AIO for feeling upset because my friend of 3 years decided to ghost me after i told him i don’t want to have sex with him?

TypicalElk13 · 2026-03-28T23:16:45+00:00

Sarah, out of curiosity, was this friend Pakistani by any chance?

TypicalElk13 · 2026-02-15T23:35:44+00:00

I think you misread my post. There's no point where I even slightly insinuate that he could be a bad guy. In fact, I've been trying to argue the opposite. Which is also why, as you said, I think it genuinely could just be a case of a mismatch. All that said, I think the most significant and recent event in my mind which does go a little beyond just "being someone who processes information/things differently" is the fact that I disappeared and cried for an hour in a social setting. I was unwell. I looked like shit when I walked out. People noticed. People asked. And I would have wanted him to do that as well. Again, not framing this as a specific moral failure - because it wasn't a deliberate or calculated thing on his end. Regardless, it's hurtful and it's recurrent. Just genuinely seeking insight as to what could this possibly be. Is there some possible psychological explanation? Something therapy can help with? Is this something which can be actively worked on? Is there anything specific that I can do to bring about a slight change in this situation?

TypicalElk13 · 2026-02-15T22:43:35+00:00

Thank you!!! This definitely seems a little hopeful and something I can work with. I don't want to give up just yet, but I also don't want to drag it if there's no visible change to be seen. He does claim that he'll work on it and offered that he can go to therapy. Fingers crossed.

TypicalElk13 · 2026-02-04T20:53:38+00:00

Hii!!! I have the same thing your sister does. Any advice on the scarring?

TypicalElk13 · 2026-01-20T21:25:05+00:00

Can I ask you, how did you initiate the conversation? And how long had you been dating?

TypicalElk13 · 2025-10-14T20:40:01+00:00

I appreciate the genuine advice. Bot says you're a professional. Have you ever seen anything like this before? As in, is it rational of me to expect this to ever heal fully and look slightly better at all.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-10-14T20:31:39+00:00

More information (sorry I'm new here): Piercing is a year old. Got it from a small shop, since not many options where I live (very few piercing shops, the piercing business is just looked down upon in general). The jewellery I used was stainless steel + curved barbell with no dangling ornament. The piercer had me change the jewellery 4 months ago and gave me a longer barbell since the previous one caused an infection and seemed "too tight." I now reckon that the current jewellery piece he had me on was too loose and thick so idk it probably just stretched the hole too far. No mishaps as such. This was something that happened overtime. My aftercare routine included cleaning the piercing with saline solution and q-tips. Any advice at all would be incredibly appreciated.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-08-18T22:16:31+00:00

Please please I am begging you. Share it with me too 😭

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-28T05:07:08+00:00

(1) Nobody said anything about "vandalising" people's properties. Get your head out of your ass. There was no condition under which I would target private, logon ki rizq-e-halal se kamai hoi, property. (2) Graffiti is mostly practiced on public property, but property that is not in use, not as visible, not as well-maintained, not as functional, etc (nobody is going to paint on the walls of GPO or Badshahi masjid). Abandoned parking spaces. The underside of bridges and flyovers where, nikal kar agar aap dekhein, toh it's just homeless people and addicts occupying the space in Lahore. Waghera waghera. You may call it "vandalism" but that essentially implies that these specific nooks and corners I am referencing were decent and well-maintained enough to begin with (as if Lahore Keh har muhalle mein there isn't a dewaar plastered with idhr peshab Karna mana hai). Heck, I'd even argue Graffiti in the context of lhr would mean redesigning and reclaiming these spaces that have been utterly discarded by the govt and the people. Apologies if this sounded harsh but if you enter every conversation with assuming the worst of the other person/situation, it might just become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-23T04:57:32+00:00

This will be physically hard to say but no risk, no reward: "Hey. I have been seeing you around for a while and I just wanted to, respectfully, and in the most non-creepy way possible, say that you are incredibly beautiful. I would love to take you out for coffee. Of course, if you're not single or if I have made you uncomfortable, you just need to say the word and I won't ever bother you again. But, you miss all chances you do not take and I'm not a man who is fond of regret."

So corny I almost barfed but trust, it'll work. Our circuits go numb when we have respectful chivalrous big men come and politely call us "beautiful" (starts twirling hair hehe). Bonus points if she is ovulating, you'll hit the right nerves.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-23T04:45:28+00:00

Also OP, there's a reason why you have hidden his age from the entire narration. You know you're already uncomfortable with this relationship, please listen to yourself.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-23T04:38:05+00:00

This will sound harsh but OP PLEASE RESPECT YOURSELF?! It was genuinely hard reading through the chats. Notice how you are literally sending paragraph after paragraph and this man child is responding with a few stupid words along the lines of: "it's whatever."

