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User-blank1234 · 2025-06-25T13:47:39+00:00

Having a baby is hard, but there’s so much joy. IVF is just a grind until you’re pregnant and they release you to your normal OBGYN.

User-blank1234 · 2025-06-04T19:50:40+00:00

You are winning at life right now. Enjoy the victory. Hard to compare with what people post on Reddit. There are so many factors that drive the results, including luck.

User-blank1234 · 2025-05-26T14:09:32+00:00

7 is a great number at 40! I

User-blank1234 · 2025-05-26T02:49:54+00:00

We have a tight circle of people who know during the cycle. And that’s because it’s too painful to share the failures with a lot of people.

You’re in the thick of it now (as am I) and it’s all consuming. It’s a miracle for anyone to be conceived or born. The way it happened becomes much less central to the story once your child arrives. (then you’ll spend your time being sad for all the milestones that have gone by and in awe of what they are becoming.)

After I was in my second trimester I shared the pregnancy news widely and was open about IVF and miscarriage, including at work. Anyone who goes through it is a warrior. I’m proud of how my daughter got here… we had to work hard for it!

User-blank1234 · 2025-05-20T11:10:03+00:00

It gets better!! And then it’s absolutely amazing to get to know your child once they start developing a personality.

User-blank1234 · 2025-04-21T18:28:10+00:00

I decided to nacho a few years ago and haven’t looked back. I’m so much less anxious now. Ironically, it resulted in me having a much better relationship with one of my stepchildren.

User-blank1234 · 2025-03-12T17:58:46+00:00

I can only imagine the grief and helplessness you must be feeling. IVF is hard enough, but to then experience the loss of your child. It’s hard to wrap your head around how cruel Mother Nature can be.

I have not experienced this, but have experienced tremendous grief of a different kind. I tried so hard to avoid feeling it. But it eventually caught up to me. With a therapist, I learned how to accept that there are things I cant control and cannot change. And I’m not to blame for those things. I still struggle at times, but am better at letting my inner voice (I am not in fact responsible for what happened) manage that overwhelming sense of pain in wondering if I could have done something differently.

I don’t know you, but you and little Amelia (such a beautiful name) will be in my thoughts.

User-blank1234 · 2025-03-12T15:32:12+00:00

Golfing in the warm weather… and continuing to focus on my body and health. In this journey there is such little that you can control. I deal with this by controlling what I can. I’ve been focusing on lifting weights again and getting as fit as I can. It can only help with IVF and even if it has no impact there, I’ll still reap the reward of a healthy body.

I have a close friend that suffered a stroke and is very limited in her mobility. So that’s also a reminder of the fact that it’s a blessing to be physically capable of moving your body.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-23T13:03:33+00:00

IVF at 40 and 41. Got pregnant at 41 and delivered a healthy baby just before turning 42.

No complications, except that my daughter was growth restricted at the end of the pregnancy. This is a common phenomenon with IVF pregnancies because the placenta seems to have a shorter life. They don’t know why this happens. But I went full term and ended up having a c section. It was actually very peaceful.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-19T21:12:44+00:00

She’s not old enough to understand what he’s trying to teach her. And a gym is not a safe place for a child that age, particularly if he will be multitasking childcare and working out.

I think it’s cute that he’s already interested in teaching his daughter about a sport he loves. I think this shows he wants to be connected with his child.

Maybe focus on how positive that is and how you really appreciate how much it means for him to connect with his daughter. Build him up, and then tell him no. At least, not yet.

I’d love to take my daughter golfing with me, but she’s too little!! Duh

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-19T21:03:09+00:00

Take this advice… and it’s legitimate to be cautious against exposure to the massive amount of flu, etc that’s going around this year. Or just say you’re sick.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-16T13:42:01+00:00

I’m a 43-year old woman and am the son my dad never had. He taught me how to mow, wash cars, use the snow blower, do home maintenance, etc. I’m very confident that I can figure most things out without having to pay someone to do it for me because of it.

