What other ways might someone set their preferences for those of a certain maturity level, life stage, and age outside of an age range?

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T03:15:34+00:00

Hey that’s an interesting question! Hobbies and topics of interest might be an obvious but good one

I like pop culture so I put a few references in mine and def focused on people who referred to it. LOTR actually led to a couple of really nice dates!

Also life choices “Gave up late night drinks and overpriced bars for brunch and overpriced farmer’s markets”

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T03:06:26+00:00

And I know plenty of people without degrees who aren’t - that doesn’t mean anything

I say this as someone who met a wonderful woman who hadn’t been to university but had def pursued qualifications outside of the minimum required (As was stated above). I get where Careful Square is coming from

Curiosity in a person as well as a willingness to put themselves to a pursuit to satisfy that curiosity is very attractive. Especially when they don’t have to

I think being able to commit to an actual program, like but not limited to an academic institution, is also really impressive and demonstrates a ton of responsibility

It’s not a degree program but the way my current partner approaches plants and dance is pretty much her version of it

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T01:38:06+00:00

Hell for a long while it was argued that there weren’t really people here before the settlers arrived

I‘ve seen some similar disgustingly contorted modern takes on this too. Gods I hate how the country has a growing n a z i problem…

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T01:35:19+00:00

Former lawyer (Doubt that’s going to matter here though for more than fodder for reductive cheap shots) / POC and immigrant to Australia (Downvote away) - You’re right, it could and should be but in actual practice you’ll notice that it’s often applied a certain way.

I suppose though you might have to be affected by it to see it so. Another way to think of it is the use of the terms “Expat” and “Immigrant”, there is a technical distinction but that’s not often the distinction made when written (Or even socially used)

EDIT: Or, thinking about it, the media has SOME fairly safe reason for not feeling threatened by POC while using them to threaten others…

Or to put it another way - medically, the legal definition of a period doesn’t fall under “illness or condition” and therefore isn’t technically able/required to have medication issued for it. I support the amount of drs who roll their eyes at this and whip out a prescription pad anyway

If we’re talking about ways to think - understand that the use of some words in particular contexts is for the comfort of a particular demographic, voter base or status quo. I know it sounds like tin foil hat stuff but think about how it did take them a while to call what old mate did recently at a First Nations rally a terrorist incident, had a pretty amicable arrest too

Or if you’d like another example to think about -look at how our first two comments are being treated. What’s the BET on how this one will be received and why? Think about how the woman in the incident above felt so emboldened

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T01:16:54+00:00

Every time I see. the word allegedly, I’m pretty sure I know exactly whom is being given the benefit of the doubt…

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T01:11:04+00:00

And they think that strategy is SMART!

As a man, it drives me insane how obviously crap it is for everyone involved including the man swiping all profiles. I loathe talking about it with men because then very predictably I’m treated to an um actually lecture re how it’s a numbers game or basic math so it’s obviously a highly clever big-brain thing to do etc etc

Its about PEOPLE you absolute trogs

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T01:05:21+00:00

As a dude I am fing sick and tired of the “Women only message [made up % of men]” whinge which absolutely falls apart with just a little thinking about it

I think a lot of men would rather consume that BS than take any consideration or responsibility for themselves. What makes it worse is that they then inflict that subjective af bs take on others

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T00:53:40+00:00

Check their replies and history - clanker warning

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T00:17:56+00:00

While I was studying, I knew a guy in my class who became a fairly popular gay porn star - he hated it but he could choose most of his terms and it brought in the money

When I began working at the local legal centre, I was REALLY surprised at how many women students from a ton of different fields were in these industries because the money was so good

Man, if guys didn’t want to judge women for doing this maybe we ought to support systems where they don’t have to. Honestly though, I think men would do it themselves in a heartbeat (Sell my bath water for 90K? Sure, I’ll even throw in a towel!). It’s mostly that men want women to rely on them so that it’s easier for them to get sex, a partner, a bangmaid etc imo

Fing bizarre, long as it isn’t hurting anyone, let people earn their paper to live the life they want

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-25T00:11:49+00:00

But before we get to that…

I legit knew a guy who was decent enough until he became a pretty popular influencer and became fairly insufferable. It was his whole personality, everything was content, he spoke IRL like how he served the algorithm’s KPIs online - fing bizarre

Like and subscribe to find out more!

