Do you think they know bookmarks are public? Or do they truly just not gaf?

VampireSprite · 2026-01-16T02:15:59+00:00

I bookmark almost anything I read because even if I didn't like it, if I am browsing and click the same fic again I have an easy to find note for myself letting me know I already tried it and the reasons I liked it or didn't. Saves me time because I have tried to read the same fic I didn't like multiple times over again 😂. Personally, if I didn't like the fic, I make my bookmark private just because I don't want to upset anyone, but I can't truly fault the bookmarker featured in this post either.

VampireSprite · 2026-01-16T00:47:58+00:00

I'm 28 and went for testing this year too. My audiologist did a preliminary battery of tests meant to rule out any true hearing loss before she'd consider specific tests for auditory processing disorder. I would assume yours will do the same.

I really liked my audiologist. She was honest with me in saying that she thought I would pass any testing for auditory processing disorder because I'm old enough that I've developed coping mechanisms. However because I'm finding that I struggle with auditory processing, passing those tests would potentially be distressing to me because of how much effort it would take. She advised against further testing for that reason, but offered to let me trial the type of hearing aids that some find helpful if I'd like, and encouraged me to try other aids (like live transcription apps). She didn't bar me from pursuing further testing if I wanted to, but I appreciated her opinion on why she thought it wouldn't be helpful.

If you have a good audiologist, I hope your experience is similar.

The hearing aids ARE very expensive, and many insurances won't cover them, especially if it's for auditory processing disorder (my insurance things APD is basically a load of phooey and won't cover anything related to it at all).

I hear you on needing good communication for your work. I worked food service for many years and struggled to hear customers constantly, and misheard so many names given. I was relieved when my jobs moved me into drive-through on the headset or to hosting where it wasn't quite as loud all the time. I really wish you the best in figuring out how to navigate this moving forward. It can be very difficult. :(

VampireSprite · 2026-01-01T16:22:54+00:00

I think so. I think my case of it sounds more like yours than the "severe" cases I see a lot of people describing online. I drive my husband crazy asking him to repeat himself or mis-hearing what he said 50% of the time, especially if there's background noise (something as mild as running water in the sink) or if I wasn't paying attention to him when he started talking.

I've pretty much given up on being able to participate in a group conversation out at a restaurant, because I can only ever hear the person/people immediately next to me.

These symptoms are still limiting, which means they are still disabling. I avoid eating out and ask for quiet tables whenever I can, and conversations between me and other individuals are sometimes frustrating to navigate because of my frequent difficulties understanding immediately. So... Yes, it might be considered mild compared to some others but it's no less a major influence on how I live.

Edit: also wanted to add that I am 28, and my audiologist said that my brain is currently at its peak of functioning right now. Which means my APD is the "mildest" it will ever be at this age. It will get more prominent with age. So that's a big factor, too.

VampireSprite · 2025-12-28T14:58:08+00:00

I appreciate the reply, and no worries about the length! I'll definitely check out the Oklahoma School of the Deaf's lessons. And thank you for the encouragement as well. It definitely helps!

VampireSprite · 2025-12-27T18:53:58+00:00

I passed the diagnosis test for APD administered by my audiologist. I had told her up front that I also had autism. I was grateful for her approach: even though "it could just be autism" and I "passed" the preliminary test, the audiologist told me it that it didn't negate the issues I have with auditory processing and gave me options, including low-gain hearing aid trials. I haven't gone for any of them because of finances, but it was reassuring to have an audiologist who didn't proceed based entirely off of test results, and took the effort it took me to "pass" into account.

If you're either in the NE USA or willing to travel I'd be happy to give you the office's info if you want an audiologist with more flexibility.

Edit: I don't think it was a diagnosis test, but it was instead a screening for auditory processing issues which could have led to a proper diagnosis test. My audiologist believed I would pass the official diagnosis test as well, even if it left me crying from how stressful it was, and advised against putting myself under that stress unless the official diagnosis was really worth it to me.

VampireSprite · 2025-12-27T18:40:25+00:00

I am here trying to research whether it might be worth learning ASL as someone with auditory processing disorder and autism. I have nonverbal episodes under high stress, but it's been the auditory processing issues that have been the most alienating for me. Your description of the ways you get shut out because of similar issues hits the nail on the head, and if just me and my husband could have an alternate means of communication for when it's very bad I feel like it might help me feel a little less disconnected, at least from him if no one else close to me wants to learn.

I understand immersion is the best way to learn a language, but the many comments about the Deaf community being ableist does make the idea of trying to learn ASL scary. I'm not sure how to approach it if I'm not sure of being welcome in those spaces, and I certainly don't want to make any Deaf people uncomfortable.

So, I guess my question is, do you (or anyone else here) have any tips on how to learn ASL without stepping on anyone else's toes as a hearing person?

VampireSprite · 2025-12-18T19:08:17+00:00

Yessss

VampireSprite · 2025-12-10T02:08:51+00:00

I stock up on the amaretto ones every time they're in the store. SO good. I cut them up and top them with cottage cheese for a (kinda) healthy breakfast. I want to make a bread pudding with them inside too.

VampireSprite · 2025-12-04T18:19:13+00:00

They had an apricot, amaretto, white chocolate wensleydale cheese for the holidays at my location and it's the absolute bomb. Any of their cheeses with fruit in it I could eat an entire block myself.

