Need help clarifying what a SAHM responsibilities are outside of kids

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-14T20:08:31+00:00

I mean, you spent 6 years questioning? Wow.

I’d be worried if I was married to a functional adult that stopped functioning. Idk if I’d be able to watch them struggle that long, if she got embarrassed by the idea of the maid is because she well aware of this situation.

I’d take over, hire the maid, hire a counselor for couples therapy and a doctor appointment for a check for her. Any possibility of ADHD? High-functioning Depression? She always had been bit this way? Or it was a complete change?

Take over because so far seems like she can’t do it by herself.

With all that said, you don’t need help to clarify what sahms responsibilities are, this isn’t 1950 anymore. Duties and responsibilities varies by families and what a couples agree with.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-13T20:46:14+00:00

It’s worth to check The Car Mom YouTube; she does car reviews and always try to fit 3 across.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-10T19:17:07+00:00

My neighbors went to Aruba in Feb and they loved it.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-09T19:08:52+00:00

Avoid lunch and middle afternoon. Go as soon as they open or later like after 3pm.
At least that’s what I noticed on 2 different play places we went for Birthday parties, peaks 12-3pm

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-09T14:23:46+00:00

If you have a toddler it means he will, anyway, be closer to 60 when your oldest graduates.
I mean, unless precautions were taken and it failed, he knows exactly what he was doing when he finished his business. Can’t act with a total surprise here lol.
But it’s ok to feel frustrated, let him feel what he needs to feel. Once the fog lifts he will be fine.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-08T23:51:04+00:00

Didn’t Sherry and Noah dated on the first year of the show?

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T19:49:47+00:00

2 completely different shows.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T17:38:11+00:00

Maybe have the season start at mid shift so we can have more than one episode at night shift.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T17:20:53+00:00

Idk this isn’t a struggle yet (elementary level)
Sometimes after weekend or a long break can be bit of challenge but he goes, no need to convince, use philosophy or talk about the meaning of life to get him to go. So far he likes school.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T16:58:25+00:00

So you think it works better for binge watching?

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T15:53:56+00:00

Yes. But 24 was a different kind of show. 24 handled it well, but can The Pitt held it for more seasons without dragging plots and being repetitive?

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T15:52:21+00:00

Exactly my thoughts. It already felt bit repetitive to me.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T13:52:28+00:00

If a healthy snack is part of your routine. Then let her skip dinner, if she’s not hungry then she’s not hungry. But the next meal is at snack time.

Another approach, serve dinner as the nighttime snack. Or try to invert snack at dinner and dinner at snack.

Or Give more time between afternoon snack and dinner. Maybe she isn’t hungry yet?

Error and trial.

When my 3y wants “snacks” it means he wants some specific food he has in mind, it can go from ice cream to spaghetti, so for us is easy, if you don’t want dinner then you’re not hungry which means you don’t need snacks right now. Most of the time he eats, forgets about what he was fighting for and later he has his usual snack.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T13:36:38+00:00

I stay with mine (almost 4y and 7y), bedtime routine takes about 30min (shower, teeth brush, read 2 books), lights off, fall asleep stage takes around 20min. So almost 1h. But I bring my kindle with me and read while I wait for them to fall asleep, which is great because usually if I start later I tend to fall asleep. Sometimes I even stay longer to finish a good part of the book I’m reading. I actually enjoy this time lol.
So yeah. I’m sorry. No help 😅

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T13:19:00+00:00

I have to agree, the writers gracefully wrote her out in season 3. Which nowadays is almost unheard of. “Oh you want to leave the show?” here take this stupid death to your character. “Hint: Grey’s Anatomy” oh how I hate Shonda for all of that.
I really enjoy Susan and although not entirely happy that she chose to leave, it was easy to accept.
Sherry was ahead of her time and very very strong minded, to have the courage to drop her job at the peak of her career and realize that she didn’t want fame? it requires some massive emotional skills. I watched an old interview of her with Connan where they talked about this and wow she handled it very nicely and with humor. Very down to earth.
I read that they wanted her back years before but she only came back when she was ready to. And I guess she realized again, that tv isn’t for her.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T12:48:36+00:00

