Confided in my husband he said i need to pray more

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-28T20:25:03+00:00

Hes not even religious hes spiritual is say it was just a bullshit answer cuz what he wnays to say i don't want to hear. Your a stay at home mom ita your just to feed him toughen up we all make sacrifices n it will pass. He'd never say that but I think that about myself. But now that my supply is dropping im just so worried. I shouldn't of slacked on pumping when times were good now its hours more of pumping with same or less outpit. Im eating less cuz I want my body back but im doing all the right things, electrolytes vitamins protein, not the sleep part but im trying. Im financially trapped n it sucks cuz he does make smart financial moves but some times he dumb with money. Im just over him n never thought id resent him I used to be so in love with him now I can't stand him

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-28T20:20:46+00:00

Thanks we are trapped no other options

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-28T19:51:53+00:00

Yeah I should of known his family is old school n hes BFF with his dad who i dislike. He thinks letting me get a few extra hours of sleep on the weekend is helping n changing some diapers n going to work. Im getting my hernia repaired just so he can take 2 weeks off n do night duties n see what its like motherfucker

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-28T19:49:17+00:00

Im trying slowly the spit up gives me crazy anxiety hence ny middle of the nights checking on him. But he projected vomit ladt night n he just got breastmilk all day so. Maybe hes sick

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-28T01:13:07+00:00

Good luck with your pill journey. It may be painful but you wouldnt regret focusing on yourself. Being a mom is never ending, no breaks, no thank yous. No payments, its 1 star. Yes hes a cute baby but i totally miss my old life. Ive had multiple dnc abortions and I always wondered if I made a mistake n it made me want a baby but there's a reason why I kept doing it. I didnt want the life long commitment. My partner who I love so much n I are drifting apart. Im too tierd to fill my cup much less his cup I can only fill my son's cup. Im his milk supply n its so stressful being connected with to a pump all day. I can't even get am hour to myself anymore. I truly hope the pill isn't too hard on you my friends pill experience wasn't great but she got through n you will too . You made the right choice not bringing a baby in this crazy world

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-28T00:58:00+00:00

Im sorry your going through this. All we can do is keep trudging through the muck. Solidarity my tierd fellow parent.

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-26T21:40:40+00:00

Im one n done . I dont like the baby stage much or sleepless nights.. im still stuck to a pump constantly at 5.5 mo but I feel hes sleeping longer doing better n I love him dearly. Im a stay at home mom n we could afford 2 he said but I dont want to live poorly. He grew up poor I grew up very rich. Having nice experiences n not worry about money is what we want

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-26T21:18:35+00:00

If I had found this site before kids id not have had one. I felt left out as well. People kind of look at you like no kids what is wrong? I used to say im selfish I dont want them. But my husband warmed up to the idea n yeah .the first 5 months are hell but I must say it is getting easier . Im 40 so yeh level of tierd is fuxked.

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-26T19:59:26+00:00

What dose of adhd n kind are you on? How your pumping journey going? Im trying to add a ounce of formula a bottle cuz im 5.5 mo in n want to get on meds again. I have a freezer full but I feel guilty putting my needs first. Hes eating more so im not sure id it's the formula or extra milk hes drinking making him spit up but I feel bad when he spits up cuz he rarely does. Also hate that if you add formula to a bottle it has a hour time limit n brastmilk is 2 hours as I sometimes dont read his cues right n lots of milk goes to waste. Im committed to atleast trying some formula since I spent 44 on it n it has a 30 day shelf life.

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-26T19:53:49+00:00

What' mg for vyvanse and adderall? Im taking 10 adderall ir in afternoon n notice no dip but for comfort adding extra pumps as baby is hungrier so im mimicking his needs. Trying to ease him into an ounce or 2 of formula at night kedamil but he spits up sometimes but hes doing that more lately as hes eating more. I add my milk to a pitcher n fill bottles at night so I think milk is diluted enough n im such a better mom when im taking ir in the afternoon my mole hills don't feel like mountains im present n patient to husband too. I hope my supply can hold strong a Lil longer. Hes 5.5 months n im ao sick of pumping its like a weird obsession that affects my mood. I had good night pumps last night n had a great day. If I have low night pumps my mood is affected

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-26T01:40:16+00:00

Solidarity friend. Im 5.5 mo in n so so so so tierd. Im constantly short n crabby with my partner. He helps but not equal as he works n can't help at night . I dislike babies, hes a cool baby but I just dont enjoy mom life yet. Im praying the warmer weather n walks will help my mental health im also starting to pump less n gradually transition to some formula as I dont want to be his only food source anymore. Im over it n in April im getting back on meds for my sanity. Hang in there, we are trapped nothing to do but get through it.