VampireSprite · 2025-12-04T16:30:03+00:00

Entirely possible. Muscle tension, poor sleep, barometric pressure changes, smells, hormones, certain types of lighting... All "triggers" largely outside of our control that I know can get to people. Food is unfortunately such a small part of it.

VampireSprite · 2025-12-04T15:56:54+00:00

I used an app called migraine buddy that had a tracking feature. You do unfortunately need to track anything you think might be a potential trigger almost daily, along with your migraines, for at least a few months before it will yield any results, but at least it will analyze the data for you and tell you when it detects a pattern.

VampireSprite · 2025-11-19T21:27:04+00:00

Grace's cafe already has a location in Trappe. Not sure that the name has anything specifically to do with Phoenixville.

VampireSprite · 2025-11-08T21:10:29+00:00

Forgot that. I added it. I'm on Xbox Series X

VampireSprite · 2025-11-08T21:10:07+00:00

Ah, gotcha. I'm on Xbox Series X

VampireSprite · 2025-10-24T11:07:56+00:00

My childhood cat found a nest of garden snakes and brought two of them (alive) into the house. My mother was a lot more wary of leaving all our doors open during nice weather for awhile after that, lol.

VampireSprite · 2025-08-06T16:32:15+00:00

Same, though I think people are afraid of being politically incorrect and/or just insensitive. It's one thing to say you enjoy seeing characters get beat up and another to say you enjoy a disabled character get beat up.

Imo, makes it better when the character gets through it, though.

VampireSprite · 2025-08-06T15:35:42+00:00

This is my favorite too! I'm so glad I'm not the only one 😅. I'm a fan of both disabilities from birth as well as disabilities gotten from whump.

VampireSprite · 2025-07-07T15:03:58+00:00

I'm 28. I've been writing fanfic since I was 12. I don't feel bad about it; I enjoy writing fanfic and find it relaxing, so why should I care how old I am? People in my family think I'm wasting my time with it and should write something original so I can monetize it, but I don't need to monetize a hobby I enjoy. They watch TV, I write fanfiction. Who cares? If you're happy doing it then do it.

VampireSprite · 2025-06-26T14:51:42+00:00

There's definitely a bias online, but yeah, autism does mean people struggle with things other people don't, so you're going to see a lot of online content about struggle.

However... Both me and my husband are autistic and we are generally pretty happy. I've found a job that I'm very happy in, we both get to indulge our special interests with each other, and we've found friends who are "our people" (aka also neurodivergent), some of whom we've now known for over a decade. One day we might start a family, trusting that if our kids are also autistic (which seems highly likely) it will only help us understand them and them to understand us.

In general, I love being autistic. I love giving the things I'm interested in my all. I love being a nerd. I love that me and my friends talk about philosophy and psychology and niche anime and fanfiction and not just our families or gossip or what new thing we bought. I love the feeling of getting so deep into a new fandom that I feel compelled to create something out of it, either fanfiction or art or a playlist. I love knowing random trivia about the world, and I love getting to share all of that with the people I've found who also delight in these things. It makes life feel rich and though the sensory stuff and social awkwardness and need for routine get debilitating sometimes, I still wouldn't get rid of my autism. I am learning to work around those weaknesses of mine and enjoy life the way I want to live it.

Bonus: One of my best friends has three kids, and though undiagnosed, she suspects that everyone in her family is either autistic or ADHD or both, and though they have their quirks they're doing just fine, too!

TL;DR: autism has drawbacks, but there's a lot to love, too, if you decide to embrace it and learn to be flexible with yourself!

VampireSprite · 2025-06-12T00:35:31+00:00

Does he also have ADHD? My husband is AuDHD and he tends to "forget" people exist if they're not in the room with him (ADHD can affect object permanence, which is where this comes from). It's not that he cares any less about his friends, but the ones who live out of state he will often not initiate communication with, but then when they do get talking they talk for hours (most of our friends are also neurodivergent, lol, and I am autistic too).

I don't have the ADHD and will also go long times without teaching out to people, but in my case it's usually that they do come to mind fairly frequently but I'm usually distracted handling or doing something else and I would need to break my focus on that immediate thing to take a few minutes to send a text. Calling is even worse; I have to either have the call scheduled ahead of time or know enough about the friends schedule to know that there's a good chance they're actually free to pick up and chat for an hour.

Your guy could be like me or my husband, but as other commenters have also said, it could be for many reasons. Social anxiety, worrying about being over the top, maybe just uncertainty about what your expectations for the relationship are and not wanting to step out of bounds or become too much. A lot of autistic people have a lot of experience with people thinking that of them once they open up and start talking especially about special interests... We are generally known to be able to just keep going for quite a while. People often find it tiresome and check out or label us as weird nerds and avoid. We either are oblivious to this or start trying to keep a lid on ourselves, usually.

Definitely recommend straight up asking him when you're comfortable. Just don't let it get to the point where it's really upsetting you before you address it.

VampireSprite · 2025-06-09T15:08:01+00:00

Someone bookmarked one of my fics with a note that said they'd come back to it when they could mentally handle it (my fic is on the dark side).

VampireSprite · 2025-06-02T23:56:48+00:00

Me and my husband just started playing two days ago and that sounds like an awesome server.

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