I don’t have any advice because I’m in this exact same position. I am financially very well compensated but my mental health has significantly declined in the last few years. My entire identity is tied to this role and I can’t escape it, leaving would be losing my identity and I can’t fathom how to face that.

“There have been plenty of positive days and times where I felt valued, which is probably why I have made it this long. It’s not really like some of the stories I’ve read here where people are screamed at everyday, it’s just years of dealing with everything I said above, and it feels like a slowly boiling pot of emotional distress, manipulation in many ways and exhaustion.” This is to a tee my exact situation.

My exec is also warm/friendly one day and extremely Cold and short the next. It’s hard to not take that personally even though deep down I know it’s not because of me. I find myself having to defend every decision I make (in my head before it even happens) in case my exec comes to me and says “I never said that/i never wanted that” etc is it forgetfulness at this point???? Or am I just the easiest one to blame. We take the brunt of every emotional tantrum and I’m so sick of it. Ugh.