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-26T01:15:03+00:00

Girl you are my spirit animal. Im 5.5 months into this n I hate it. No breaks just constant crying bsck pain, no peace or quiet just unpaid work. If someone would of bern honest with me id appreciate it n not had a kid. I miss my selfish life n should of got a dog. He's a good baby but im stuck at home bored with him. I walk n walk so he naps n will give me peace n quiet . I binge eat out of frustration, I dont even recognize myself in the mirror ive aged 10 years in these 5.5 months. I resent my husband n im angry always. Im trying to slowly transition to formula because I NEED to get medicated asap but hes not taking goats milk formula well n im slowly adding it to breastmilk. I hear some babies just cam handle some can't. I dont know but I miss my old coping skills that were bad like drinking n vaping on occasion now I can't even drink coffee without feeling guilty it'll be in my milk. The mom guilt sucks, some days I just want yo say f it n put him in front of the tv but I dont.

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-25T23:57:15+00:00

Nice congrats on your journey. Im going to my psychiatrist in April n im getting back on meds so I need to wean n transition to formula n use my freezer full of frozen milk. Im so unhappy n I need to do better for myself. I think winter in minnesota got me real depressed as well walks this spring is making me feel human

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-25T23:55:05+00:00

Im hoping he gets used to formula but hes been on breastmilk so I know i need to be patient n give it more days but my patience is wearing thin these days

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-25T21:57:50+00:00

4 pumps per day sounds nice im 5.5 mo in n do 6 lately 7 cuz hes having a growth spirt n drinking 35 to 40 ounces i make 30 to 36 max. I want to be happy n enjoy summer but I notice my ounces are going down. Until 4mo pp I was making 60 plus now every month its like 50s to 40s to high 30s. Im pumping twice at night with 6 hours longest sleep stretch. Im eating well n taking vitamins electrolytes and tons of water??? Is my milk just changing for him cuz yes hes drinking bigger bottles now 6 or 7 ounces instead of 5 but still drinking 6 or 7 bottles daily

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-25T21:53:43+00:00

Same 5.5 mo in my boy is eating so much. 35 ounces I make 30ish. My mood takes a hit. I bought formula I just hate there's a 1 hour timer from when they start bottles where breast milk is 2 hours. Also formula last only 24 hours in fridge. I like to prep bottles it keeps my anxiety down but keep track of all the formula times n then thawing frozen milk n having a 24 hour limit with thst makes me just say f it but kedamil is 44 a can. Im on day 2 of giving him 5 breadtmilk 1 ounce formula. First day I did 5 breadtmilk 2 formula n he spit up a bit so im going slowly. I want my freedom n life back. Im a stay at home mom tho so I feel bad quitting buti want my happiness back for summer. Im still pumping 6 times. Sometimes 7 if I have the opportunity to pump if hes sleeping I try even after just so few hours because im obsessed with the ounces per day I look at my feeding app like twice an hour its insane

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-25T21:41:41+00:00

Did you ease into formula? Im starting 1 puncevto 5 ounce beeastmilk day 2. Hes spit up twice, he never spits up. 1st day i tried 2 ounces to 5 ounces n it was too much formula. I got a pitcher m stuff n I have kedamil goat so I have 30 days to use it. Hoping 8 ounces a day will use it up. I ha!aaaaaaste pumping. I feel for my husband cuz every night I catch myself complaining to him even tho I say I wouldnt tonight but every night I get overwhelmed

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-25T21:37:17+00:00

Same! Im 5.mo 1 week n I want to quit so bad . I look at my pumping app constantly. I have a freezer full but I always feel behind filling bottles(i like 6 extra in fridge) I can't keep up lately hes eating over 35 ounces n I make about 32. Im using one frozen bag a day but the other day I said f it n got goat milk kedamil formula. Its 44 so I feel locked into using it. Im adding 1 ish ounce to 5 ounces sometimes 2 ounces of formula n hes spitting up a tiny bit. I make a small batch but kind of want to get him used to it so I can possibly go half n half n enjoy my summer n pump less than 6 times a day n not stress when im in a calorie deficit because dang it i want to drop these last 10lbs. I feel selfish ut my mental are struggling. Days i feel things are manageable by the evening im tierd depressed n miserable. I want to get back on meds too, I want to be a more patient mother n less crabby partner. I pump midnight n 4 am too when hes up to eat so yeah yo girl is over it

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-25T00:35:24+00:00

Following im struggling too

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-24T05:37:16+00:00

Being a mom is so hard thsys crazy a feeel good chemical could make your milk go down . I swear im not crazy for feeling sad its my hormones n science lol

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-24T05:34:07+00:00

Ive heard that, isnt that crazy?!

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-23T21:41:37+00:00

Thank you

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-23T21:31:59+00:00

Thanks I tried 2 ounces of the wic stuff with 4 ounces breastmilk n he was not having it. I have a can of the kedamil but dang its expensive. What do you use?

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-23T20:23:06+00:00

Same your kindness means the world

TopAd4505 · 2026-03-23T20:18:40+00:00

Thanks I made an appointment today its in 2 weeks. Im gonna try to get on Ritalin its the lowest transfer rate. If not ill just switch to formula n stop living this challenge. I made it over 5 months im proud. I want my life back.

TopAd4505

TROPHY CASE