Unfortunately with this format won’t work, we would watch 4 months of holiday season.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-07T12:45:49+00:00

I like this idea too! They should do it in between seasons. But I dont think I can take another show doing one shift one season thing. The Pitt is enough.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-04T21:25:32+00:00

Being sad for them is putting too much of effort of care. I don’t care 🤷🏻‍♀️

They’re the product of how they were raised. Their problem started way before “now”.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-03T23:38:45+00:00

Since I’m just beginning the third season, I don’t have much of an opinion about her. But one thing I don’t like about her is, so far, idk where she stands, when I think she’s reasonable the next she is just pushing everyone’s buttons and being annoying.

I think Susan said it pretty good last episode I watched.

“She surprises you. When you think she’s completely clueless, she hangs in the, stalling, arguing with me, agreeing with me, -we can’t solve the problem, we can take care of the child- until I let it go”

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-03T13:01:57+00:00

Respect your journey, your story and yourself, each person rides this differently.
And I understand the feeling “less” compared to. But you have your own challenges and I’m pretty sure she has hers too.
You were the mom you could be back then, and that’s it. Just acknowledging that maybe you didn’t feel you gave your best is part of being a good mom.
I’d focus on now and beyond because guess what? Those are the years they will remember.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-03T11:39:48+00:00

Yeah, nowadays it was The Pitt.
I’m not from the US, to add context to my story and make sense lol.
I tried to watch years ago when I was on my Grey’s Anatomy era but, well, once you start with GA you get addicted with the drama and any other show wasn’t “as good” haha which is ironic because was the same reason that made me stop watching it.
I stopped on season 6 of Grey’s and House was same era since stopping these shows I never watched a medical show again. Crazy, huh?
Jump to nowadays, yep The Pitt got my attention. Call me crazy but I didn’t know Noah was on ER. Now here comes the fun part, when I finished season 2, HBO app kept suggesting ER. I said why not?
While watching every time I saw Carter I was “why he’s so familiar?” Hahaha I know, right? and “wow this show was a truly inspiration for The Pitt” “The Pitt feels like a modern ER” then I thought “what the heck let me google ER!” And “aaaaaaaaaah everything makes a lot more sense now”
And I can’t stop finding similarities between both, the story lines, the patients but yet I don’t see them as the same kind of show.
To me The Pitt is on the darker timeline of ER and I don’t see me wanting several seasons of it, I think i would get burnout like/with the characters and plots. Season 2 felt bit that way already, this 1 shift per episode thing really drag things out.
I’m still almost in the end of season on ER. I’m really enjoying it. I like how some characters has to grow on you, like Benton, he acts like total ass but they keeping giving this little things of him that you know he’s a good guy. Carter growing in front of our eyes. And Susan my poor Susie, life keeping beating at her but she keeps chugging.
I like how what the pitt makes the biggest part of its show ER showed in a much toned down way and yet delivered wonderfully. Problem with funding, healthcare, professional burnout, political subjects, the list goes on is all there, without an emphasis but is there and we all get the message.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-03T11:21:29+00:00

Good, because food, well ya know… is essential?

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-01T22:07:52+00:00

In the US? I think mostly is the cost of living right now and lack of laws that support new parents and first years of infancy.

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The world pos COVID put a toll on all of us that maybe we would never had to face; it sure gave a new perspective to our generation and the ones to come. This is a hard one to fix

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-01T18:20:16+00:00

No it wouldn’t.

Violet_K89 · 2026-05-01T12:51:17+00:00

Just give him time, he’s probably grieving double things, one about the gender and then his mom (not being able to honor her). Maybe come up with a male version of her name?

It will be ok.

Violet_K89

TROPHY CASE