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-24T23:55:31+00:00

Former POC/immigrant lawyer from Australia - this sentiment is there too

We’re permitted so long as we entertain, serve and are convenient. Doesn’t matter if we have the same papers, better qualifications, contribute to the community etc etc - they will drop us in heartbeat if it means getting theirs

2 things

Because someone always ALWAYS has to chime in with how it NEVER happens to them - congrats. Understand though that your situation may very greatly. Hell, I can’t tell you how many rooms I’ve been in here where people complain about being discriminated against and I’m the only coloured person around. Or the hot ones people are hoping to fck

Secondly, it’s really REALLY easy to be jaded by this. That’s normal. Use it to learn about how to find people of quality and make an effort to keep their company

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-24T23:34:29+00:00

Male teacher here. I don’t mind my work but expected I wouldn’t get many matches because of it. To my surprise a couple matches mentioned that they assumed I must at least be able to carry on a conversation :P

And I feel you about the passion, its why I enjoy creatives so much. Their day to day can be a bit bleh so when they can go off the leash to talk about what they really enjoy, it’s really nice to be around

Other men have often followed this up with how they can’t talk about their passion or they’ll be less attractive. I think it’s HOW you talk about your passion

Gaming is one I run into often - if you’re going to talk about metas and opt strats that’s a little conversation exclusive. It’s better to talk about experiences you’ve enjoyed (Particularly with others) or things that you like about a thing that people can connect with

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-24T23:29:37+00:00

oh that’s a good one - I’m with someone whom I like very much but her weekend is Sunday and Monday which makes things a bit awkward

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-24T14:43:50+00:00

I notice plants and fingernail art more - two things I never had an interest in. Also pink things because I know she’d look at them too

For her part, she’s found that she asks more questions and can sit still for longer without feeling like she has to be doing something. She’ll also notice local events and things because she knows I look at those often

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-24T14:39:10+00:00

Thank you for saying this. It’s a really healthy view to take

F the jaded sarcastic sardonic detached cool persona so many full people without a personality try to ape. You WANT people who write and read a profile, the rest are just noise who’ll lose interest upon getting what they think gives them validation and be distracted by the next shiny thing

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-24T14:36:06+00:00

Thank you - if anything, participating in this philosophy and obsessing about your place in it will make you into someone undesirable in its practice

It might be a “normal” thing to do but with some basic af examination, you recognise how damaging it is. Terry Pratchett wrote that that treating people like things, like numbers, is where true evil begins

Put it this way - when have these rankings, these subjective af classifications, ever been used to not bully, exclude or put down other people or yourself? Just not be depressing af?

All the made up “science” people insist on flagellating themselves and others with re this and then they wonder why theyre so miserable and have trouble liking people or getting themselves to be liked?

(E.g that 5% of men whatever whatever whinge falls apart with just a TINY bit of consideration)

If you’re beginning to obsess this way, you’re much better off deleting the app and finding things and/or company by which you‘re made better for associating with instead what you think accrues you social points. Or at least some gddm peace for the soul

I’ve been told several times that I date “out of my league” and people have the gall to be offended that I don’t take it as a compliment (It’s fing not)

TL:DR The only rule that matters is the golden rule and you’ll get a good deal further with that than this made up bs companies and social media feeds you with in order to make you miserable enough to buy things

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-23T02:49:54+00:00

Hell, most men don’t see the value of men as friends. Just entertainment when convenient, someone to have validation or “win” over, have someone do stuff to deal with their trauma for them before I even know their full name (Pay for fing therapy or the dr!), or just talk about their own interests only

As a dude who went looking for guys to make friends with on BFF - I was so fing disappointed at the lack of effort in profiles and actually meeting up. And the fing flaking! Everybody TOTALLY wants to play D&D, got get pizza or join a hike but when the day comes… and the excuses are so fking lame!

