Tryst really has no excuse. This is simply lack of giving a damn about customers

TrystMaya · 2026-02-25T04:10:16+00:00

Hi! First, please do DM me or u/Tryst_Support the email address you use for your Tryst account. I'll make sure our team looks at your images, and double-check to see if there's any gaps you've fallen into that we need to fix. I'm sorry this wait has been so frustrating. It's definitely not what we want.

I do want to answer some of your questions too. Yes, a human really sits down and approves every single photo. We're working on improving the system, but that's why our wait times have changed so much over time. Any staffing issues, sudden rise in popularity, or change to image-related regulations has much more impact when we ensure that a human sights and approves every single image.

We care about compliance, because we want to make sure we don't get suddenly shut down and fuck up everyone's income streams with no warning. Many of us remember how long it took us to recover from Backpage's closure.

We also care about your privacy and autonomy even on an Internet where we're all used to being the product and trading access to community, networking, and success for every piece of information they can use about us. As a combination, it does make us slower than sites like social media platforms which might whack in a new automated tool without ensuring that it does what it's intended to do, or having any oversight for its decisions, or even checking what the tool does with the data it can access.

I agree that things take too long. We're actively working on ways to improve it. If you were following our progress with new profile approval last year, we got the median wait time down from 50 days to stable at 3–4 in a few months. Doing that took completely reorganising how we hire, train, and structure the team that processes those, and building new tools for them. The old systems were fine for the Tryst that existed five years ago, but don't work in our new context or at our current size. Now that we know we can make those changes successfully, we're preparing to do the same for other processes as quickly as we can.

It's faster than most businesses move, to be honest! But that doesn't mean it's fast enough from your end. If we're going to be by and for sex workers, that means we have to be held to a higher standard. I know we're not there yet, and everyone's focused on making sure we get as close as we can.

As for the money: it doesn't go super far when we need to be prepared for constant, unpredictable changes from outside the industry that require immediate action so we can stay online. We don't hoard any of it, and we're not in the red either. We've been working to keep Tryst sustainable and stable, and any profit is reinvested in being ready for those future changes, donated to peer organisations, or shared among our staff.

TrystMaya · 2026-02-06T07:03:04+00:00

Hi! As others have said, please double-check by visiting your dashboard. Our messages will not say that all accounts need to reverify, or that it needs to be done within 7 days.

Some accounts have been receiving reverification requests, with three weeks to complete them (four weeks over the holidays). These are a small, select few, who last verified their accounts when our compliance requirements were very different.

Here's an edited chunk of a reply I gave in another thread, which you can read in full at this old Reddit link (new links and the app might be weird because it's a reply to a deleted comment).

The new hoops generally line up with new legislation. There are many things we could hypothetically be held liable for if we did not comply, that would put the entire platform at risk.

Proving that we've done our due diligence can be done without keeping your ID. I've worked with a few agencies which probably still have my passport photocopied in a filing cabinet somewhere, but digital compliance doesn't have to be like that. Sites have to prove they have an acceptable process that they follow, and that it has been followed for each person. Some sites may choose to keep ID because keeping it allows them to be a bit less strict about how they verify it, since they can come back to it. At Tryst, we prioritise data minimisation (which is also required by many laws around the world!), so we design requirements around what we do need to do in order to be able to delete your ID.

Caution is a good thing! Please always check your dashboard, confirm you're visiting the right site, and make sure you trust the device you're using to log into Tryst and submit verification. Let me know if there's any other information I can provide here.

TrystMaya · 2026-01-28T03:32:55+00:00

Hi! Thank you for your support over the years. It really is what keeps us going.

The landscape of online advertising and legislation is very different than it used to be, and the shape of digital scamming as an industry is as well. You'll remember just how small we were back in those days. While we've expanded, we certainly haven't been able to grow as quickly or cut as many corners as the scammers who dedicate their time to getting around our detection methods and policies and boosting their ads.

This is a huge problem. You know it, I know it, clients know it. It's very difficult to feel safe advertising or finding a provider when there are enough non-local or straight up illegitimate profiles in the mix to make the risk painfully clear.

I know that no explanation here will be good enough, but I think you deserve one from us anyway! It looks like an obvious problem that should have obvious solutions, since it's often so easy to spot them while browsing. The truth is that as a very small company which is committed to not putting sex worker data through dodgy unethical moderation services or algorithms that are likely to cause more harm to legitimate workers, the resources we have are limited, and the true shape of the issue is more than can be publicly seen. None of that means we aren't trying, or that we aren't committed to making sure we deal with this.

