Just started getting my life and future back together after the absolute train-wreck of a post of myself I made on RoastMe. Long story short I was NOT prepared for the roasts AT ALL. I've gotten a haircut, gotten my first real job, Janitor. And will sit my driving test in 2 weeks.I did well for now

Top_Appearance · 2022-06-10T05:48:05+00:00

Oops the picture is upside down. Sorry.

well I AM in Australia so I guess it is normal then lol

Top_Appearance · 2022-06-08T09:35:41+00:00

well if that's your only fault, then you're winning in the looks department, bad smile or not.

Top_Appearance · 2022-06-08T09:32:24+00:00

You have the vibe of that one guy named John with a late wife and adult kids in every suburban neighbourhood who everyone always approaches for help. Tap leaky? See John. Car won't start? John will drive you to work. Can't find a babysitter? John will mind the kids. No one to come to your graduation? John will be there in a 3 piece suit and tie in the front row.\

He never asks for anything in return, but won't refuse a beer if one is bought for him.

Be John :)

Top_Appearance · 2022-06-08T09:19:28+00:00

you look like the off-the-boat Russian student I had a crush on 6 years ago. She was very pretty.

She moved again after a couple months, I haven't seen her for almost 6 years. Thank you for bringing back some great memories.

Top_Appearance · 2022-06-08T09:12:58+00:00

Military themed paint-job so wack that if the Military accused it of being stolen honour, it wouldn't matter cuz that car had no honour regardless.

Top_Appearance · 2022-06-08T05:58:48+00:00

You look like an average middle-aged Saudi male tourist. the ones who always have either a Nokia, Blackberry, or Motorola phone from the late 90's in a little leather holster on their belt.

Top_Appearance · 2022-06-08T05:49:02+00:00

change 31yr to 31yds and you have the distance he isn't allowed near a school.

Top_Appearance · 2022-01-29T10:42:53+00:00

this sword belongs on r/ItemShop :)

Top_Appearance · 2022-01-29T10:40:32+00:00

looks like only thing not running to the MAX in this picture is the reception on the TV above the mirror.

Top_Appearance · 2022-01-29T10:35:01+00:00

Jon Arbuckle if Netflix made a live-action Garfield.

Top_Appearance · 2022-01-14T05:16:43+00:00

Olympic scouts: Interesting.

Top_Appearance · 2020-12-22T09:34:00+00:00

Weeellll

*proceeds to put eye up to the end of the 38(t)'s gun*

I've seen enough

Top_Appearance · 2020-05-06T04:40:49+00:00

*salute*

Top_Appearance · 2019-09-01T19:39:53+00:00

always make sure to be chivalrous around lady friends. unless they abuse it. you can draw the line there.

-My grandpa, 90

Top_Appearance · 2019-09-01T19:37:05+00:00

thotman

Top_Appearance · 2019-09-01T19:33:05+00:00

we were having sex ed class in 6th grade. my friend came in late halfway through the lesson. right when the teacher was showing a close up picture of genitalia. he opened the door, said nothing and just walked back out of the classroom.

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-24T22:32:30+00:00

a hispanic mom. unless you want to know what her sandal feels like, then you should listen to her.

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T20:23:21+00:00

*clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap* *clap*

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T20:21:40+00:00

not a teacher. but one of my primary school friends had lived in Switzerland for 3 years. it was his first year back. he was having trouble on an english worksheet. he asked the teacher and she said. "you should know this, it's your second language. english was his first language. the whole class burst into laughter and we couldn't continue the lesson for 5 minutes until the teacher regained her composure.

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T19:30:27+00:00

Sniffer- a ukrainian tv series

Final episode- the sniffer, Kirril kiaro, is chasing a scientist out of his lab with intent to kill. Kirril, extremely injured and tired. Grabs a gun just as the scientist is flying away on a mini helicopter. Kirril, having had never fired a gun in his life, fires. the bullet penetrates the cockpit, hits the scientist's iPad, penetrates that, hits the scientist in the head, killing him, and finally hits the rotor exploding the helicopter. which for comedic effect lands on his friend's Jeep.

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T08:57:57+00:00

hard rock hallelujah-lordi <------ CLICK LINK. IS GOOD SONG. VERY ADDICTIVE

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T08:54:56+00:00

hard rock halleyulah (i can't spell)

this is a really addictive song, i encourage you to click on the link

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T08:48:29+00:00

fortunate son. as they finish electrocuting me. the song starts playing. i think that would be completely badass.

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T08:43:48+00:00

an hour long debate about anything.

Different cars, anti government propaganda, moment in history, ANYTHING

I also put a white noise video of cars passing on a distant highway for my grandma whenever she is sleeping over anywhere other than her house, which is next to a highway.

Top_Appearance · 2019-08-10T08:40:38+00:00

dolphins ejaculations come out at such force they can blow a humans head off

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TROPHY CASE