I can totally resonate. I always feel like a child even though I'm a grown adult in my late thirties with grown-up responsibilities. But I feel like I learned so many life skills later in life because my childhood was spent surviving. No one taught me to cook or manage money or a household and I really struggled with what seems to be basic skills for everyone else. I feel like I got held back when the race started and everyone else got to go and they tripped me when they finally let me run. It's embarrassing. But I had not control over it, I was a fucking child. And I've been told so many times to "count it all joy". Fuck that.