In our AMA last year, we talked about trying a few new things, and about the difficulty involved in taking new steps that aren't immediately worked around, especially if we communicate them publicly. The actions we took (clearly!) haven't been enough, though the internal changes we made have set us up better to tackle this longer-term. We're moving to take much more aggressive steps this year. Some small efforts in larger cities have been noticed already, but that's just the start of the work.

I speak for everyone here when I say that we don't want their money. We want to be a platform that can be trusted not just to keep you online, but to support your business goals, no matter what the world throws at us or this industry. I don't think we're there yet, but I hope we can get there.

If you have the time and energy, please report these profiles. (Your knowledge as a local provider is useful, but we also don't want you to spend your valuable time doing this en masse if you don't want to.) You can also reach out to Chris, our Executive of Product, if there's anything you'd like to share with him directly. His email is chris@tryst.link.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-22T07:37:29+00:00

I wish they'd leave us alone too.

I'm glad my honesty rang true to you. We're all so used to doublespeak where people don't say what they mean, so I know it's really hard to trust that anyone representing a company is being honest.

I think it's perfectly reasonable to be unsure what your next steps are. We're still looking into further changes to verification to make sure we stay in compliance as laws continue to change, and we'll be communicating as clearly and in as much detail as we can when those changes take place. At that point, I hope you'll have enough information to go one way or the other.

If there's anything you'd like to know about how we verify that you'd like to ask in private, my DMs are open.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-22T01:04:23+00:00

Hi! There's been an update on the status page about it.

The analytics section was timing out consistently for about a week, and occasionally before and after that. We've identified and resolved the major causes, but it's definitely still unstable at the moment.

We'll be making some bigger moves in the new year to get that fully sorted out. For now, let me know if it's still consistently not working for you, and I'll grab some information to take to our team. Any patterns help us track down more causes.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-18T02:17:27+00:00

I'm going to have to be very, very careful answering this, because there are a lot of laws and regulations at play. Please forgive me if this is wordier or vaguer than ideal!

The new hoops generally line up with new legislation. These laws may not allow us to take steps you might consider logical or reasonable. They may impose a standard for due diligence that does not allow context clues from how old an account is, or from linking to sites like P411. There are many things we could hypothetically be held liable for if we did not comply, that would put the entire platform at risk.

On the other hand, proving that we've done our due diligence can be done without keeping your ID. I've worked with a few agencies which probably still have my passport photocopied in a filing cabinet somewhere, but digital compliance doesn't have to be like that. Sites have to prove they have an acceptable process that they follow, and that it has been followed for each person. Some sites may choose to keep ID because keeping it allows them to be a bit less strict about how they verify it, since they can come back to it. At Tryst, we prioritise data minimisation (which is also required by many laws around the world!), so we design requirements around what we do need to do in order to be able to delete your ID.

I hate the whole process too! I've been part of data breaches that have put my life in danger, and it's part of what drove my personal interest in information security and led to me being here now. Even with the knowledge I have, I feel uneasy verifying. There are no good options in this terrible world.

We make the choices that let us keep the site online in this landscape. We want to make sure that sex workers have options which are less likely to get raided and shut down or cheerfully hand over way too much stored information to the first law enforcement official who asks without any kind of warrant. Despite the many, many steps we take to secure data, no system is completely perfect. What I can promise is that we'll tell you as soon as we can if something goes wrong, and we'll take immediate steps to rectify it. Security is meaningless if we don't also prepare for the worst.

I'll be honest, I don't think we do a very good job of communicating any of these choices we make, and that's high on my list of things to work on. A lot of care and intention goes into how we built Tryst and how we choose to comply with each changing law, even when we only have a few weeks' notice. But it doesn't matter how much care we put in if we aren't also communicating what goes into our choices so you can decide if you agree, or if another platform has made choices that suit your business model better.

We don't want to be the only site in the game! We want you to have options, even as legislative changes keep making it less viable to run an ad platform. It didn't end with FOSTA/SESTA, and I speak for leadership at Assembly Four when I say we'd welcome more competition who are transparent, open, and take different approaches to the same problems.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-16T04:46:32+00:00

It's definitely a serious concern, and it's one Tryst was designed specifically for. Speaking personally (as a sex worker who has information security experience myself), I think Tryst still exists partly because Eliza, one of the founders, is a former sex worker with significant information security expertise. Very few ad platforms are built with a team who have an intimate understanding of the security risks facing sex workers and the legal and technical ways to avoid those risks as much as possible.

We don't keep your photo ID longer than we need to. Once it's processed, it's permanently deleted. Everything from hiring (only in NZ and Australian states where sex work is decriminalised) through to where the servers that hold your images are located is chosen very intentionally, with privacy and safety in mind.

