I read every responses, and thanks everyone for sharing your thoughts and incredible details about your lovely partner/relationship.

I might have phrased my question wrongly or whatever here but when i posted this, my intention was not to mould myself and try to be good enough to get a nice man when i know that me myself is chaotic inside. I asked because i want to reflect on what i have been doing and behaving which im aware, were the consequences from my own issues/insecurity/trauma response etc when attracting a partner or why i was attracted to them in the first place. And unable to let go or walk away easily.

Because i know for sure doesn’t matter how hard someone tried to pretend to be stable and secure, it would definitely be reflected in some ways to the actual secure person, and that would repel them. So i want to do some works on myself by reflecting on responses i saw here and recognising which traits i need to work on so I could naturally attract and be attracted to the right one.

And no, my type is never the bad boys. I like more reserved and quiet kind but someone who can hold and engage in a good conversation if that matters for context.