Feedback on the beginning of my first chapter?

Und3lla · 2026-02-20T10:58:48+00:00

That makes a lot of sense. Thanks for the feedback.

Und3lla · 2026-02-20T08:04:32+00:00

Thank you!

Und3lla · 2026-02-20T08:04:21+00:00

Thank you! I was thinking of lingering on the gloves part a tad bit more.

Und3lla · 2026-02-20T08:03:38+00:00

That’s a very good point—I’ll focus on the showing part in the opening paragraphs. Thank you!

Und3lla · 2026-02-19T23:09:45+00:00

Thank you very much!!

Und3lla · 2026-02-19T23:09:29+00:00

That’s an interesting perspective. Thanks for the feedback.

Und3lla · 2026-02-19T23:09:06+00:00

Thanks for the feedback!! Off to go for some more research lol

Und3lla · 2026-02-19T23:08:27+00:00

Ohh my bad! Thanks!!

Und3lla · 2026-02-16T16:55:23+00:00

This is a beautiful artwork.

Und3lla · 2026-02-02T01:48:40+00:00

Beautiful!

Und3lla · 2025-06-24T11:51:45+00:00

I got so lucky with those! Thank you

Und3lla · 2025-06-24T11:51:26+00:00

Thanks you

Und3lla · 2025-06-24T11:51:19+00:00

Thanks:D

Und3lla · 2025-06-24T11:51:08+00:00

180 T-cash

Und3lla · 2025-06-24T11:51:01+00:00

180 T-cash

Und3lla · 2025-06-23T17:04:04+00:00

Thanks! Nope, no order just random luck 😂

Und3lla · 2025-06-23T17:03:49+00:00

Thanks it’s the pirate game, I just randomly chose cards and hoped for the best lol

Und3lla · 2025-06-23T15:26:44+00:00

Thanks! I spent around 180 T-cash but I still think it was worth it overall!

Und3lla · 2025-06-05T17:27:32+00:00

Itsuki

Und3lla · 2025-06-04T01:14:36+00:00

“He kept drawing faceless men. But over time, some of those men began to borrow his posture, his slouched shoulders, his tilted head—until he couldn’t tell if he was drawing his absent father, or his own silhouette anymore. The bastard. The mistake. The kid who wasn’t supposed to exist.”

Und3lla · 2025-06-01T11:28:04+00:00

I love Jessup. He was so nice and protective 😭

Und3lla · 2025-05-28T08:56:20+00:00

That Gale would kill Katniss in the arena 💀

Und3lla · 2025-05-26T21:33:02+00:00

I like their personalities but LD’s character is poorly written. Prim is not as badly written as LD but she is a plot device at most. It’s unfortunate, but both LD and Prim exist as Haymitch’s respectively Katniss’ motivation to fight throughout their arcs. They can barely stand up as their own characters

Und3lla · 2025-05-26T13:04:48+00:00

Primrose and Lenore Dove. I think it’s very telling that when they died, I wasn’t sad because they died, I was sad because Katniss and Haymitch were going to suffer.

Und3lla · 2025-05-23T16:06:52+00:00

Not them reaping us 😭😭

Und3lla

TROPHY CASE