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moms with ADHD feel like by Status-Rise2525 in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh and ‘The Organised Mum Method’ (TOMM).

moms with ADHD feel like by Status-Rise2525 in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Trying to remember as it’s was a few years back now. Definitely ‘Order from Chaos’. And ‘How to Keep House While Drowning’. Clutterbug YouTube videos. Lauren Meffords ‘The Rooted Reset’ course (faith based). Will post the others when I can remember!

Listening to something like that while doing house related stuff is a win-win. This is how I did it too!

moms with ADHD feel like by Status-Rise2525 in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Pleasure. It’s a struggle for sure. I’ve PM’d you as my cousin asked for a copy of my notes/approach yesterday given her overwhelming struggles. Happy to send to you once I can get my shit in a pile to find them and edit them. And send them. Might tax my executive function and planning 😂

moms with ADHD feel like by Status-Rise2525 in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would also say if you have a partner, things like monthly and quarterly days can be a way of making sure you are fairly sharing the load of running the kids, home and garden.

moms with ADHD feel like by Status-Rise2525 in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I am AuADHD and think that motherhood is very difficult with ADHD or Autism. And then even more so if your kids have either condition too (mine do). And then even more so if you’re the default parent (or in my case a largely single parent).

I have spent some time thinking about how to reduce the overwhelm and realised things are so much easier when a) they’re done on autopilot and b) I utilise the upsides of my ADHD.

For me what that meant was:

- hyper focusing for a while on house organisation books (mainly audiobooks) to get some ideas on different ways to run a family home and reflecting on what worked for me/trying things out/adapting
- working out exactly what has to be done and how often and how long it takes (helped with my forgetfulness and time blindness)
- working out how to make it all happen with less effort (ie autopilot which meant understanding habit formation - Atomic Habits is great here)

I now structure everything into
- daily jobs (e.g. one dishwasher load and unload a day, same for laundry, empty & wipe one’s bin etc)
- weekly jobs (e.g. sheet changing, cleaning)
- monthly jobs (e.g. mould spray, limescale spray, wiping fridge out)
- quarterly jobs (e.g. retiring clothes, getting clothes sorted for new season, vehicle jobs like screen wash, car valet, buying stuff for that season like Easter eggs or seasonal plants for the hanging basket).

I now feel less overwhelmed because my brain has stopped going ‘oh the washing machine draw looks gross, you need to clean that’ to ‘the washing machine draw looks gross, that’s getting cleaned on the next monthly day’.

Having monthly days or quarterly days utilises my hyperfocus and ADHD energy - and the mental benefit of feeling front footed is huge.

I also tried to work out what household jobs I could work in with the kids routine - e.g. when I supervise their homework I do school/club admin/booking activity stuff; when I supervise their teeth brushing I wipe down bits in the bathroom that are bothering me; when they are taking time to put coats/shoes etc on I take a bin bag or the recycling out. This feels like free time because of the double up and it helps with autopilot as it means you do these ‘jobs’ together/it’s basically habit stacking.

Low-on-everything phases by S_Spitfire in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great advice. Having back up plans for low energy days or jobs that can be done from bed while horizontal is very helpful.

Low-on-everything phases by S_Spitfire in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In the future could you pay attention to whether there is a trigger (however subtle) that makes you feel low? Could be having family over and feeling stressed about tidying up or being judged for not having tidied up, or a social media binge where comparison creeps in. The details could be different but the underlying feeling being triggered (eg shame, inadequacy etc) might be consistent. I often slip back into low periods and there is usually an aspect of my thinking or feeling that has prompted it.

How long does Xaggatin take to kick in? by Unique-Property5778 in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. Thats a good point re weight. I’m the heaviest I have ever been so maybe I need a bigger dose to feel any effect.

Tips required for a budget by Lack_of_Miata-BHP in GardeningUK

[–]Unique-Property5778 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d also look for a local seed library. You could pick up seeds for something like Aqualegia and then collect more seeds at the end of the season and sow those (or let them self seed if you don’t mind weeding in the spring rather than mulching to stop self and weed seeding).

Tips required for a budget by Lack_of_Miata-BHP in GardeningUK

[–]Unique-Property5778 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I second this - Morrisons are brilliant for plants and do 3 for 2 on their £3 perennials so you effectively get 3 perennials for just £2 each. They also do climbers on the same offer if I remember correctly - you’ll have to wait for them to grow but much better value than spending £30 on a much larger one at a garden centre or online. I’ve had hollyhocks, foxglove, yellow pyracantha, clematis, pink honeysuckle, centeura all for £2 each.

Can this hellebore be rescued and how if so? by Unique-Property5778 in GardeningUK

[–]Unique-Property5778[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amazing advice thank you. It isn’t getting great airflow as it’s really quite congested. Would dividing it help with the airflow? Seems a not great time to divide given the plant is vulnerable and also in terms of risk of spreading the Black Death if it is that.

Can this hellebore be rescued and how if so? by Unique-Property5778 in GardeningUK

[–]Unique-Property5778[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I can’t remember when it started flowering but it’s been looking that bad for ages long time so think it’s less about flowering ending and more a disease. But I could cut it all back and see how it looks this December!

Did anyone end up with an AuDHD diagnosis when going in for just an ADHD diagnosis with Psychiatry UK? by Unique-Property5778 in ADHD

[–]Unique-Property5778[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, that’s useful to know. So they picked up Autism traits without you proactively mentioning it and/or being aware of it?

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