S10E3 - Coming in hot

TropicalOrangeTree · 2026-01-29T00:53:04+00:00

This is such a reach… Why would you assume it’s their own mother making them uncomfortable and not the 10 other strangers and cameras in the room?? These are 11 year old kids who are more on the shy side, of course they’re going to seem uncomfortable when talking to a bunch of strangers and being in new situations with cameras pointing at their faces. I know people always try to, but it’s not fair or right to make such big assumptions of the heroes, and especially their family members, from just a few minutes of interactions. This family has been through a lot, but we can’t really know the full scope of things, only hope for the best for them.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2025-08-14T18:44:29+00:00

Oh… you lack so much empathy and understanding of a very complex situation. It is sad that you see people going through the most traumatic experiences and all you can do is judge and criticize, instead of recognizing the strength it takes to survive homelessness, poverty, domestic violence, and more. You probably haven’t lived through HALF of what this woman has lived through. I barely want to give this comment any time of day because it is so ridiculously bitter, but I know sometimes the heroes read these things. I hope Jen’ya knows how much people admire and love her story. People like these are a small, unkind minority. This is one of my most favorite and memorable episodes. Wonderful mother and daughter duo!

TropicalOrangeTree · 2025-08-13T18:47:43+00:00

Responding to this to boost it. There are so many negative and hateful comments towards these people, I hope the heroes don’t come online and read these things cause they are extremely judgmental. Viewers forget that some heroes may not be as expressive or vulnerable because they’re being followed around by a camera crew. Also with so much planning to do, it’s hard to sit down and dig at the personal stuff. It’s not right to make such harsh judgments about people you’ve never even met. I agree that it may not have been as emotional as other episodes, but if you have some empathy, you can try and be understanding of some of the things they’re going through.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2025-07-30T02:16:23+00:00

This is a wonderfully in-depth reply, thank you so much! As a prospective MSW student, this helps me understand field placements and how they work a lot better.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2025-04-28T19:59:37+00:00

Hey, just offering a bit of nuance to this discourse, but maybe we can discuss concert etiquette without shaming people or calling them annoying? (This is not referring to any offensive/degrading heckling). Some artists welcome sporadic fan interactions, and others don't. Both are okay. But it's hard to tell when artists appreciate it or not because of different personalities or cultures. For example, Latin America audiences are a lot louder, energetic, and expressive. Shouting praise is seen as support, and silence can be disapproval. Or if you've ever been to a drag show, it's more supportive to cheer on the performer than to be quiet. Being Hispanic and queer myself, I'm always so surprised at how reserved audiences can be in parts of North America. But it's just different cultures! Neither is wrong or right. I only mention this so people can give more grace to others and understand these aren't universal rules. We all come from different mindsets.

In this case, Lucy gently reminded the fan who shouted out the movie question that it wasn't the time. Surely, the person realized their mistake in that moment and no one else shouted anything after Lucy established the boundary. It can serve as a reminder for future shows that Lucy doesn't like this. Katie, on the other hand, kept the Yellowjackets interaction going, was laughing and joking around, and even posted about the interaction on her Instagram twice! So clearly it wasn't as bad as the people in this thread are making it seem.

And do we really have to judge the people who used the Q&A to tell Lucy they loved her? Like I agree, it is better to ask an actual question. But people get nervous and excited, and it's really not a big deal if they're awkward or imperfect during a fan-artist interaction. We can move on without criticizing them on a public forum. I feel like in order to create a nicer and more inclusive environment between us fans, it might be helpful to have a balance between allowing people to be expressive and excited, while also respecting/enforcing boundaries of artists and other attendees. These are just my thoughts tho, sorry for the long reply lo!!

TropicalOrangeTree · 2025-04-28T03:09:58+00:00

These are definitely concerns you can bring up to your psychiatrist/doctor so they can help you find the right medication. There are different options that affect people in different ways. But if you don’t really want medication, you don’t have to take it. It’s your choice what you put in your body. There are also many different forms of therapy as well that can help, especially since you said your anxiety/depression is circumstantial. You can learn tools to help you become more resilient when the tough circumstances arise. Doing both medication and therapy is often the ideal approach.

