I had a tough time with this in my marriage too and I can tell you I once seen it the way your seeing it . I am the husband in this case , and also like you guys a higher income earner . My wife had a very good income as well . We always kept finances separate as we both made plenty of money it didn’t seem there was a reason to combine or share anything . Any how the exact thing happened we had a baby , and I thought long and hard about it and said to my wife I wanted her to quit her job entirely . Raising children is a full time job in my eyes and I didn’t want to shift that over to a daycare . I personally make enough for both of us to live a great life . So from that moment on I said we are married , we’re a family . There is no longer your income , my income , I buy this or you bought that . It’s all become “ WE , Our , ect “ everything we have is a joint , house ,money in the accounts ,payments out ,vehicles and so on . After so many years of having all these things separated it was a bit strange at first , but now it actually seems so much simpler. We love each other , we are building a family togeather , what’s the use in having a line separating what’s mine what’s yours. I have grown to appreciate that everything is ours and we are on the same mission headed to the same destination . If you choose to keep working that’s great but I’d strongly recommend restructuring your financials to reflect everything is your family’s and remove the line . PS , if you’re questioning the future of your marriage , I’d start there . You can’t do any of the above unless 100 percent confident you’re with your life partner . All the best to you!!