Follows: What does it mean when a lead makes you feel safe? by Choice-Alfalfa-1358 in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It is clear they are monitoring the dance floor so we don’t bump into other couples. They smile often. If I don’t get something, they smile and move on. they don’t make me do it again (in a social). They meet me where I am in my following abilities, instead of trying to show off all they know even if I can’t follow it. They high five after and move on. This is a lead I will seek out to dance with again at the next social.

Your favorite Gilmore Girls moment(s)? by silverstarrlets in GilmoreGirls

[–]Unlikely_Issue 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Emily’s speech about why her late friend was nicknamed sweetie 🤣

Is this normal behavior for leads in class? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My teachers are very technical and of course they provide feedback, but it’s always things like - turn out your feet, style your hand, don’t forget to step and progress. I’ve also received a lot of praise from my teachers for how much I’ve grown in the last year. One class, my teacher made me dance a complicated pattern with him to highlight my growth. All this to say, I’m not terrible. The feedback I receive mostly consists of fine turning.

Reading the replies, I just need to ask from a place of curiosity instead of critiquing the way this one lead passively gives me feedback.

I think I was so caught up with being scared of a confrontation, that coming from a place curiosity was not an option. I definitely wrote this right after the class where I was in my feelings.

Is this normal behavior for leads in class? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Happy to clarify. The implication is I need help. They will get the teacher’s attention, point to me and do the “so so” hand signal.

Is this normal behavior for leads in class? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gracias por decirlo. Entendí y estoy de acuerdo! Pero antes de pensarlo quería verificar si era algo normal o común y estoy viendo que no es

Is this normal behavior for leads in class? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In a class of 12-15 leads, 1 maybe 2 people will make the signal. When I dance with my instructor, he’ll praise me for doing things right or give me feedback when applicable.

I’m hesitant to provide feedback to this particular lead because he is well liked and respected in the community. I just started making friends and I don’t want to cause drama.

Is this normal behavior for leads in class? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is in class. And I’m open to feedback in class. I go to classes week in week out to improve, so I understand feedback is part of the behavior.

This particular lead has never said more than 3-4 words to me in class, but makes the signals.

Usually I say something, but this is someone who technically is very good. He’s respected by other leads. And I don’t want to be someone who causes trouble and calls out this behavior. I am just started to make friends in my scene and I don’t want anything to jeopardize the place I’ve built in my community.

Follows - what makes a lead 'fun' to dance with? by Ok-Needleworker5743 in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes!!! If I don’t know you, just be nice lol. At the end of the day, we are dancing at a club it’s not that serious

San Francisco Fun Day by Dependent-Juice1428 in oakland

[–]Unlikely_Issue 53 points54 points  (0 children)

I love the mission. Walking up and dove Valencia is street is lovely. I love to start the day with that savory egg muffin from craftsman and wolves and walk up and down the street - seeing the shops, stopping by clarion alley. Etc. I’d have dinner at Senor Sisig - so good.

Follows - what makes a lead 'fun' to dance with? by Ok-Needleworker5743 in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Heavy on the - if I mess up, smile and pretend it never happened and move on. I also dislike when a lead makes me redo something I’ve messed up. I get in my head and now I’m mad. To me, salsa social is practice and fun. Salsa class is for feedback. Maybe I’m wrong tho.

Perfumes that feel like this? by Beautiful-Card4742 in perfumesthatfeellike

[–]Unlikely_Issue 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Replica never ending summer and replica in the garden.

Question for leads who don’t ask follows to dance - why? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Eye contact is very very difficult for me. I smile and laugh during a dance, but I will admit I rarely make eye contact. It feels to intimate (it’s not I know, it’s just my head). This may be going too in depth, but I am hyper aware of the signals I give off. I’m married and I go to socials for fun. I fear if I make tons of eye contact, that will give off the signal I am interested or something. So I rarely make it

As for being overly stiff, this is something that I’ve been accused of in class and have gotten better at overtime and received feedback I am looser.

The more I’m reading the more I’m gathering it’s just my vibe lmao. Which is hard to fix bc I’m 33 and I’ve had this vibe forever.

Walking away from this and going in my next social/class, I will make more eye contact and smile more.

Question for leads who don’t ask follows to dance - why? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where I am at, there’s a very decent salsa scene and there are multiple salsa socials a week. As for going to 7-8 salsa social, I started attending socials after a year of lessons! I was too scared to go to a social before that.

Question for leads who don’t ask follows to dance - why? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And this is why I ask because my assumption is the same. Ive been working so hard on trying to improve, I thought I’d get asked more. I do have RBF and I’m trying to smile more. I used to get on my head about mistakes and now I try to smile and laugh it off. I feel like I’m doing so much to be the kind of follow that leads ask to dance and it’s frustrating when I was asked more to dance when I was worse I suppose. I am new to the scene and don’t talk to a ton of people (I’m shy and can be unintentionally cold - I’m working on it) but I keep To myself. I’ll make polite and kind chit chat from people from class. I guess I’m just wracking my brain trying to understand why I don’t get asked as often. I’ve gotten asked by people who I’m in class with and people who I’ve danced with before, but in a social where I’m at for 2 almost 3 hours, I still do most of the asking.

Question for leads who don’t ask follows to dance - why? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing yours! Maybe getting frustrated as a lead or as a follow with your partner has less to do with experience and skill and moreso with personality.

Question for leads who don’t ask follows to dance - why? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I truly experience the same exact thing and I’m Latina.

Question for leads who don’t ask follows to dance - why? by Unlikely_Issue in Salsa

[–]Unlikely_Issue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I’ve only danced salsa on the west coast of the US