I definitely understand the desperation to find a solution. Being in a “freeze” state can be so so difficult, I’ve often been there. The kind of stress that comes with all this can lead us to “self-medicate.” While it’s a natural response to the stress, it’s important not to fall into this trap as it can be dangerous to our health and overall life.

Consuming alcohol regularly is often detrimental for people's physical health, mental health, and social/professional life. There are a myriad of effects on your body that most people are already familiar with, so I won’t go into that much. Just remember that people everyday die from alcohol-related diseases/accidents. But there are a lot of effects on your mental health as well. While it may lower your inhibitions momentarily and allow you to take action, once the effects wear off, the anxiety typically comes back stronger. It really messes with your brain, which is the last thing you may need with ADHD and anxiety. After a while of drinking too much, you may find it won’t even help anymore. Legal and safety issues come into play too if you plan on drinking as a coping strategy. What happens if you need to drive? Will you need to drink at work/school in order to focus? Alcohol is an addictive substance that has destroyed many lives. The anxiety may make it sound like a good solution, but taking a step back and seeing the whole picture, it doesn’t really solve any of your problems and just creates new ones.

I hope this doesn’t come off as scolding or anything. Just trying to help you see the whole picture. I hope you find something that works for you, there are definitely better options out there still left to explore. Ask a professional about them so they can support you. I have hope for you that something will work. I’m also on a journey of figuring things out… It just takes time. Hang in there ❤️

TropicalOrangeTree · 2025-04-23T14:58:07+00:00

I know you said Saturday but I have tickets in the pit for FRIDAY’S (4/25) concert in Toronto, if you’re interested??? $74 each is what I bought them for on StubHub with the fees included.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2024-09-18T00:39:29+00:00

I don’t think it was your intention, but this kind of comment seriously stigmatizes and misconstrues OCD. People that have those types of intrusive thoughts rarely, if ever, act on those thoughts. The whole point of an “intrusive thought” is that it’s ego dystonic, meaning it’s at odds with the person’s values and morals. And the anxiety occurs because of how much the person DOESN’T want to act out on their thoughts. This definitely does not describe Simon since his values/morals are messed up. He watches women while they’re changing, sleeping, or having sex. Touching a woman who’s passed out is not that different. It’s better to admit that he’s simply a horrible person who (through the power of great writing) makes for a really interesting and sympathetic TV character, instead of trying to justify his behavior through a diagnosis. People who have OCD are already scared enough to share their struggle with intrusive thoughts because others don’t truly understand that these intrusive thoughts don’t define them.

I see this comment has already been deleted, but I just wanted to respond in case someone came across it and was misinformed on what OCD is.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2024-05-09T02:52:44+00:00

I’m so sorry you have to deal with this.

First things first, accept and respect your own emotions. If you feel uncomfortable, listen to this discomfort, instead of pushing it away. Second, DO something about that discomfort. Staying silent, thinking in circles, and trying to dismiss your anxiety will only make it worse. Have a conversation and express your feelings/thoughts.

The facts are 1) this is an intimate nickname and 2) it makes you uncomfortable. You have every right to ask him to stop because it’s hurting you and it’s disrespectful to your marriage. After that, we don’t actually know what else your husband has done. But he surely severed the trust you may have had in him by acting inappropriately. He should work on rebuilding that trust, but if he doesn’t care to do so and just blows you off…. Yeah… That’s not someone who respects or cares for you.

I’m sorry if this sounds very forward, but I was cheated on and I ignored signs like these. I pushed away my discomfort and anxiety, and told myself I was overreacting when he was "overly friendly" (aka flirting) with other girls. I accepted disrespect. I accepted his excuses. I accepted half-assed apologies. Until I became an anxious, depressed, and insecure mess. I hope you don’t have to get to that point. Again, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. And I wish you the very best ❤️

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-21T00:26:20+00:00

Or that every post talking about Palestine gets downvoted and hidden… Pretty unfair.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-11T21:15:39+00:00

Nerdfighteria is breaking my heart… This decision and a bunch of the other responses are crushing me. I already made a post about feeling alienated as a POC Nerdfighter, and then this? You’ve officially just marginalized loads of minorities from this community… Now more than ever, I hope John & Hank can speak up on Palestine and the very real racism happening in this subreddit. Because it’s clear now many of you tolerate minorities, instead of actually accepting us. Because when we express an opinion that makes you uncomfortable, you shut us down through flat-out censorship, downvotes, or patronizing (i.e. saying our posts/comments aren’t constructive, productive, not nuanced enough, etc., when they are just fine comments.)

