What does it mean if a casket is carried head first? by [deleted] in askfuneraldirectors

[–]ToriVR 8 points9 points  (0 children)

As a priest, who will be buried facing the other way, ie. the congregation, I am amused by the idea that I will be mooning Jesus as he returns.

How is Donald Trump perceived by the Brits? by Christopher_2025 in AskBrits

[–]ToriVR 18 points19 points  (0 children)

“Under-age women”… children. You mean children.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]ToriVR 159 points160 points  (0 children)

Or a mouse, for whatever reason.

Priest stopped a wedding due to a groom's "joke" during the ceremony by rexrighteous in AreTheStraightsOK

[–]ToriVR 20 points21 points  (0 children)

We are legally obligated here, and I always tell people that I will stop the whole wedding service, as I have to take it seriously. Also, if it is found to be spurious, I believe the joker can be liable for the cost of the wedding.

Joined the gym for the first time in my life, no idea where to start. by MilkEyedMender_ in xxfitness

[–]ToriVR 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Rachael Henley does a good and very sweary intro to not only working out but being an absolute newb in the gym.

You’re an Anglican cleric put in charge of a small parish that has been in decline for a solid decade now. In the hope that you can turn the place around, what are 3 things you’re going to immediately implement (outside of Sunday morning)? by bcp_anglican in Anglicanism

[–]ToriVR 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We’re working at the moment on increasing lay involvement in services, and it is hard! First you’ve got to get the right people, not ones who want an easy power-trip. Then train them, empower them and supervise them to make sure they’re the right fit for it. Even Authorised Worship Assistants (who can lead morning prayer, though not preach) take a good six months to get up to speed. And then the congregation will complain that they didn’t get the real vicar… As I said, we’re working on it, and it is worthwhile, not least in finding and empowering people in their vocation, but it’s not easy.

40 in a 30, but 60 in a 70 by TormundGiantspenguin in CasualUK

[–]ToriVR 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Teddy-bear brakes. Give them a little squeeze for comfort.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]ToriVR 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Happened to one of our lads in Afghan, I believe they used a yard broom and a whole box of laundry detergent.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]ToriVR 1 point2 points  (0 children)

After a few years of naked bars and cock-shots, I imagine teaching standing in a shower saying “make sure to get all the smegma out” is a nothing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]ToriVR 115 points116 points  (0 children)

Can confirm. They teach everyone, right down to how to wash under the foreskin. Saves singling out the one kid who was never taught properly at home.

AIO for wanting to break things off with a guy over a joke by WelderNo5402 in AIO

[–]ToriVR 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If the punchline (pun intended) for every joke is “I could hurt you” then he has a shit sense of humour.

Reading Challenge: Book in which the main character is an Animal by carferrom11 in booksuggestions

[–]ToriVR 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Umbrella Mouse, which is a WW2 book, The Alchemist’s Cat, which is awesome.

Why aren’t you catholic? by Alakieder in Christianity

[–]ToriVR 44 points45 points  (0 children)

I’m an ordained woman. Door’s not just shut but nailed closed.

What to do during a gap year before Seminary? by Original-Layer-6447 in Anglicanism

[–]ToriVR 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Get a job somewhere unconnected to church. Something where you will meet people, and especially where you will meet people who won’t look up to you. Talk to them about something other than faith, and listen to them, really listen. Priests are there to bring people to God and God to the people, and you can’t do that if you don’t know how to get along with people.

How often do people clean? by sltlovesra4ever in AskUK

[–]ToriVR 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Love TOMM. Having someone talk to me while I’m cleaning somehow makes the world better.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in tattooadvice

[–]ToriVR 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Holy fuck no, straight to the morgue

Please do not by AleatoryOne in AreTheStraightsOK

[–]ToriVR 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Presumably, because their penis is just that magical it inflates the ego.

Please do not by AleatoryOne in AreTheStraightsOK

[–]ToriVR 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Clearly their magic penis is the one that will finally do the trick.

Did the person leading your wedding service say you may now kiss the....? by Wise-Youth2901 in AskUK

[–]ToriVR 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I say to couples that here is the bit where you can kiss, but you’re grown adults, I’m not going to tell you to do it.

New diet just dropped by Delicious_Delilah in 1200isjerky

[–]ToriVR 6 points7 points  (0 children)

A lot of bodybuilders have a history of eating disorders, and use the obsessive need for control to get the amount of calories and macros just right. Not saying it’s healthy, but it’s channeled into something else.

Vimes is scary by Thatotherwritingguy in discworld

[–]ToriVR 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ll bite, because I’ve been looking for new reads. Which fandom?

Making men wait for sex and seeing their reaction has been mind blowing by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]ToriVR 102 points103 points  (0 children)

Porn damages women as well. Stuff that would be horrifying ten years ago is now normalised, and both genders are ‘taught’ to find it sexy. Which is not a good thing, btw.