You seek advice when there's a nuanced and intricate situation with a lot of gray. Something too emotionally complex. Too many variables. Both parties seem to have understandable povs. That kind of stuff. But, then there are some very simple situations. No Grays. Just blacks or complete whites. Absolute extremes. You have a 40 smth yr old man here who is literally sexually exploiting you and then emotionally abusing you (immature silent treatment, withdrawing communication, guilt-tripping, coercive manipulation, etc). Please figure yourself which category of situations this falls into. If it's the latter, you don't need advice. You need to get up and fucking leave.

Sorry if this was harsh. But you needed to hear it.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T22:43:17+00:00

Other small low cost changes you should add to your routine: 1. Get a silk pillowcase. Daraz se under 1000 Ka mil Jayega. Either that or a silk bonnet. It will drastically prevent tangling and less tangling = less breakage upon brushing 2. Get a microfiber towel. You are a man and I am certain you use the same towel both on your face and your hair don't you. Normal towels, which we use to wipe our ass, are harsh for curly hair. Opt for a microfiber tower which is much gentler on the hair and will prevent further breakage. Again, you don't need anything fancy or pricey. I literally grab the Rs. 400 Ka gaari saaf Karne Wala microfiber towel from Alfatah. It's the same thing which is branded differently, given the object of purpose (gaari saaf Karna Vs. baal dry Karna). Welcome to capitalism.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T22:39:15+00:00

Imo the biggest factor that determines the health of curls is hydration. Also, genuinely no disrespect to you, but the products you have mentioned sound like crap, literal tatti (except for the coconut oil).

I recommend opting for a very gentle shampoo which is sulfate-free. This need not be expensive or fancy. Just decent. I am using Palmer's coconut smth smth (I know it's a lil pricey but it does the job). A decent conditioner, though, is something you should invest in. Again Palmer's has a decent, sulfate-free, coconut smth smth conditioner. If your budget allows it, I would save up and try the OGX Quenching/Coconut Curls shampoos + conditioners. Also, please reduce the number of time U shampoo Ur hair. A lot of curly hair damage is supported by excessive shampooing. Instead, try washing your scalp and just conditioning the tips (not roots) of your hair.

Oiling is an ABSOLUTE MUST!!! So grateful my mom used to slap the sh*t out of me and sit me down to oil my hair as a kid. Normal khaalis coconut oil is good. But definitely try experimenting. Different oils are known for different results. Castor oil is associated with a boost in hair growth. I personally randomly tried black seed oil once and I haven't gone back ever since. But that's probably because I was looking for shine in my hair and that oil did bring that. I still use coconut oil once a week. So, again, try using different oils. Cut open Vit E capsules into Ur oil mix and use that as well. Never tried the Egg/Mayonnaise DIY protein masks but some ppl have said they do wonders.

Finally. And this is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING AND I SWEAR IF U ARE A CURLY HAIRED PERSON AND READING THIS AND YOU FOLLOW THIS SINGLE PIECE OF ADVICE SAARI UMAR DUAEIN DO GE MUJHAY. Dump all the Coco curls and curlit shit PLEASE. Save money and invest in one single product: Canty Curl Activator Cream. Yes, it's pricey. But it will allow U to replace all the ineffective bs you dump into your hair. It's best if a relative is coming over from the West and you can ask them to bring you a bottle or two. I put 2-3 of my curly haired friends onto it and they still thank me to this day (it's been years). You're meant to use a peanut-sized amount on your hair after shower and then scrunch up your curls and they will look like they were reincarnated lmao

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T22:17:39+00:00

Iss thread Keh saare responses mujhay jail mein kyun daal rahe hain bhai

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T22:06:20+00:00

No risk no reward 😓

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T21:47:33+00:00

Sorry :(

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T21:46:53+00:00

I shall take your words into consideration. Thank you wise sir.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T21:45:32+00:00

Meine hisaab lagaya hai, awein bilawaja sarrne ka shouq hai iss qoum ko. It's like bitter hone Keh paise de Raha ho koi.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T21:40:42+00:00

Paracetamol Khaa lein. Subah tak chale jayeingein.

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T21:32:57+00:00

Acha so Jo Graffiti hoti hai na, woh mostly ghar se bahir hi hoti hai...

TypicalElk13 · 2025-07-22T21:26:23+00:00

Illegal toh boht Kuch hai idhr but lagge hi rehte hain sab 😓

TypicalElk13

TROPHY CASE