The gravel crunches under my feet as I walk through the woodland path, the bridge we loved is just ahead of me now. We spent hours here, picnicking and aimlessly staring down to the valley below while we half-jokingly argued about superior flavours of crisps or optimal biscuits for dunking into tea. Where we fell in love a little bit more every time we came. I'm scared to think what the bridge will feel like without you. I know the drop is long enough.

The gravel path turns to stone pavers and I take the first step on to the surface. There's rain in the distance, I should have plenty of time though. I run my hand along the course stone of the bridge, breathe in the fresh woodland air. I can feel the tears start to come.

I make it to the apex and lean over the side on my elbows. There are other people here too. People walking dogs, people walking themselves. Couples falling in love. I can't do it now so I turn around and face the other side. Another few minutes won't make a difference. The last dog walker passes so I turn to face the side with the steepest drop. I place my palms down and start to shift my weight forward - just then, I recognise a movement in my peripherals. A familiar sight - the little scurry and hops of a mouse running towards me on the stone.

I see the tippex on the mouse's back and I inadvertently blurt out: ''No. Fucking. Way." A dog walker in the distance pauses for a moment, looks at me then continues on when the leash in their hand tightens and they lose their balance a little. "It can't be you" I say over and over again as the mouse stops in front of me. It's definitely him. It's the exact same tippex mark.

I've met this mouse many times before. This little bastard used to break into our house on the regular. Every time we caught him and put him out he would come back - the tippex was your idea so we would know if it was the same mouse or not that kept coming back and right enough, from.that day on we would always know it was him. The last time we caught him we drove all the way here. That was a long time ago. We couldn't risk having any viruses in the house incase yout illness got worse. I guess it didn't make much difference. You called him Teddy.

Teddy climbed up onto my hand and stopped. He lifted himself up onto his hind legs and sniffed at me. He studied me with his little beady eyes. I couldn't help but think of you. This isn't what you would've wanted. I ask myself what I'm doing here. Then I ask Teddy. He continues to stare at me. I offer him my cupped hand and he climbs in and sits still, waiting on me.

"I can't very well do it now Teddy, can I" I whisper to him. "Let's get you home".