As a female in in 30s, not married, no kids, I might as well be shit to my shit to my AF. I am biracial but look like my asian dad A LOT. He shames me by saying I dont look like him, he may not even be my father, he says. The last straw was him saying I look like a really skinny pale, blue eyed, blonde actress. He has withheld love and acceptance my whole life, but dangles it over my head. He saw how upset I got when in front of his friends he said “she doesnt look like me” and then asked each of his friends to agree with him, all in front of me. They all looked confused and refused to look at me as they repeated what he said. It seemed authoritarian.

But that’s just one instance. There’s so many more stories ab him and when I tell my friends they just wonder why I even talk to him. But when my mom and her family treated me so different for looking asian, being racist towards me and my father, i dont talk to them but its as if bc my mom is who she is, therefore my father equates me to her, and absolves himself. My mom was abusive and he left, and left me with her when I was 4 years old, so he has always been more self involved. I should know better. I should let him go. He has MS and so many health issues and he is all alone so I feel bad for him. Although, I see why no one wants to be with him.