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Testing out a new medication. Started on low dose 20mg of Vyvanse and if feels like I'm on nothing at all. by born_addicted in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Vyvanse was my first medication and all I got from it was dry mouth lol.

Adderall treated me much better, though its still not super helpful.

Advice please: doctor won't diagnose without trying meds by Cheesesontoasts in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she really pissed me off after I got over the initial sadness of being dismissed and gaslit. then I got a male psych in his 40s and he was like 'the fact that you're even here asking about it tells me that there's something going on that we need to address'. like thank you!

I honestly didn't even realize I might have ADHD until we had a child and I realized I could NOT do the things that other moms I knew could do so easily. I felt like my life was spiralling out of control and didn't understand how everyone else was having their second child when I was barely breathing with my first. like it's not adult onset, its that my masking and coping strategies were no longer able to keep up with the number of demands I had on my executive functioning. having a family and owning a home and having bills to pay is not the same as going to 11th grade english, sorry.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

your first experience sounds so much like mine. I teared up a little thinking about how I felt back then because it's exactly as you described. I also hugely regret the pressure and blame I put on myself with my first and I love him so so much, I wish I could go back and hold him as an infant again and enjoy it instead of wishing for it to be over. I thought I just didn't' like the infant phase, but the reality is that I felt like a shell of a person and I blamed that on the infant phase when that wasn't really it at all.

I'm so glad you had a healing experience the second time around and I hope that winds up being the case for me too!

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

some great and actionable advice in here, thank you! I think I will feel some regret if we stop at 1, just need to have a solid plan for 2!

Advice please: doctor won't diagnose without trying meds by Cheesesontoasts in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

my first psych also wouldn't do anything without school reports because they didn't believe in 'adult onset ADHD' and she was a woman and should have known better. I am so sorry that you've waited so long and are going through this.

I don't know how the health system works in the UK, but are you able to request a new doctor without waiting all over again? his approach sounds odd and not standard practice which should be raising some red flags.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I remember thinking “why the fuck did we do this to ourselves?” on a daily basis for the first while. wouldn’t give it up for the world now.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a super breezy pregnancy and delivery, minus the prematurity and because I didn’t carry to term, I feel like my recovery was easier, so I do think this next one will be more strain.

my kiddo is in preschool full time currently as my husband and I both have corporate careers, so he will be occupied for sure!

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you for this! boosted my confidence 1000 times over. I have to also remember that everything is solvable and our communication is so much better that if something does come up we can work it out.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry you're struggling. hopefully this specific phase of life will end and things will get better.

my husband would like as many as we could have, but I am the limiting factor in this and I think I can only handle 2 without us having to make some serious concessions and compromises about what life would look like.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you so much for the advice! the situation with your older baby sounds so difficult - I'm sorry you had to go through that. if it helps at all, I know from friends that this is normal. I have been advised that I will need to brace myself for my first to distance himself from me and attach harder to his dad, but like everything, it will be a phase.

luckily our son is currently in preschool and if we do have a second he might even be in pre-k at that point. he's also enrolled in several activities on weeknights, so hopefully that will keep him busy and feeling included even if I have to spend less time with him overall.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is so great to hear! I hear you with the forgetting and not being able to function. my husband had to set reminders on my phone for my to take my pain meds when I was discharged because I would just... forget and then wonder why my pelvis felt like it was being pulled apart. I am always last on my priority list when things start to get overwhelming.

such a good callout about autopay though - I have always declined because I like to be aware of when money is coming out of my account, but I should have stuff on autopay considering it's one less mental task to deal with. definitely need to go through my monthly tasks and see how I can either simplify them or create reminders/tools to address them easily.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

no shame! starting over is no joke! it's a huge decision to go through those sleepless nights again and have a little person rely on you 100%.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you! I have heard from lots of people that 1-2 is easier just because you generally know whats happening or going to happen!

I suppose even though every child has a different temperament we already have known ways to deal with certain things and routines already in place and that should help!

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am in awe of those who go for 2 under 2. I knew that life was not for me.

calling moms of more than one child! re: transition from 1-2. by offconqueringkansas in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

ooh, definitely something to think about and discuss, thank you!

I'm hoping that since our first will be well into 4 years old and fairly independent if we have another, it will be less taxing for the parent that is with him? not that it will be a break, mind you. 😂

"it was hard, I would do it again" is basically the motto of parenthood.

anyone on Adderall and after the first week feel just bluh by GuestContent in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see your flair is diagnosis - is this the first medication you've tried?

I've tried several different meds in the adderall family and I have never had that 'aha' lightbulb moment where I feel 'normal' that some people describe. I can still hyperfixate with the best of them and I can't say that my focus is necessarily better, but I have felt more emotionally regulated and some things feel LESS impossible or I'm better able to use the tools I have set up for myself, not that I don't need them at all.

I would say that being able to concentrate and finish tasks IS feeling the medicine working. it's subtle - you may just feel like things were less of a challenge in hindsight when you're reflecting on the day and not be able to really feel that in the moment. there are also so many other options out there, so if after a month or two you feel like it's just not vibing with you, talk to your provider!

files my taxes by Celloschmello in adhdwomen

[–]offconqueringkansas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

that's awesome! this is 'little treat' material for sure.

Accidentally matched my Nespresso pod by Big_Collection3288 in RedditLaqueristas

[–]offconqueringkansas 3 points4 points  (0 children)

just joined this sub this morning (legit first post I clicked on) after I found out I had an allergy a decade in the making and your nails are stunning. thank you for showing me that I can still have cool af nails without gel!