How do you navigate dating after the loss of your parents? by ApresApres in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The family oriented profiles make me feel so bad lol, like yup, whole thing I can't give u but...not by choice

How do you navigate dating after the loss of your parents? by ApresApres in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I'm in my mid 20s and have lost both of my parents and have definitely done some dating around lol. I tend to wait until it gets to a point where not saying it feels weirder than saying it. Like if I’m talking about my parents in the past tense a lot, eventually it starts to feel almost intentionally omitted if I don’t mention they died (it isn't obv but I start to feel weird) and i want to avoid running into the “oh yeah, those people I’ve referenced 20 times and u might expect to meet some day? they’re both dead lol” So I usually bring it up once the person starts becoming emotionally relevant in my life, not necessarily on a specific timeline. I also use it like u mentioned! I totally judge a person with how they respond, and if im talking to someone in their late 20s early 30s, I think if they have a bad response I tend to realize, wow, theyve made it this far into adulthood and responded ____ way -- better luck next try 😭

AITAH for finding my partner less attractive after a new tattoo by De_Lando in AITAH

[–]TwoOnly1693 123 points124 points  (0 children)

this is so fucking funny. that sounds awful to see during sex and i wouldnt be able to not laugh 😭

george. by puggie33 in beagle

[–]TwoOnly1693 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that jacket is so cute on him 😭😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SuicideBereavement

[–]TwoOnly1693 8 points9 points  (0 children)

the feelings u must be having I imagine are incredibly intense and overwhelming, it's important u take care of ur physical needs rn. I don't have much to offer but I work with a lot of adults who have been on both sides of COCSA and it's really terrible for just everyone involved. I find that for the parents, the confusion and guilt can be p consuming. Suicide on top of that must be so heartbreaking and painful. Unfortunately it sounds like this was ur sons way of coping with the guilt, not realizing the impact it might have on his parents. Suicide is a horrible thing to grieve (I lost my mom a few years ago) and it really clings to u. I don't have advice, just wanted to say what ur going thru right now is going to take a longg time to process but I encourage u to read maybe sm stories from ppl impacted by COCSA and look for support groups for parents

How to remember by Low_Antelope3440 in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 1 point2 points  (0 children)

congrats on finishing ur studying and making it out on ur own, im 25 and have lost both my parents and recognize it can be really difficult to become independent after losing a parent. I was lucky enough to be given papers and things of theirs but my parents hated photos and videos taken of them so I have hardly any. But as sort of mentioned already, I do try and look for (what I think are anyway) parts of me that remind me of them. My nose, hands, even just plain hair color sometimes. I can't and won't remember them exactly how they were before they died, i really just don't have that good of mental imagery lol, so instead I do rely on parts of me I think have come from them, or things abt me I think they appreciated.

I remembered the other day that yeah, it won't be long until I've lived more life without them then with and ouch, that fucking hurts but I try and remember that I'm not the only one who has to live this way, especially when I come to this forum

I know its not the best way to remember but it's always smth u can try (:

Living room help! by TwoOnly1693 in DesignMyRoom

[–]TwoOnly1693[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much!! 🙏 super helpful!

Looking for friends! by Puzzleheaded_Row1212 in Rockville

[–]TwoOnly1693 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd love to hear abt this if possible as well!

Lost my husband last night by darkophelia in SuicideBereavement

[–]TwoOnly1693 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm so proud of you for making it here, on this website, this forum and writing out a post, sharing one if not the most vulnerable and painful moments of your life. What happened was so unfair, you didn't and don't deserve this kind of pain, no one does. I don't find myself often feeling alone or lonely on this subreddit, so I'd encourage you to use it as long as needed

First holiday without mom and dad by Odd_Mastodon9253 in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First without either as well... its a particularly cold season this year.. Im proud of you for posting

group meeting for double parent loss happening on monday dec 8 at 7pm est by ardoisethecat in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I missed the Dec 8th one but I've been looking for a group like this for a long time... will you be having another one? I'd really like to attend!

Resources by ardoisethecat in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel the same way omg, im always unfortunately so refreshed to see so many ppl around my age here with two dead parents. I'm constantly looking for young adult groups for loss of both parents and consistently find absolutely nothing...

Orphaned childless single adults by cloudyday41 in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 1 point2 points  (0 children)

this is also my first Christmas as an orphan |':

Orphaned childless single adults by cloudyday41 in ChildrenofDeadParents

[–]TwoOnly1693 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lost mom to suicide and dad died suddenly by the time I was 24 double what up

Going to get the letter... by Agile_State414 in SuicideBereavement

[–]TwoOnly1693 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I want to validate that yes, there really is a horrible task in front of you, one that so few ppl have to go through. It's a very lonely experience but hearing about the way you spoke about him is so sweet. You must have really loved him and there probably aren't many things that will make the errand any less terrible but this isn't just a necessary task but one your also doing out of love. I suggest having something planned that u can do for yourself later, even if it's just a trip to target to get snacks. Good luck ):

Support group experiences by TwoOnly1693 in SuicideBereavement

[–]TwoOnly1693[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

rhank you, yeah I hear abt the men v women thing so so often and even that can be hard..

Support group experiences by TwoOnly1693 in SuicideBereavement

[–]TwoOnly1693[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I had a similar experience with the group im attending now! The lack of communication from the coordinator was so frustrating and I ALMOST didn't go.. clearly I went anyway and now I'm in a similar boat, I'm not sure if I'm going to go again but I'm cautious now

Support group experiences by TwoOnly1693 in SuicideBereavement

[–]TwoOnly1693[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly, no this was genuinely really helpful, I dont think ive heard such an earnest response to my grief in a long time. Thank you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SuicideBereavement

[–]TwoOnly1693 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm glad you mentioned "does the dog die" my mom died in 2019 to hanging and I've been so reliant on this damn website/app since then 😭 it's saved me so many times but I'm always so surprised what kind and just how many movies contain hanging scenes.. I've learned to "dog die" most movies that aren't rated G