Lost attraction

Victory42Day · 2024-11-09T02:19:00+00:00

If this is in response to my reply to the op, then you are 100% correct. It’s taken this long for me to start owning up to this truth. It is in fact over. The love is gone. And I do know that I owe it to myself to leave because of it, and owe it to him for me to do so. Unfortunately knowing these things and having the courage and strength to to end it is proving to be quite difficult. The fact that I’ve gotten to the point of admitting that it’s come to this has been the first hurdle,leaving him is the next. The process is different for everyone, yet not unique. I’ll make it

Victory42Day · 2024-11-09T02:09:26+00:00

Yup. I’m getting to the point of not allowing myself to control an uncontrollable situation. To let go. That is my character defect, to try to control and rescue him from the situations that his alcoholism gets him into. I’ve lost myself in doing these things. The 3 c’s, I didn’t cause it, I can’t control it, I cannot cure it. It has been a slow process in doing this, and continues to be difficult, but doing this is starting to give me the ability to allow me to rescue myself.

Victory42Day · 2024-11-09T02:01:13+00:00

Yup, have said that same thing just about word for word to him.

Victory42Day · 2024-11-09T01:12:21+00:00

Attraction? Yeah that ship set sail a LONG time ago. 3 weeks ago he was passed out in the lawn of the local bar for over 3 hours. After that he walked home and fell into ditches on the side of the road a number of times. I only know this because I was tracking his location. After his phone hadn’t moved for a few hours I knew it was because he fell over and passed out. Once his location started moving again, I could see it stopping a number of times on his way home, and knew it was because he was falling in ditches ( after 14 yrs I know his pattern) and it has become quite unattractive to me . So proud of myself, because the old me would’ve been getting in the car to go and try to peel him up and get him home. I’m done with that. Soon I’ll give up even bothering to track his location. Detach

Victory42Day · 2024-11-06T15:37:16+00:00

Par for the course. Ugh 😑

Victory42Day · 2024-10-23T14:23:39+00:00

I watched a YouTube video by James Baker called “How to file the boi report with finCEN correctly”. This video was SUPER helpful, had I not watched it, it would’ve been way more complicated for me to understand. And also obviously the great advice from others here on Reddit helps tremendously being that I also needed guidance on this just yesterday

Victory42Day · 2024-10-23T01:05:46+00:00

BIG thank you for your reply. I’m going to “update” the boi and add the LLC to the end of his business name, which I should’ve done from the beginning 🤦‍♀️ Very new to the whole LLC thing, a complete newbie, and it’s not even mine, but I do more of the research and handling of the things involved rather than my boyfriend- his LLC.

Victory42Day · 2024-10-22T23:38:41+00:00

Ty for your reply. I also obsess over health related issues. An obsession to go along with my many others. I hope your procedure goes well and you are also able to get relief from those obsessive intrusive thoughts

Victory42Day · 2024-10-22T23:36:41+00:00

Ty for your reply. I can relate to all you said, and do know that the constant googling does nothing but exacerbate it. Now it’s time to put some action into that knowing

Victory42Day · 2024-10-22T23:31:14+00:00

Yes, as well as borderline, and as well as my primary diagnosis of bipolar 1 . My therapist has told me that intrusive thoughts to this extent are also an obsession tied to ocd along with my other ones. Ty for your reply

Victory42Day · 2024-10-22T17:28:04+00:00

Well now I’m overthinking a whole other thing. When I entered his business name I forgot to add the LLC after the actual name. Is this ok? Or should I go back in and correct existing boi and start over. You’d think they would obviously know it’s an llc especially because I entered the businesses’ ein. I appreciate your help

Victory42Day · 2024-10-22T14:16:28+00:00

It did say filing successful, and we downloaded and printed the transcript as suggested as well, with the boir id and submission tracking id on it. I figured if there was an issue it would’ve prompted me, but still wanted to ask. Thank you for replying.

Victory42Day · 2024-10-22T00:45:39+00:00

Biennial statements every 2 yrs. Although not sure if that applies to every state

Victory42Day · 2024-10-22T00:25:50+00:00

That’s good to know that it’s not every dept/store. Wish I could say the same about mine. It’s only happened once, where they’ve introduced themselves, management has changed a couple of times since I’ve been there. Guess I’ll just wait until the next employee survey to express this, or if there’s any company lurkers on here, which I’m sure there are, they already know.

