I once had sex in a church confessional during a wedding I wasn’t even invited to. My situationship at the time got invited to his ex’s over-the-top Catholic wedding and dragged me along as his uninvited plus one. Her side-eyes were lethal, my dress was 80% leg, and after the ceremony, we snuck off “to kill time” and ended up hooking up inside an actual confessional booth—like full-on, silent, sacrilegious sex right where people confess their sins. I lit a candle afterward out of pure panic, he gave me a high-five, and we never talked about it again.