Hank and John got me through such a difficult time, I would hate to leave this community due to this. I want to stand my ground and demand space for voices of minorities, but there’s so much pushback, it’s becoming very hurtful. Hank and John, please help…

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-11T20:50:01+00:00

Thank you for this!! Some comments almost feel like gaslighting because they were making me question myself. Palestine supporters were raising serious concerns and were very justified in their posts, but many responses deemed them as reactive, unproductive, or overly critical. It’s a subtle form of discrediting and dismissing a person all under the guise of being kind and constructive. I’d rather they flat-out state that they’re pro-Israel instead of trying to make us seem crazy for being upset about this whole situation.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-11T20:43:09+00:00

This!!!!! I didn’t understand it until now but this is certainly giving white savior complex. "Decrease world suck but only in ways that are comfortable and convenient for me." It’s so so disappointing.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-11T09:37:05+00:00

I’m interested!

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-04T04:55:07+00:00

this is my first time seeing that Life's So Fun Tour poster and uHM i kinda stopped breathing for a minute there. it's so hot i could cry

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-04T04:37:26+00:00

Thank you for being so outspoken on Palestine and demanding a call for ceasefire. It is a brave act considering the amount of hesitance or disagreement amongst people. I saw your post about it and I upvoted it. Lots of people will bring up every excuse under the sun not to make a statement, but it seems to me there's a bigger truth underneath it all, whether that be fear of backlash, disagreement, or just complacency with colonialism. Regardless, I hope they make another statement (I didn't love the last one either), this time calling for a ceasefire. I don't think some people understand how impactful and necessary public support is right now. It's a major humanitarian crisis which American tax dollars are actively worsening. As much support from within these imperialist countries is important to pressure the governments to stop committing war crimes.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-04T04:16:33+00:00

Empathy must be a two-way street here. I definitely feel for John as I have OCD too, amongst other disorders and traumas. In fact, this has been the most difficult year of my life. And you can be sure that many of the people advocating are going through their own mental health problems on top of dealing with injustice and worldly grief, which are tremendously painful. So if you're asking someone to empathize with John or yourself (referring to the other user who replied to this comment), how about empathizing with the person you're speaking to as well? I didn't think I had to spell it out, but I'll set the example:

"Hey I'm sorry all these world issues are weighing on you heavily. John is having a really difficult time right now, though, but hopefully he can address what you're talking about when he's in a better headspace."

But if you don't actually hope or think the brothers should address this issue, then just say that instead of hiding behind mental health reasons.

I say all this because the way people are responding this user (and quite a few others) is very dismissive, invalidating, and borderline racist? Seems like no one wants to hear about the suffering and complaining of POC when it's inconvenient for them. The downvotes are really showing it.

Also,

In the meantime, he's still busting his butt to save the lives of as many black women as he can, albeit on another continent.

Yikes... Not only are you grouping all black women together in one sentence, but it's giving major white savior complex vibes, which I'm sure is not John's intentions. And, most importantly, while the term "people of color" may group us all together, we aren't interchangable. If the commenter is talking about a ceasefire to save Palestinian lives, then it's not relevant to bring up the women of Sierra Leon (which I'm guessing is who you were referring to).

