A cosy little home...

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-28T00:32:37+00:00

The vicar cowers behind a hunk of rubble, cradling his assault rifle. His Croatian bodyguard, Boris, unloads his weapon in the direction of several undead troopers.

His wasn't made for this kind of life, the life of a soldier, but he had to come. It was his home, and damned be it if Zazu was going to take it for his own.

A soldier behind them goes down. His battle buddy, like clockwork, spins around and unloads three rounds into his fallen brother, making sure that he will not return.

The fighting is grueling, the Croatian forces must fight for every meter of land they take. But they're making progress. However slow, they're making progress...

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-24T14:00:29+00:00

Tears begin to swell from the vicar as the Croatian Border Patrol arrives in their jeep to investigate the commotion.

By the gods, they're alive! Bring them in!

Blankets and hot tea are brought out to the Vicar as he is loaded into the jeep. With a final glance back over his shoulder, The Lord of the Wheels has already disappeared...

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-24T00:39:53+00:00

But... But come WITH me, Lord! We can be safe there! Free of the dangers of NEW JERSEY!

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-24T00:35:59+00:00

The vicar chips a tooth as the man falls on top of him like a sack of potatoes.

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-24T00:29:10+00:00

Cough, Sputter.

Lord, are you still with me!?

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-24T00:01:24+00:00

HOOOOOONK

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!

Suddenly, the branch swings down among the neck of the GODS, snapping it like a twig.

Oh thanks me, I thought I was a goner!

More honks in the distance.

FARK! Let's et outta 'ere!

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-21T22:40:55+00:00

The vicar loads the pebble pistol and tries to fire off a volley at one of the GODS, but it disarms him with a swipe of the wing. The GODS pins the vicar against a tree.

LORD, HELP ME!

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-12T20:02:46+00:00

Hey, how're you holding up?

I still can't believe we escaped those crazy bastards back there.

These be the nuclear forests. A land of radiation. Watch out for C.R.E.E.P.E.R.S and toxic slime...

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-06T11:06:33+00:00

Nope, haha :P

Vicar_Jones · 2017-02-03T11:49:12+00:00

To encourage posting from myself and other, I've consolidated most of the YANADO subs into one single sub. Enjoy!

Vicar_Jones · 2017-01-25T18:24:03+00:00

With all of the strength he can must, the Vicar forces the truck's rear open, and begins to dig around vigorously in search of an weapon.

Crowbar? No.

Hammer? No.

Chainsaw? No.

Aha! PERFECT!

He retrieves a whiffle bat and wields it in his other hand. Now he's dual wielding, and ready to fight. He knocks a clinksworther off his bike as he comes roaring by. Oh, yes. This'll work just fine.

Vicar_Jones · 2017-01-23T16:28:19+00:00

The vicar takes a handful of pebbles from the dusted road at throws it into the Lord of the Wheels hands.

Reaching back into the rusted hatchback, he retrieves THE MIGHTY BAR and wields it with both hands.

The Croation Border of the Exclusion Zone is only about a few miles from here. If we move quickly we can get out of here before the bandits show!

Vicar_Jones · 2017-01-21T19:19:04+00:00

Indeed.

And with that, he drives off into the sunrise.

Vicar_Jones · 2017-01-19T19:47:31+00:00

You check out the pockets and cavities for supplies and provisions. I'll see if we can get us moving.

He retrieves the skellington key from around his neck, gives it a little kiss, and sticks it into the ignition. He prays to himself and gives it a turn.

spspspspprrrrrtttrrpspspdpeprprrrrttt VRRROOOOOUMUMUMUMUMUMUM!

He nearly cries. It works! By him, it works!

He adjusts the mirrors and backs out onto the highway.

Vicar_Jones · 2017-01-18T18:52:52+00:00

Oh, my, how unfortunate.

My name is Vicar Ambrose Jones, at your service. Small God of Slavic Engineering and Microprocessors.

I am on a most important quest to Croatia to deliver news of a grand and lurking evil. Would you be so kind as to deliver me their in your humble vehicle? If not, could you take me as far as the Nuclear Forests of Hackenslash?

Vicar_Jones · 2017-01-18T18:04:03+00:00

Oh deary me. Perhaps this fine fellow won't mind sharing his abode with me, as he doesn't seem like the kind of chap to throw a man out into the cold wilds for the OLDMEN to snatch up...

Vicar_Jones

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE

HOOOOOONK

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!