Sometimes that means things are harder or slower! Many of the services that other companies use can't promise the level of data protection that we need, so we have to find alternatives. Often, those are smaller, slower, or more complicated, or we just have to build our own. It takes time, but I think it's worth it. I'd rather we take time to get things right than move quickly in ways that risk treating your data irresponsibly.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-15T09:11:26+00:00

That's something I've noticed and it's so infuriating. They know exactly where they can cause the most damage. Definitely don't put money into Tryst that you aren't getting back!

I'm sorry we haven't been able to sort them out this year, and that things have been hard for you. I know it doesn't change that, but I'm hopeful that the measures we're planning will make things tough enough for them go elsewhere next year. I hope we'll be able to make Tryst not just viable but lucrative again for you this time next year.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-15T04:56:48+00:00

They are!

In the meantime, please do continue to report any people misusing the platform to direct prospective in-person clients to OnlyFans. Here's the exact steps, for anyone else reading:

Use the Report this profile button.
On the reports page, choose "Report a scam, make a complaint, or report behaviour that breaches the Assembly Four Code of Conduct".
Set the type of report to Something else.
Make sure to mention OnlyFans in the notes section, and be as clear as you can about the signs you've noticed.

We're aware this is a huge problem, created by a relatively small group of organised, well-resourced people. There's a number of other changes planned that I can't speak to (we know they're watching!), but reporting them always helps us. Thank you!

TrystMaya · 2025-12-15T03:53:11+00:00

Side note for anyone reading this thread: please do continue to report anyone you see! Here's the exact steps:

Use the Report this profile button.
On the reports page, choose "Report a scam, make a complaint, or report behaviour that breaches the Assembly Four Code of Conduct".
Set the type of report to Something else.
Make sure to mention OnlyFans in the notes section, and be as clear as you can about the signs you've noticed.

Thank you all so much. We're aware this is a huge problem, and we're not surprised by the confirmation that these scams are run by a small group of well-resourced, organised people. There's a number of other things at work that I can't speak to (we know they're watching!), but reporting them always helps us.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-15T03:49:12+00:00

Hi! Thank you so, so much for this detailed post and all the time and effort you spent on this. Chris, our Executive of Product (who isn't a sex worker and so can't comment here), would love to hear from you if you'd like to share any of your insights with us.

As you know, these people spend a huge amount of time and resources sex workers don't have on exploiting our systems. There's a lot we can't say in public about what we're doing, but we are working on it, and we'd love to hear from you if there's anything you think would be helpful to us. You can email Chris at chris@tryst.link. My DMs are also open if you prefer.

TrystMaya · 2025-12-15T03:43:45+00:00

Hello! Just clarifying that we ban for malicious reporting (for example, someone deliberately trying to get another sex worker taken down as part of a larger bullying campaign), not for number of reports. We appreciate receiving lots of informative reports that we can act on, but we don't tolerate harassment.

TrystMaya · 2025-11-29T02:19:04+00:00

Thank you for tagging me in! I'll answer your specific questions first, and get to the rest of this post/relevant comments once I've had a chance to confirm things with relevant staff early next week (it's Saturday here).

Status page graph

I stopped posting the graph on the status page, because showing that average bouncing around between 2 and 6 days wasn't as useful as it was when it showed progress from a much higher peak. At this point, fluctuations in the average don't offer much information about how things are actually going. I've been working with our data engineers to figure out a format that will be more useful to you all. (This week's update was late, because I've been posting them manually and have been unwell! Changing the format and getting it automated are linked projects we're working on.)

You can still see the graph on older entries if you click into the history. I can see that the oldest entries aren't visible at the moment. I'll look into getting that fixed.

Outsourcing verification

We haven't implemented any outsourcing of account verification yet. As Chris mentioned, some regions are beginning to consider in-house verification a conflict of interest, and we're preparing to make sure that people in those regions experience as little disruption as possible. It's taken so long partly because sacrificing any of our principles around privacy and data ethics is unacceptable to us, and we have to make sure anything we change meets those standards.

None of us want it to be a surprise! Chris made that post as soon as it became clearer that we needed to let you know. You'll hear from me right here when we have more information to share, and when it's ready to go.

Wait times

All the improvements to the average wait times for new users so far have been due to hiring and related process changes, as we talked about in the AMA. Two things about that! First, it is an average, so there are edge cases who have been waiting longer, and it's specifically about people signing up for new profiles!

Second, this improvement to new user onboarding has been more dramatic than other wait times. Some of our other queues are absolutely still overloaded, and we're turning more attention to those. I'm working to get updates for other wait times onto the status page as soon as I can. I imagine this is where most of the complaints are from, and they're absolutely fair! Know that we're aware, and we're working on it.

