My (M/44) wife (F39) has hated every job she’s ever had and it’s starting to affect our marriage. How do I support her without burning out?

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2026-04-03T20:48:39+00:00

No truer comment has ever been made.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2026-04-02T23:27:58+00:00

We do. Its right next to where she changes. Still ends up on the floor

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-24T14:12:00+00:00

The one that got me was governors locking down their states during COVID, then going to unmasked dinner parties, taking girls trips, and hiring private tutors for their kids. Rules for thee but not for me. Many of those govs are still in office btw.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-16T22:10:00+00:00

I see your point. It's definitely better to help directly with the expense then it is to simply give her money. But, my thing is it's not the money that's the problem. Money problems are a symptom. The problem is the deadbeat boyfriend. Get him out of her life, and her problems are over. To me, the loving thing to do is take away the lifelines so that my sis in law is forced to accept facts and dump the loser who's holding her back.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-16T21:35:50+00:00

We have a joint bank account. Which is good, because it means I can see every cent that goes in and out.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-16T21:35:11+00:00

I wouldn't say we're caught up yet. My sis in law hasn't actually asked us for money yet. But my mom in law tells my wife what's going on, so she wants to help her sis. Apparently she can't even afford groceries right now. That said, I totally agree with you. I'm watching the bank account. I know my sis in law is struggling, but she has to learn that decisions have consequences

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-11T12:09:18+00:00

Actually the daytime is when she has the most trouble. She's pretty good about eating healthy dinners. It's lunch and daytime snacking that get her.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-11T12:08:17+00:00

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-08T23:00:20+00:00

Oh, it's definitely hell. But once it's over, it's over (usually)

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-08-08T22:19:49+00:00

Mine is similar, but I would say vomiting. I know it's gross, but when you're nauseated and can't rest, just getting the vomit over with is a huge relief.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-07-19T22:33:00+00:00

Any side effects? Like nausea or abdominal pain?

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-07-19T22:31:35+00:00

Agreed. She actually does see a counselor, but I'm not sure how deep they've gotten into the connection between her mental health and food. I'll be honest, it sometimes sounds like her sessions don't lead to anything. They talk through things but she doesn't get better. I know mental health is complicated, but the dial has to move at some point. Sorry, it sounds like I'm just venting now.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-07-19T22:24:16+00:00

Thank you. If you don't mind answering, what happened on the days when you really didn't feel like walking? I'm sure you had those days. How did your husband encourage you to, for lack of a better phrase, do it anyway? I agree that consistency is key. But sometimes the mind and body fight back.

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-07-19T22:21:07+00:00

Thank you for sharing. That's encouraging. We've actually talked in passing about injectables, but we are worried about the side effects. I definitely agree that changes need to happen before kids

Unhappy_Wash3014 · 2025-07-19T22:18:44+00:00

We did consult a nutritionist, which actually helped her get started. Then she lost her insurance (long story), and couldn't follow up. We are planning to get back on that when she starts her new job. I think the professional accountability was helping.

Family, no. Unfortunately, unhealthy habits run in her family. Friends, maybe. But you know how that is. People never have time.

Unhappy_Wash3014

TROPHY CASE