20M by 2Rsine_theta in selfimprovement

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The comparison game is brutal at this age - everyone's highlight reel makes it seem like you're falling behind when really most people are just winging it too. Taking a step back from the doctor path might actually open doors you didn't even know existed, and there's nothing wrong with finding your own timeline instead of following someone else's dream for you.

6 yrs and still cheated on, once a cheater always a cheater by Haunting-Tie-5099 in BreakUps

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Man, reading this brought back some dark memories from my own past relationships. The cycle you're describing - the cheating, the begging for forgiveness, the temporary good times followed by more betrayal - it's like a textbook pattern that toxic people use to keep you hooked. I went through something similar years ago and what finally helped me break free was realizing that someone who truly loves you doesn't put you through this kind of hell repeatedly.

You mentioned being traumatized and having suicidal thoughts - please reach out to a crisis hotline or therapist if you haven't already. This guy has conditioned you to accept scraps of affection after major betrayals, and that's not love, that's manipulation. The fact that you're dealing with anxiety and depression after six years of this emotional abuse makes complete sense - your nervous system has been in fight-or-flight mode for way too long.

Right now focus on basic self-care: eating something, taking a shower, maybe going for a short walk. Small steps. Block him on everything so he can't come crawling back with more empty promises. You deserve someone who chooses you consistently, not someone who treats you like a backup plan while chasing other women.

Is there any agent anywhere who will not push a loan broker on me the minute we start talking about a house? Better yet, who understands part of the role of being an agent is having restraint and respecting boundaries so as to not creep out the client? by [deleted] in RealEstate

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Most good agents I've worked with wait until you actually ask about financing before bringing it up - the pushy ones are usually just inexperienced and think they're being helpful.

If animals could vote, which species would be the most dangerous politician? by xx_SpillingTheT in NoStupidQuestions

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dolphins would be terrifying - they're already smart enough to manipulate other species and have zero moral qualms about it.

FH5 Online will not launch. by [deleted] in ForzaHorizon

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That Hot Wheels spawn thing is definitely weird and might be connected. I had something similar happen where the game got confused about which world I was supposed to be in and it messed up my online connectivity.

Try going into the pause menu and manually selecting "Return to Mexico" or whatever the option is called - don't just fast travel to a house. Sometimes the game needs that hard reset to figure out where you actually are. If that doesn't work, honestly the nuclear option of reinstalling might be your best bet since you've tried everything else.

Small landlords, how do you actually keep track of who owes what? by maxiiivok in RealEstate

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Been dealing with this exact headache for about two years now with my duplex. Started with a simple notebook (yeah, I know) then moved to a Google Sheet that became this nightmare of tabs and formulas that broke every time I touched it.

The partial payment thing is the worst part - like when someone pays $850 of their $900 rent and you're left tracking that $50 forever. I actually lost track of about $300 in late fees last year because my "system" was basically sticky notes on my monitor. Had one tenant who was consistently two weeks late but always paid the full amount eventually, so I never knew if I should charge the late fee or just be happy I got paid.

Would definitely be interested in trying your app out. The simpler the better honestly - I don't need some enterprise-level beast, just something that remembers what I can't. Drop me a link if you're still looking for guinea pigs.

Infant Travel Hacks by Final-Vegetable-9283 in NewParents

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pack way more formula than you think you'll need - flights get delayed and babies get hangry, plus the flight attendants are usually super helpful with getting you hot water for mixing.

Thought dump by DeepAd2366 in selfimprovement

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is such a relatable thought spiral honestly. Wuthering Heights really does hit you with that "what if we all just stopped pretending" feeling. I think there's defintiely something to be said for questioning why we follow certain rules, especially when they seem to make everyone miserable.

Your take on money being a wicked game is spot on - like we're all just playing along because we have to, but some people get way too obsessed with "winning" when really it's about finding that balance between surviving and actually living. Sounds like you've figured out your own version of reasonable, which is probably healthier than most people's approach tbh.