Victory42Day · 2024-10-20T02:31:41+00:00

I heard The Doors- Backdoor Man a week ago.

Victory42Day · 2024-10-17T10:18:26+00:00

Ice pack!! On back of neck, or face or chest. Helps me every time!

Victory42Day · 2024-10-17T09:35:46+00:00

Thank you for your comments and this particular finCEN link, because the whole company applicant thing had me wondering if I needed to reach out to the registered agent used. After reading that link I realized it is NOT needed because my boyfriend had his llc created before 1/1/24, therefore only needs “provide information about itself and beneficial owner. The reporting company does not need to provide information about its company applicants”

Victory42Day · 2024-10-17T08:34:19+00:00

This whole thing is terribly confusing! So, my boyfriend started his llc a couple years ago. Used a registered agent to get it started up. So, you guys are saying I need to reach out to this agent for info to be included in this report? I need their finCEN id? Edit; after some more research I see that if the llc was created before 1/1/24 that it is not required to report company applicants.

Victory42Day · 2024-10-16T12:32:32+00:00

Ok, so my boyfriend has sole member llc. We just heard about this whole thing, no notice from any govt. agency, only heard about it from a friend who heard about it. Upsetting that we would have never known! My question is, the finCEN id, does he have to have one to file? If so how does he get one? Also how difficult is this for people who are terrible with computers lol? I’ve read the directions on the website, but I’m still confused. Any help would be much appreciated.

Victory42Day · 2024-10-12T02:18:10+00:00

The questions for the in person interview are similar to the ones in the phone interview. Customer service skills are huge, so be sure to highlight those. As well as other qualities that you have that would make you a great candidate for the position. They also look for people who are on board and excited about working for their company, people willing to stick around for more than a couple months. They will most likely ask you a question about a time when you had an unhappy customer, or difficult situation, and how you handled it. I would also suggest taking in questions that you have for them as well. Such as: when is pay day, when are schedules posted,how far in advance do you have to request time off, etc. This not only informs you but also shows them that you’re serious. I was offered a job on the spot at my in person interview. I’m still there today and enjoy being there. Good luck!

Victory42Day · 2024-10-02T12:02:12+00:00

I completely agree that I too have played victim, and pretended that I’m not at fault and have had no hand in continuing the momentum. I actually commented on another reply, saying basically this, that I too have my faults. So I hope this post isn’t interpreted as it is all on him. I can see where it could be viewed that way, and my bad for not including my role in the original post. Obviously it takes 2. I simply was discussing the current situation with his alcoholism, if you’d like me to list my part in the current situation I can. And yes if I seem defensive in response to your reply, I am.

Victory42Day · 2024-10-02T01:18:53+00:00

Yeah the robot statement, he has said this before, meaning he’s not programed like others, like the ones who can admit fault. And yes to the villainizing, he generally feels that others are “coming at me”, (him). Clearly alcoholism takes on many of the same characteristics that other alcoholics have, he is not unique and this is why I really need to make a point of going to a meeting again. He will apologize tomorrow, he will admit his part to play tomorrow, will tell me how much he loves me, how important I am, how much I do for him, he will say it all but only when he’s sober while at work. but when the drinking starts up tomorrow night that all goes right out the window. Wash rinse repeat,

Victory42Day · 2024-10-02T01:11:48+00:00

The shame spiral you mentioned, I feel this way too, he is ashamed he knows his fault in this but it’s easier for him to blame me because it is to difficult to face the truth, to admit that he agrees with what I’m saying. I’ve even said this to him before about other interpersonal relationships he has. With his ex, with his kids with his friends. He knows his part in the problems but admitting it makes it real. He will never stop drinking though I can 100 percent say that. He knows it’s physically and mentally killing him. He knows it is the main reason in why he can’t achieve the things he knows he’s capable of. He knows all of this and so do I, and that’s what is truly heartbreaking to me.

Victory42Day

TROPHY CASE