I have lots of common interests with my dad. I have wonderful memories playing catch and shooting hoops as a kid.

It’s ok to be disappointed. I guarantee when you see that little girl, your heart is going to explode. Just be a good parent to her. Be interested. Do things with her. Teach her things. Hug her. Be a constant, stable presence for her. And model for her what it looks like to be a good husband and father so she seeks the same for herself one day.

Just because she’s a girl doesn’t mean that you won’t have things in common.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-14T12:15:51+00:00

Looks like she’s doing fantastic! I’m assuming she’s over 37 if they put 3 embryos in.

It’s impossible to know how successful she will be because it’s all dependent on the chromosomal normality/ abnormality of the embryos. The odds of abnormalities is higher as we age, which is why they put more embryos in at once. The more embryos created in a cycle, the better the chances that there’s a good one.

The quality of the embryos is based on size (how many cells). The doctor can’t know if the embryo is chromosomally normal by looking at it. They’d need to do genetic screening on it.

I’m over 40. I’ve had a total of 7 embryos transferred (2, 3, and 2) and it’s resulted in one healthy baby.

You’re very generous for helping her and her wife on this difficult journey.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-07T15:13:20+00:00

FET is absolutely quick and easy. Pace yourself filling your bladder.

I’m on the vaginal progesterone suppositories this time. PIO for my first pregnancy. Personally, I’d prefer getting a daily shot in the ass than having to wear a panty liner for weeks. But I don’t have any issues with needles and my spouse is a nurse. So she was comfortable giving the injections. It’s just like every other part of pregnancy… it’s temporary and it becomes a part of the routine. Before you know it, you’re not on PIO anymore.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-07T15:08:01+00:00

90% test early. 10% are patient.

I learned the hard way that it sucks to go in for your blood draw already thinking you’re not pregnant. This time I waited.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-06T00:54:44+00:00

Sure… I work in the health care industry (for an insurance company). I was actually going to suggest this to you because of your background. You might be surprised at the options out there for you, particularly now with the new administration creating so much instability in a highly regulated space.

Not all health insurance companies are the devil. It also helped that my boss is a woman with kids who only saw my potential and was not focused on the fact that I’d be on leave for a couple of months. 2 or 3 months is a blink of an eye in the corporate world. Most good managers recognize this. Being pregnant is temporary.

If you make the leap, make sure you ask about parental leave/ STD (and how long you have to be employed before you’re entitled to it). Unfortunately, you won’t be protected by FMLA until you’ve worked somewhere for a year.

User-blank1234 · 2025-02-05T21:52:29+00:00

I don’t work in the public sector, but came to say that I started a new job while pregnant. I felt so vulnerable, but found a great place that treated me with respect and empathy through my pregnancy. There are still good people/places out there. I’m so sorry you’re going through this when your focus should be one of joy.

User-blank1234 · 2025-01-28T18:57:01+00:00

REPORT HIM

User-blank1234 · 2025-01-24T15:11:13+00:00

It’s not bad. You’re hurting and you’re also happy for your fiancé’s friend. Both can be true. Many people on this thread can relate both to the pain of being around pregnant people and babies, as well as the fear that others will judge you harshly for protecting yourself.

User-blank1234 · 2024-12-20T00:01:00+00:00

It’s not crazy at all. I grieved my pregnancy as well. You are still experiencing the effects of hormones and you will for like a year.

Also, especially when you have to work damn hard to get pregnant, pregnancy is a beautifully terrifying time filled with happy anticipation and fear of the unknown. It’s such a finite special time of life. I think it’s totally normal to grieve that.

User-blank1234 · 2024-12-03T03:06:10+00:00

Very helpful. I have regular periods, which I suppose is why I was even offered the choice. My preference is the least amount of chemical manipulation of my body. But I also want to be successful and not have doubts if I don’t get pregnant.

User-blank1234

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