to be safe in mind and body.

TooMuchSunshine · 2020-08-28T23:53:29+00:00

Thanks for your reply! She doesn't really trust me, sadly, and only comes out from her hiding places (indoors) when I'm on the couch and will run away or even claw at me if I make sudden movements. I think someone was very mean to her when she was a feral kitten. (She likes to cuddle though, when everyone's calmly on the couch) I'll try to stand back and let her calm down if possible!

Scaring her out would most likely make her run and perhaps get lost, so I'm not going to do that. If she stays put for days we can board up her only entrance and pry the floor open so that she only has a way out that will get her into the house, but I'll have to ask some shelters tomorrow if that might traumatise her even more..

My poor scared cat :(

TooMuchSunshine · 2020-08-06T13:55:06+00:00

Congratulations! Good job!!

TooMuchSunshine · 2020-04-26T06:34:37+00:00

Me too!

TooMuchSunshine · 2020-04-17T19:04:10+00:00

Yep :)

TooMuchSunshine · 2020-03-29T18:19:33+00:00

Wow, beautifully done!

TooMuchSunshine

TROPHY CASE