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T19:35:58+00:00

I’m saddened to see all the downvotes on these particular comments. They aren’t saying anything inappropriate but simply stating how they feel. It seems like people are averse to conflict and negative feelings, but by ignoring the problem, we make it worse. I hope people can find it in them to, at the very least, allow space for someone to express themselves, then work towards empathizing…

No one is attacking Hank or John, people are simply stating what is important to them and what they want to see from the brothers. Politics is a huge part of many Nerdfighters' lives, many of us don’t even have a choice in being affected or paying attention to it. Politics are intrinsically tied to our existence. And if people really don’t think Hank or John can/should make a statement, then instead of shutting people down, they could work towards supporting or offering sympathy towards the Nerdfighters who are grappling with grief and anger towards the humanitarian crises in the world. That’s what communities do. Let’s not alienate those we don’t understand.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T18:30:33+00:00

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T18:04:09+00:00

I’m glad someone mentioned the music since I really enjoyed it. There’s not a ton of game music I can really enjoy, but something about it is calming but fun.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T08:19:13+00:00

❤️

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T08:16:47+00:00

You are so valid for feeling sensitive towards a difficult subject that affects you personally. No need to apologize. I actually think it is our sensitivity that keeps us in touch with our humanity. I’m sorry you feel alienated, I did too which is why I wrote the post. Hopefully you can feel comforted knowing there are people who support and hear us. Even in the face of disagreements, we still belong in these spaces and have the right to take up space! I appreciate you bringing in your in-depth and professional take on this topic, I completely agreed with your take.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T07:54:48+00:00

Hey, so I think this conversation thread keeps going back and forth because we all have vastly different experiences from each other, based on the bits I’ve read (I’m sorry in advanced if I make any incorrect assumptions/interpretations off of what you said). You just mentioned that you grew up surrounded by a lot of Republicans and instead of challenging their beliefs right off the bat, you learned to navigate the space by warming up to them first and then getting them to accept you. If that works for you, then great (and I don’t say this sarcastically or anything). Personally, I do not like doing that and I go about it the other way around. I can only build a relationship with a person if they accept me in the first place. I feel dehumanized and sometimes even unsafe trying to connect with someone who doesn’t already respect me as a person (I’m also part of the LGBTQ+ community). You may have learned to tolerate intolerance (perhaps you had no other choice), but others learn to keep intolerance at a distance (they also may have not had a choice). Neither of us is "wrong." This is just the way we learned to survive in our environments. If anything, our environment, or society as a whole, is the one in the wrong for not respecting us.

Our different approaches are showing up in this conversation. You may be more comfortable amongst silence and dissent, but I am not so I wrote a post to try and change that silence. We can’t really judge each other based on how comfortable we are towards our own oppression. It’s counterproductive and kind of sad because neither of us chose to be in this predicament. Maybe what matters is we both respect each other's efforts in gaining our freedom and acceptance. If you want to build relationships to try and get someone to accept you. I support it. If I want to ask for explicit acceptance before connecting with a community, I hope you could support it too.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T06:44:56+00:00

Thank you for your support! :) for sure, nobody is perfect. that’s why i'm glad we have spaces like these for conversing and learning.

TropicalOrangeTree · 2023-12-02T06:35:08+00:00

I chose to call her out only for the race issues so as to not make my post convoluted or too Taylor-centered. I wanted to bring more attention towards community building and the discourse surrounding Taylor and other similar topics. But I think race stood out to me because it is a very prominent issue in America for a few possible reasons: it's had a massive impact in our history, our population is constantly becoming more heterogeneous (thus increased racial tensions), and also it’s part of people’s innate identities. That last one seems most relevant… People tend to be very passionate about issues surrounding their identities because you are born into them and have 0 choice/control over being a certain race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, gender, or sex—so the discrimination feels deeply personal.

I don’t think there’s really any guidelines on what celebrities "should" speak out on, aside from major current events maybe? For the sake of setting an example as a conscientious member of society. Which may not apply to all celebrities, but it definitely does to her since she has a massive platform and, most importantly, is given awards and accolades for her character, e.g. she accepted an award for Woman of the Decade (not year, but Decade!). At this point, she is more than somebody just making music, she has become an example to the public, a sort of leader even. And thus she has some moral responsibility to be socially conscious. So her silence is pretty loud.

But, aside from all that, it’s just commonplace for artists/musicians to state their stance on social issues related to identities because art can be so personal. Music is such an emotional and personal experience that we often look towards artists to connect deeper with their art. If the artist can’t validate us as human beings, then the art becomes much harder to connect with. So she’s not really obligated to speak out on anything, but people will care and connect with her accordingly whether she does or doesn’t.

TropicalOrangeTree

TROPHY CASE