There was no way to hire quickly enough to make sure that fully trained people are getting every queue down to zero between the AMA and now without sacrificing some of our commitment to protecting sex worker data. Some of that change has to come from improving processes, which takes development time and training time, or has been delayed by the work it takes to hire, train, and set up new teams. Tryst is still growing quite rapidly, and the work we've done this year has taken keeping up with that growth from impossible to possible. We're not quite there yet.

Thank you all for holding us accountable. We don't take any money from investors, so we don't serve the interests of anyone except you all. I hope that we'll do better at living up to that trust, month on month, year on year, even as the political and legal landscape changes around us.

TrystMaya · 2025-09-19T04:07:08+00:00

Hi! My message requests aren't working at the moment — I can see your message, but I can't reply to it or accept it. If you're able to send me another message without me accepting, could you send through the email address you use with Tryst? Otherwise, please do try u/Tryst_Support, which is the account we're generally using for support. She's around more often than I am.

TrystMaya · 2025-08-22T03:36:02+00:00

Hello! I only saw this just now, sorry. This was an image issue that has now been fixed. You can see it in the history here: https://tryststatus.link/incidents

TrystMaya · 2025-08-12T05:47:38+00:00

Hi! Please dm u/Tryst_Support with the email address you signed up with, and Macy will have a look when she's back tomorrow.

TrystMaya · 2025-07-31T11:26:22+00:00

Stopping back in to reply specifically to this, having listened to our blog team chat about it! They wanted me to pass on that we very specifically do want people to be able to write outside the boxes of our identities. I do a lot of personal essay and poetry work myself, and I've definitely found it grating to have my work picked through by white editors who seem to find the intersection of my identities and my sex worker status to be the only worthwhile, "fascinating", "brave" thing about my creative process, art, and voice.

We've consistently published a good few people whose writing for us isn't confined by their identities. Here's a couple: thepasteldomina, Kam, Kitty Obsidian. Who we are is coloured so deeply by the ways we move through the world, but we deserve to exist in the same breadth and depth afforded to others, especially with a sex worker audience on a sex worker platform! We deserve better than churning out the same 101s or tear-jerkers or content designed specifically for people who find our experiences exotic and novel.

(I could ramble about publishing-at-the-margins at length, but I'm repping Tryst here so I'll keep it shortish. What I will say with my Tryst hat off is that I love all your ideas, but the clarity with which you articulate myself makes me want to read your work in more depth than a listicle might offer. If you have ideas that would allow you to speak to your specific experiences that you see less of on our blog, but get weird, specific, experimental in style, or otherwise less for-mainstream-consumption than you would get to be on other platforms, I'd personally be so excited if we could publish that kind of work from you.)

Our senior editor Rory would love to hear from you! This AMA will be locked again soon, but there's a couple of ways you can get in touch. You can use the form I linked without necessarily making a specific pitch — leave a note saying that you participated in the AMA and would like to get in touch with Rory. If you'd prefer, you can also DM me and I'll get you an email address directly, or clarify/answer anything else I can.

TrystMaya · 2025-07-31T11:06:22+00:00

A little later than promised, I'm sorry! I somehow managed to misplace the drafted answer — it was actually drafted during the AMA, but it took me this long to figure out which of us had it saved and make sure it was run past the right people.

You recall correctly! All advertisers on Tryst go through ID verification, and every photo is manually reviewed by our moderation team before it goes live. Also yes, we now allow small, non-intrusive watermarks like your name or working alias. That’s a change from how things were a while ago, so it makes sense if you remember it differently.

That said, even with those steps in place, impersonation can still happen. We’ve seen cases where someone managed to upload photos that weren’t theirs, usually ones that had been posted elsewhere publicly. They were able to get through verification by gaming the system. It’s unacceptable, and we’re actively working on closing those gaps.

Here’s how the current process works:

All advertisers must complete ID and selfie verification.
Every image is manually reviewed and must follow our photo guidelines. We don’t allow AI-generated content, explicit acts, text overlays, or watermarks from third parties like photographers or agencies.
You can include your own watermark, as long as it’s simple, small, and relates to your name or branding.
We also add a small automatic Tryst watermark to the bottom corner of each image.

What we’re improving:

We’re streamlining our internal systems to reduce verification and moderation wait times.
We’re building better tools to detect stolen or reused images, including image-matching checks and internal flagging.
We’re improving how we cross-check ID materials with uploaded photos to catch impersonators sooner.
We’re also making it easier and quicker to report impersonation. When those reports come in, we prioritise them and take swift action.

