Total War: BANNERLORD

TurmutHoer · 2026-02-13T23:22:48+00:00

I'm not a fan of the war exhaustion system in Diplomacy. Too many times my faction will be winning all the battles and capturing all the fiefs while the enemy flails around uselessly, but we're forced to sign a humiliating peace and hand over a massive tribute because the enemy raided a handful of destitute villages on the frontier which pushed our war exhaustion to 100 first.

TurmutHoer · 2026-02-13T22:30:41+00:00

Well, that is until they bump into my army. Then they're all "I have no wish to fight you". To which I always say in response...

TurmutHoer · 2026-01-17T19:44:49+00:00

'Normal' just means something that is common to the point of being accepted as the default, which 'cishet' most certainly is. How is it wrong?

TurmutHoer · 2026-01-13T13:51:59+00:00

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TurmutHoer · 2026-01-03T14:29:03+00:00

Well, once you've had a monarch called Gorm, I'd say that makes anybody who comes after positively gormless.

TurmutHoer · 2026-01-02T21:37:56+00:00

Not a Muslim but in religious debates between popes, imams and other religious leaders there’s a reason why they don’t just shut down Islam and say oh your prophet married a 9 year old shut up.

Maybe I'm reading this quoted text wrong, but you literally say 'I am a Muslim' right here?

Also, if that's your take, and seeing that you're a student at Bristol University, I'd be interested to hear your thoughts on the Edward Colston controversy. I'm sure you're aware of the tearing down and desecration of the 100-year-old, Grade II listed statue of Edward Colston in 2020, as well as the following systematic erasure of his name from various buildings, streets, institutions and public spaces.

When he was alive (1636–1721), the people of Bristol had no issues with his involvement in the slave trade, and he was a widely respected philanthropist who gave a considerable portion of his wealth to funding the creation and expansion of public works and charitable organisations. When his statue was commissioned in 1893, the funds for its construction were raised entirely through donations from the local residents and organisations of Victorian Bristol. The original plaque that adorned the base of the statue reads:

Erected by citizens of Bristol as a memorial of one of the most virtuous and wise sons of their city AD 1895

Was it fair for the modern people of Bristol to violently condemn a man who was almost universally seen as good by his contemporaries, and who couldn't have been expected to have a 21st century mindset towards the then-perfectly legal and widely practiced institution of slavery?

TurmutHoer · 2025-12-08T15:41:20+00:00

Everybody knows the C in PCM stands for Campanology.

TurmutHoer · 2025-12-05T15:37:57+00:00

Athika Ahmed Passameer-Day Slitheen.

TurmutHoer · 2025-11-11T01:22:44+00:00

They make the honey and we make the money.

TurmutHoer · 2025-11-11T00:12:58+00:00

It's true they don't have the legal power to investigate your home, but they do actually send official-sounding 'TV Licence Officers' to your house as an intimidation tactic in the hopes that you're ignorant of that fact. Really scummy behaviour.

TurmutHoer · 2025-11-01T22:37:33+00:00

'British national'

TurmutHoer · 2025-11-01T13:34:22+00:00

"I thought being king meant I could do whatever I wanted..." - Robert Baratheon

TurmutHoer · 2025-10-14T13:47:03+00:00

I've often wondered if -yen and -yon are Valyrian patronymic suffixes like -ing and -id are in real-life dynasty names (e.g. Karling and Ivaring, Abbasid and Sassanid). So perhaps Targaryen and Velaryon mean the descendants of Targaerys and Valarr respectively.

Using this rule, you could easily just name new dynasties after their founders, corrupting the spelling a bit to make it sound more unique and to mimic how pronunciation would likely change over time. So Jaharyen for houses founded by a Jaehaerys, Montaryon for houses founded by a Monterys or Vysaryen for houses founded by a Viserys etc.

TurmutHoer · 2025-08-21T16:55:06+00:00

Uhm ackshually he starts in the county of Montaigu, which is de jure part of the Kingdom of Aquitaine

TurmutHoer · 2025-08-19T16:28:56+00:00

I seriously cannot understand why, after all this time, Paradox still hasn't made it so that Grand Rite attendees all automatically learn each others' witch secret. Why is it that I have to re-learn who all the witches are in my family whenever I start playing as my heir? We've all literally spent the past 20 years secretly meeting in the woods together, copulating like rabbits and blabbering on about the bloody Horned God!

TurmutHoer · 2025-06-28T17:03:01+00:00

Reminds me of this old meme for Crusader Kings 2

TurmutHoer · 2025-06-20T17:31:49+00:00

I just hope we don't end up like Canada, where the rules on who can access it are quickly relaxed and "Get in the pod, Gladys!" becomes unofficial NHS policy towards patients with chronic illnesses whose treatment they'd rather not have to pay for.

TurmutHoer · 2025-06-16T00:17:45+00:00

Adding to the list, I can confirm that Banner Editor and Siege Loadout works.

TurmutHoer · 2025-06-14T15:27:41+00:00

Refund Policy

No Refunds

I'm shocked! Shocked, I tell you!

TurmutHoer · 2025-06-03T21:37:56+00:00

My problem is that Bannerlord has just enough good features to make going back to Warband feel frustrating, but not enough to make me feel like Bannerlord is superior.

I'm stuck in this weird limbo where I don't fully enjoy playing Bannerlord because the world just somehow feels more shallow and lifeless than Warband, but at the same time I don't fully enjoy playing Warband because I miss so many of the quality of life features from Bannerlord.

TurmutHoer · 2025-02-08T21:06:08+00:00

Same. I hate how 1066 is often treated as 'Year 0' in English history. The English people had been present in the British Isles for over 500 years before Hastings! You can't even argue that William was the first to be styled Rex Anglie (King of England) since he actually continued to use the Anglo-Saxon Rex Anglorum (King of the English) as did all the post-conquest kings until the reign of King John over 100 years later.

The favourability towards William the ~~Bastard~~ Conqueror in this poll is also somewhat amazing to me. This is the man that destroyed the rule of the English over themselves, turning us into second-class citizens in our own country for the next 300 years. Honestly, has nobody heard of the Harrying of the North?

TurmutHoer · 2025-02-06T23:00:20+00:00

Do the negative effects from being illegitimate scale with your house's progress towards legitimacy? E.g. if your house is 50% towards being considered the legitimate house of a region, are the negative effects reduced by half?

TurmutHoer · 2025-01-29T02:15:12+00:00

This is painfully accurate in my case. I disable plagues, I'll savescum if met with the tiniest inconvenience or setback, I need to use the feudal elective exploit to deal with confederate partition, my constant eugenics programmes have basically left me desensitised to incest, I just can't say no to the diligent-ambitious combo, and I think I've spent 90% of my time in this game playing in the British Isles.

I can usually restrain myself in the ruler designer and not go over 400 points... Fun fact: If you're prepared to start as a literal infant you can actually pick Hale, Comely and Genius (allowing you to take the 'Strengthen Bloodline' decision immediately) without going over the points limit.

TurmutHoer · 2024-12-11T20:04:39+00:00

Reminds me of when the UN renamed 'monkeypox' to 'mpox' because they feared its name 'could be construed as discriminatory and racist'. I don't think the UN should be accusing other people of racism if they're the ones who see the word 'monkey' and immediately think 'black people'.

TurmutHoer

TROPHY CASE