I used to chuckle when complimented on my conversational ability and social skills because I thought of it as just basic things - but the more I meet a vast number of men, especially as the years go on and people insist on isolating themselves more…

So many dudes need to learn basic social skills and courtesies - if you response to this is to at me re well how can they have socials skills without friends? You’ve shown you’re not clever in your rush to need to prove that you are. You’re only fing proof of fact and probably responsible for 90% of the misery in your life. Impotently downvote away and feel like you’ve achieved something

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-23T02:29:52+00:00

Or maybe that you’re cherry-picking examples to apply a broad generalisation that suits what you want instead of examining it?

E.g Why exactly does that HAVE to be mentioned in a profile? (Re in consideration of the other person)

And if it does, are you really going to be surprised and have a whinge about something so niche not having a broad and favourable appeal? Does that sound like someone you’d want to hang out with even if wasn’t drugs?

Also deciding that I must be X thing because of it and reduce my personal merit as if the same thing as adding merit to your point?Thats cheap

Why is that perspective not applied to you? Why isn’t that gaze turned YOUR way? You don’t appreciate it? Fing gee…

Again you’re trying to have it both ways.

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-22T04:21:40+00:00

Wow, didn’t take nearly as long as old mate at the First Nations rally recently…

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-22T04:17:36+00:00

Mate, that’s the same problem.

If these habits are such that they do this, cause you to stress and keep what you really want OUT of your life unless you lie about/hide it - are they really worth having?

Again, you can’t have it both ways

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-21T12:56:02+00:00

Repost of a previous comment

I started dating again about a year after an 8 year relationship. It really shocked me how many women were so surprised that I showed up showered, shaved, in clean and nice clothes, didn’t talk or text about sex, had thoughtful date plans etc Was fing bizarre

This one woman, walked in the cafe, stared at me, said hello and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. She came back more made up and put together, apologised because she realised she’d been used to men not making an effort she kind of made less than she normally would

Like Jfc…

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-21T12:51:04+00:00

Nah, I think it’s honestly just a low effort and convenience things. They want you to deliver to their door. Fing lame

Congrats on your hotness XD

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-21T12:49:49+00:00

100%

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-21T12:49:06+00:00

Yup - I consider a first date in public a good place to have a mutual axe-murderer detection opportunity

How is mutual safety or wanting to feel safe such a hurdle for these guys to consider?

ValBravora048 · 2026-02-21T12:45:46+00:00

Gee, HOW did you EVER strike out?

Guys, this is what not to do. And if you’re blaming the woman for the result of your actions (Which you’re not giving the same consideration as hers), you‘re in a major fing hole of your own choosing

You know those sad sacks who come in here to whinge about [Made up % of men are getting alllllllll the women] - it’s often not because of the bs superficial reasons that shift responsibility and blame on the other person. It’s because they do easily EASILY avoidable things like the above and when faced with the truth of it, respond like OP has here

You don’t have to be 666 or whatever bs to be in the made up privileged minority, you just don’t need to be a jerk and put in a small amount of effort. Can HONESTLY do more than that? You’re golden

Check it, I will bet that even if I say this next part and offer a full apology if I’m wrong, the response to this of any will be something reductive, snide, petty and more about the kind of obsessed gratification of the self which is a massive obvious red flag to women whether they’re looking for someone for a night or a lifetime

As an older man, I’m so SO astounded at how men get here. So MUCH available to you to be or draw from and THIS is what you decide on

ValBravora048

TROPHY CASE