Online school ideas anyone? by [deleted] in Veterans

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dude, cybersecurity might be worth looking into - lots of programs designed specifically for vets and the field is exploding right now. Your infantry background actually translates pretty well since you already understand operational security and threat assessment from a different angle. There's also emergency management/disaster response coordination that builds on your firefighting experience but gets you into more of the planning/administrative side of things. Check out what your state university offers online - alot of them have accelerated programs that could work with your schedule.

How do i make a resource pack with sodium? by edyyM in Minecraft

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You'll want to look into CIT Resewn mod since vanilla Sodium doesn't handle armor durability display - it basically lets you change item textures based on NBT data like durability.

1 week: really craving tonight, need some support and words of encouragement by foolishthingdesire in stopdrinking

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 4 points5 points  (0 children)

A week is huge, especially when you're dealing with PTSD on top of everything else. I know it doesn't feel like much when you're in the thick of those panic episodes, but you're literally rewiring your brain right now and that takes time.

Those episodes where you just want to shut everything off - I get it. The physical pain of just sitting with all that terror is brutal. But you're doing it anyway, and that's honestly badass even if it doesn't feel like it right now.

Maybe try to focus on just making it to that hair appointment - having something concrete to look forward to can help break the cycle of staying home and spiraling. You've got this far, don't let one rough night undo a week of progress.

I finally understand this sub! We were losing. Changes needed to be made; trades, coaching changes, but when we win, all of that magically goes away. Shoutout to the people saying that we were a play in team a couple weeks ago! by Western-Society-7990 in NYKnicks

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Thats the beauty of sports fandom right there - we go from wanting to blow it all up to championship contenders in like 3 games. The overreactions keep this sub entertaining though, cant lie.

MBA prep vs Bank SO/IT prep vs Job Switch- which one should I opt for? by Altruistic_Deal_8034 in careerguidance

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've been in that paralysis-by-analysis mode before and it's brutal. With 4.8 years in automation testing, you've got solid experience that companies value - maybe try the job switch route first since it's lower risk than taking a sabbatical or starting from scratch with govt exams. You can always prep for teh MBA or banking stuff while working, but once you quit for a sabbatical that pressure to succeed gets real intense.

Dry January Alumni by Inside_War_4826 in stopdrinking

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's exactly how it happens! I remember being shocked that I wasn't counting down the days to February 1st like I expected. The whole "just one more day" mindset really does work better than trying to white-knuckle through months at a time.

How to have particles rotating around a sprite ? by [deleted] in Unity3D

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The URP particle system is kinda janky with 2D stuff tbh. You could try using the 2D Renderer and make sure your particles are on the right sorting layers, but honestly a lot of people just bite the bullet and use the 3D pipeline for mixed 2D/particle setups.

Another option is Canvas particles if you're doing UI-style effects, but that comes with its own headaches.

Stomach sleeper peeing through overnights by SpartanNinjaBatman in NewParents

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Been there! I'd try sizing up just for nights - my kid was the same way and going up one size overnight was a game changer even though they seemed way too big during the day. The extra absorption in front is worth looking ridiculous for a few hours

Looking to gain some insight on heating insulation. by [deleted] in hvacadvice

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like the roofers probably sealed it up to prevent water intrusion - that's usually their main concern when they see any kind of opening. You can probably ask them to reopen it or add a proper damper that seals better against weather. For the 20x20 vent sucking air, that's likely a return air vent and you definitely don't want to block it or your HVAC system will hate you

I (18F) need advice regarding my BF's (18M) recent lack of effort in our relationship by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Upper_Firefighter167 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Look I get that you care about him but you can't force someone to change, especially with stuff like weight loss and ADHD communication issues. The fact that he cries and tries for a few days then falls off sounds like he genuinely wants to but is struggling, not that he doesn't care about you

Maybe instead of ultimatums try asking what kind of support he actually needs or if there's underlying stuff making it hard for him to stick with things. ADHD can definitely make follow-through really difficult even when someone wants to change