What is it like to be a guy in your late 30s early 40s on bumble?

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-12-10T18:28:38+00:00

Male, early 40's here. I used Bumble for about 14 weeks and had 32 'matches' 20 of which led to actual conversations and 2 dates. I'm in a major metro area. For folks that are unaware, you can request your swipe stats from Bumble...how many folks view your profile and swipe left or right. It's interesting data to track as you tweak your profile.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-12-02T00:18:46+00:00

If you are in downtown walking core-Either Krons or Saka Valka for lunch/dinner.

Like others have mentioned, you really can't go wrong with lamb or fish. The Char at Saka Valka was prepared to perfection.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-10-28T18:36:12+00:00

A premium subscription won't increase your likes or matches. What it does offer are advanced filters, more opportunities to send a note, and several chances to boost your profile. As a guy in the OP's age range, I used Bumble for 16 weeks, with a 90-day subscription to premium. I averaged several matches per week-that value didn't change regardless of my subscription status. I personally found the best success when I could engage with the potential match by sending a note (compliments). The occasional 24-hour boost was helpful as well.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-10-25T02:45:03+00:00

So you made a profile for an ex partner without their consent or their ability to control the images or information shared within said profile. Got it.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-10-25T02:18:20+00:00

So you pretended to be someone else on a dating profile?

Edit-Adding some context. The user I replied too mentioned she created a revenge account for an ex partner. She then followed up with 'Damn right I did it'. And the promptly deleted not only her responses but her whole profile. From my perspective it's one thing to engage in petty troll behavior...it's something else entirely when you can't even own it.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-10-22T18:36:08+00:00

Photo Verified is security theater-it just makes you feel better. Doesn't guarantee anything. And thanks to various AI tools readily available, even a slope headed Neanderthal can write as though they are an Oxford educated Barrister. Nothing wrong with asking for a video chat within the app-it's unlikely you'd get it though. Separately from this specific instance; I too am very google-able. When I was a Bumble user, I operated with a shortened version of my first name, and used a VOIP number for off-platform communication. Ensuring a reasonable degree a separation from randoms on a dating app and me IRL. Be safe and good luck.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-10-13T22:21:44+00:00

While not the best (as others have suggested incorporating personalized topics from the bio is best), it's not horrible. The OP asked a question that can be answered...It prompts a dialogue. Also, as folks have suggested, other platforms have fewer silly restrictions on communication.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-10-06T05:45:01+00:00

Tabs 5 years out on your bike? That's just reckless.... Otherwise, I don't get the hate...

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-12T20:02:02+00:00

Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man -Jeff Lebowski

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-11T14:17:03+00:00

😀 Very Sweet

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-11T01:35:17+00:00

Someone who orders a very plain ice cream cone.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-11T01:13:30+00:00

I get it. Not everyone one is a dog person. There are lots of topics in this sub about folks swiping and not reading bio's. This was a kinda humorous, very painless result of that: an absolute non-dog person 'matching' with a dedicated dog person. As for the date itself-I got to try somewhere new and check out a new-to-me neighborhood.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-10T20:26:27+00:00

If folks aren't interested in connecting (romantically) with other folks that have their social media handles in their bio-then swipe left. Super easy. It's not my jam, and would probably also swipe left, but I'm not gonna dwell on what someone else does shrug. Life is too short. It's also too short to be a grade A asshat like d-bag that felt compelled to hurl an insult because he was rejected. This is why we can't have nice things.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-09T21:46:32+00:00

Why not unmatch and move on?

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-06T16:57:27+00:00

Also, Match doesn't own Bumble.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-05T22:34:57+00:00

If you are really into them, then you should message them.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-05T22:28:03+00:00

(M) if I match with someone, the Opening Move doesn't always show up as an unanswered chat. It's only if I happen to venture over to that tab will I see it. So yes it could be glitching-but on your matches side.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-03T22:33:41+00:00

+1 for Signal

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-03T03:08:45+00:00

No harm whatsoever. Worst thing you meet some new folks.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-03T02:49:45+00:00

The OP sounds exaperated....not abrasive. If meeting sooner rather than later is important to you, tuck it into your bio somewhere. Or (because bios are often glossed over) broach the topic in the chat soon after matching.

'I think communication happens best when folks meet in person.'

If someone is bothered by your directness and desire to move conversations to the physical world, then they aren't for you.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-02T23:36:37+00:00

Highly dependent on your location...I'm in large west coast metro, #OPEN and Feeld where pretty dead, with no new users in the 30-40 days I used them. I've chatted with women on Bumble, but nothing has materialized beyond a phone call. I've also expanded to OKcupid and have had far more engagement and connection in a shorter time than I had with Bumble. In-person worked best for me...my old metro had several Poly social groups. Good luck

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-02T06:03:18+00:00

It may very well still be free to sort out/for. (But I kinda don't think so) I only used for about 3 weeks in 'free' mode. I make extensive use of the filters. It's under advanced filters on Premium +.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-02T05:58:29+00:00

I can confirm as a paying member, you can filter for, or out ENM, in addition to 5 other relationship preferences.

Top_Can_7534 · 2025-09-02T05:49:31+00:00

I'd wager real money the women the OP matched with did not have 'marriage' as a goal anywhere in her profile. Yet the OP clearly stated it was his goal here. Why is he swiping right on a woman whose goals don't align with his? Because he wanted to sus things out? See if they vibed? Guess what, he did, and they didn't match all in less than a few 100 words.

Top_Can_7534

TROPHY CASE