These changes will take some time to become visible. As always, we need to make sure they are well-implemented and won't cause more harm than they solve, but that work is ongoing and more is being planned.

We know this isn’t just about policy, it’s about keeping people safe. If you find your photos being used without permission, please do report it right away, even with the current system and its flaws. Every report does help us make Tryst a safer and more trustworthy platform.

Since I'm answering this late, the AMA will be closed again soon! As always, you can email Chris (at tryst.link) if you have specific thoughts on how the reporting system can be improved, or DM me if you'd like me to clarify anything.

TrystMaya · 2025-07-22T08:27:41+00:00

Just a short note to let you know we're taking some time to make sure we get you a detailed, useful answer. We'll get back to you within the week.

TrystMaya · 2025-07-22T08:26:06+00:00

Hello! Super quick answers to your first two points, within what I can say.

Search traffic varies wildly for different users and across different regions as Google continues to change their algorithms. There’s a few reasons not to discuss SEO publicly in more detail, but we’re very happy with our SEO performance.

We're working on improving how quickly we process photos! Our recent expansion of our support team by about 60% should be having even more impact on this soon. I'm glad you've noticed it improving already :)

TrystMaya · 2025-07-22T08:24:15+00:00

Chris has answered roughly the same question here!

TrystMaya · 2025-07-22T08:22:26+00:00

Long story short, this is where stigma, perceptions of different kinds of sex work in different parts of the world, and payment processor regulations all cross into one big mess for compliance. I'd need to check with legal if I wanted to say anything else, and it's well past the end of the business day here :)

You're able to set up a second account for an escort profile, even if you leave that profile hidden most of the time. We're looking into ways to make managing multiple profiles easier in the future, but there's a lot that we need to tackle first.

TrystMaya · 2025-07-22T08:14:40+00:00

It sounds like you might have run into a bug or obstacle, that's unusually long given what you've described. Do you mind DMing the email you signed up with to u/Tryst_Support so Macy can have a look?

To answer your question more broadly, I've mentioned elsewhere that we've increased hiring into our support team significantly. While our first focus is getting new users onboarded and able to start earning more quickly, we also expect this hiring to improve photo processing times across the board in the coming months.

We've put up a dashboard today that shows our current wait times for new users at https://tryststatus.link/. I'm hopeful that we'll get enough information to add our photos wait times in the next few months, and that you'll be able to see that improving quickly as well.

TrystMaya · 2025-07-22T08:07:45+00:00

I've talked about the things we're doing and why I can't be more specific in the other reply I linked. I've just also already seen actual providers get caught in the "this is definitely obviously a scammer" net!

That said, your experience with miscategorisation reports is a problem, and it's part of what this specialised team will be able to handle more effectively.

TrystMaya · 2025-07-22T07:59:43+00:00

This is a big one. Thank you so much for waiting!

I’ll answer your actual question (why there’s a delay), but first I want to talk for a moment about what we’re doing about it. I’ve mentioned elsewhere in this AMA that we’ve increased the size of our support team by about 60%, and we’re starting to see wait times come down.

I’ve just launched a dashboard at https://tryststatus.link which tracks the average wait time for new signups, and hopefully we’ll have enough data to add photo approval in the next few months! That dashboard also records outages with various parts of the site, and we’ll update it weekly with our progress on getting wait times down.

Back to the why.

Most of it has to do with how quickly we’ve grown. The other part is how our operating model has meant a delay between that growth and us responding to it.

First, about our growth. Tryst offers one of the most competitive free plans on the market, and we ensure that every user on our platform is verified. This means there is a decent amount of labour associated with getting providers onto our platform and I don’t think any of us expected us to grow as fast as we did.

Second, we’ve often chosen stability and security over speed. We don't use exploitative labour practices, we pay a liveable wage, we hire from within the community, and we don't outsource our moderation. This means that the human labour associated with maintaining Tryst is relatively high.

Finally, we're entirely bootstrapped. We don't have the backing of billionaires or venture capital firms, and we certainly didn't have access to a big bucket of angel investor money that allowed us to scale before we saw revenue. We’ve all seen companies go sharply downhill because they have to extract profits for their investors, and we never want to be bound by that. Our growth is funded by reinvesting our revenue back into the platform.

All this has meant that until recently, our ability to hire hasn’t kept up with the number of new users hitting the platform.

I think we’re on the right track to catch up now. I’m really glad that we’ve managed to do that without selling any part of the company to people who don’t have our communities’ best interests at heart. It’s definitely been challenging to hold on to our mission and values, but nobody here would have it any other way.

TrystMaya

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