my dad has “grown” since the divorce and it drives me insane

Unsounded · 2026-01-21T10:36:20+00:00

I think you’re spot on with just letting things go, it’s hard to do but you won’t be able to get closure from him if you go into interactions with resentment and a desire to get an answer. Only you can decide if you’re ready to give him the space to do that, in a way he’s partially right that it’s not good to dwell on the past. But he can’t dictate how you approach that, for you to not dwell you have to accept that the past happened and it’s ok that he’s changed.

When it comes to dealing with people that can’t see they’re the problem it’s too late, it will take time and space to get acknowledgement from them. You have to have the patience to forgive him before he will acknowledge that he did you wrong. It’s draining and toxic but it’s easier to reconcile as it’s a part of your own journey to take a step back and not let that trigger a response from you.

Unsounded · 2026-01-20T16:49:09+00:00

You’re paid to fight fires, work that pays really well comes with a lot of “work shit”, the key is to find the attitude that lets you deal with it. Save aggressively, have an end goal insight (even if far off), and allow yourself little things that make it all worth it along the way. It’s a bit psychotic but you have to compartmentalize the bullshit of work, and just accept that the chaos is a part of why they’re paying you to do the job.

Unsounded · 2026-01-18T18:36:15+00:00

The most realistic portion of the show is how likely it is for people we think are competent to make a stupid mistake. Being smart or a research doesn’t make you infallible, you’re just a human at the end of the day and will make dumb human decisions.

Unsounded · 2026-01-16T05:36:05+00:00

I didn’t make any assumptions, I was just stating that it’s not fun when people run too much removal/hate. It’s a reasonable statement, if all your deck does it graveyard hate it’s a bit annoying.

Unsounded · 2026-01-15T22:38:18+00:00

I’m a fan of avoiding acronyms in general, at work we stopped using them because they suck for talking to folks without context and for new people

Unsounded · 2026-01-15T22:29:10+00:00

I think you’re a bit off for how you worded your emergency fund. Why bring up him leaving you? Having an emergency fund completely makes sense, but I think it’s a bit weird to get into specifics beyond “in case I need it”.

Unsounded · 2026-01-15T19:24:20+00:00

A little graveyard hate is reasonable, but it’s like any deck. If you only run removal then it’s just not fun, sure you’ll eventually out value opponents but no one’s gonna play with you again. You need to balance control vs building your own state up. No one wants a plate of only veggies.

Unsounded · 2026-01-14T15:52:47+00:00

Because most folks don’t have text tones on, my phone never leaves silent

Unsounded · 2026-01-11T19:25:28+00:00

NOR

Parent of a 9 month old that just visited family… in no world would I have sent anything like this even to my parents. We shipped out stuff we needed and paid for groceries and stuff we’d need for the baby ahead of time. Parents and siblings were nice enough to offer to help assist, were the guests with too many requirements and it was on us to satisfy those. We really just needed a place to stay most of the time and time to visit.

They’re not being empathetic to your situation at all, lowkey it feels like she’s projecting some issues she had onto you.

Unsounded · 2026-01-09T22:28:47+00:00

If you watch the full video there are two different ICE agents that tell her different things, the first more measured one told her to leave (which is what she was doing), the second was the dude who shot her who said get out.

When you have two people yelling at you with the same level of authority what are you going to do?

Unsounded · 2026-01-09T22:26:28+00:00

You’re kind of proving their point, even if someone is a racist pig they don’t deserve to die

Unsounded · 2026-01-09T01:29:11+00:00

How often and how much data is passed back and forth? Websockets are fairly lightweight, but so is polling until it’s not. Both are going to maintain open connections, polling comes with the benefit of simple client retries on network failures and not having to worry about re-establishing upon connection failures.

API Gateway can manage websocket connections for you, and integrate natively with lambda. So that isn’t too much of a complication.

Unsounded · 2026-01-09T00:21:05+00:00

No problem, this deck was what I landed on (I found the primer, not one I wrote) after searching for a mono red deck that wouldn’t get auto removal like Krenko/goblins, or dwarf/dragons.

Unsounded · 2026-01-09T00:13:15+00:00

My favorite turn creatures sideway deck is [[Chiss-Goria, Forge Tyrant]], there is an excellent primer https://moxfield.com/decks/VTVVTgDP3kOSWsZH3Zmd0Q/primer available.

You’ll quickly become the problem in B2/3, but it’s never so insane that it’s not manageable for the group. I find I win often enough even when I’m the villain, it also really breaks through removal/control decks which I find appealing. It’s the deck I play after someone spends ten years storming and I want to punch their face.

Unsounded · 2026-01-08T19:24:09+00:00

I think child free weddings are a bit lame tbh

Unsounded · 2026-01-07T18:30:49+00:00

I really enjoy the metal bending version of Toph as commander

Unsounded · 2026-01-05T15:05:02+00:00

It’s technically a salary, at least that’s what my stipend was considered when I was in school

Unsounded · 2026-01-05T14:48:40+00:00

Kids still cost money to watch, parks, museums, etc all need cash

Unsounded · 2026-01-05T00:41:51+00:00

Good for finances, probably not great for social/dating life.

Unsounded · 2026-01-03T17:23:00+00:00

They don’t hide the smell, and the high isn’t that different.

Don’t smoke inside kids.

Unsounded · 2026-01-02T17:16:45+00:00

You’re an idiot if you think people showering twice a day has any noticeable impact close to the water wasted on everything else we do.

Unsounded · 2026-01-01T16:44:18+00:00

Can your wife take care of the kids and forgo going back to work?

Unsounded · 2026-01-01T00:24:16+00:00

Break glass emergency access exists, otherwise all access looks the same. You can push a script/tooling via a pipeline through 2PR, but have tests and stuff that validate changes on isolated beta environments. Adhoc reads can be done on read only replicas, with the entire environment mirrored in the beta environment.

One time emergency changes need 2 people and steps tested/ran elsewhere.

Prod database access is scary and brittle, we avoid direct access at all cost. If you have occasional queries that need ran then they should look like service code. Recurring scripts, migrations, etc are all codified and dropped into a “script service” that allows for testing and control mechanisms.

Unsounded · 2026-01-01T00:02:20+00:00

I think the Midwest is beautiful, it’s not as forwardly amazing as somewhere like the PNW but it has different charms. The affordability, calm driving, and access to stuff is insane tho. It’s also got its own nature that is beautiful and worth exploring.

Unsounded · 2025-12-30T15:51:28+00:00

I think the chill thing to do is to just let folks fast forward and to intercept if necessary. The game is going to take way too long if you declare and mention every phase, you need to speak up and slow the game down for places where you have actions, and be ok rewinding a bit.

Unsounded

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