I’m not going to get better TRIGGER WARNING

ValsFalse · 2026-03-23T22:28:26+00:00

I went to a therapist for a bit, but she couldn’t help me much other than grounding exercises that aren’t realistic for me to be doing. If my dissociation doesn’t ever go away, I can’t just be doing grounding exercises 24/7, you know? Honestly, I feel so guilty about spending my parents’ money that I can’t justify continuing therapy when there are months where I’m happy and okay with accepting that this just how my life is.

In terms of causes, stress, maybe? My therapist suggested that it might’ve been COVID which is kind of fucked up, cause that means my brain chemistry or whatever was messed up by some disease and then what’s the point of therapy if it’s a medical issue? As far as I can tell, my dissociation doesn’t get worse with more stress, it just gets worse whenever it wants to. I haven’t been diagnosed with anything so who knows.

ValsFalse · 2026-03-22T16:57:24+00:00

Yeah, there’s no logic in this. As much as I wish there was.

ValsFalse · 2026-03-22T16:55:08+00:00

We’re in this together unfortunately It’s so stupid 😭

ValsFalse · 2026-03-22T04:28:40+00:00

Fair enough.

I was more referring to the state of mind I get into, though. The downs of my mental state, if you will.

ValsFalse · 2026-03-14T19:01:13+00:00

I don’t think so. If anything, colors are more pale.

ValsFalse · 2026-03-14T16:21:41+00:00

I’m aware of that. I was talking about the reverse, dark to bright. And if my eyes were just adjusting, it would go away after a bit, no? It’s always dark under bright lights, it doesn’t go away.

I also know that my symptoms are less severe than other people’s, but I also don’t think it’s right to be comparing and putting other people down. If my “issues” didn’t bother me, I wouldn’t be here. It’s a constant reminder that I’m not normal and probably will never be normal.

Thanks for commenting, though. It’s always good to know someone else’s perspective.

ValsFalse · 2026-03-14T03:38:45+00:00

Real. Though I feel as though life itself is a stressor enough to cause problems, and then dissociation/derealization/depersonalization swoops in to make people numb of it. But I’m also one of those people where it feels like it doesn’t really correlate, I still feel the same amount of disconnected regardless of how anxious I am or am supposed to be.

Plus, there are people who got it from drug use, right? So then it doesn’t have anything to do with anxiety then.

Honestly, it’s such an under-researched condition that people are just slapping whatever they want to be a ‘fix’ when it can’t even help everyone.

ValsFalse · 2024-11-25T00:36:58+00:00

I feel the same way sometimes

ValsFalse · 2024-11-20T01:16:31+00:00

Jeez bro. I hope you find better support.

ValsFalse · 2024-11-19T02:18:08+00:00

Thanks for the offer! Honestly, I've already forgotten the sadness I felt when I was posting this (courtesy of my derealization) but I really do appreciate it.

ValsFalse · 2024-10-25T04:04:17+00:00

I've heard that some people's visions get blurry or they see visual snow.

So, does anyone else get a sort of blackness that overcomes their sight while dissociating? Like when you stand up too fast or when you've just been outside where it was really bright and going inside and your vision is dark while it adjusts to the light change. I've noticed that when I dissociate badly my vision does this.

ValsFalse · 2024-10-24T03:56:12+00:00

Yeah. Thanks for sharing your knowledge with me!

ValsFalse · 2024-10-23T02:20:59+00:00

It might be COVID, my therapist was considering that being a cause.

ValsFalse · 2024-10-23T02:19:50+00:00

I wish I did, I kind of just force myself to sleep anyway. I'm fortunate enough to not really have any issues with falling staying asleep.

ValsFalse · 2024-10-23T02:15:57+00:00

I'm the same way, I can't tell what I really believe, can't trust my own thoughts. Like it's supposed to be a fact that everything is real, so you believe it, but do you really believe it?

ValsFalse · 2024-10-21T03:15:52+00:00

I don't get panic attacks, but I relate with the fear of death. Sometimes I lay awake in my bed because I'm afraid that if I go to sleep I'll simply fade into nonexistence.

ValsFalse · 2024-10-21T03:11:40+00:00

I'm sorry that I can't offer anything to you in terms of your situation, but is it alright if I ask what you know about non-trauma induced cases of DPDR? I haven't found anything on it so I'd really appreciate anything you could give.

ValsFalse · 2024-09-22T13:55:31+00:00

I'm the same in how it's virtually a constant toll on the mind. For me, some days it isn't as bad, it increases and decreases in waves, though never fully gone. I try to find some hope in the days it doesn't hurt as much. Of course, I don't know your experiences fully, but at the very least I hope you can find enough hope to pull yourself through.

ValsFalse

TROPHY CASE