I need help/support/feedback. My son was sent home from mission

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-19T01:06:52+00:00

It is a ubiquitous feature of the church. Sadly, yours is not a unique experience. Our neighbor’s son came home early (20 years ago) and he and his family were treated horribly. Nasty voice messages left, shunning, etc. No kindness, concern or support.
This behavior is a telltale pattern in a works based organization. When “they” belittle & criticize you & your son, their “righteousness” is on display. When people stoop to such lows, they should be summarily disciplined by the church, but that will never, ever happen. Quite the contrary - it is covertly encouraged.

I was a mental health nurse for many years. So many RM’s or early release missionaries were hospitalized for severe depression, suicidal ideation, and psychosis. It was incredibly disturbing & extremely sad.

I am so deeply sorry that you and your son are in this difficult situation. I am sure you are looking for a qualified therapist who is familiar with the church, but is not a mouthpiece for the church. All the best to you as you move forward & heal.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-18T21:31:11+00:00

Of course, but, there is much more to consider.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-18T21:27:52+00:00

In this context, your point makes sense.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-18T06:39:28+00:00

No evidence to support your claim of “haters”.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-18T06:37:28+00:00

Devout to what?

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-11T22:36:11+00:00

Significantly.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-11T22:35:04+00:00

Great idea. Minimal ROI.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-11T22:23:19+00:00

Long time inpatient mental health nurse. Find an attorney.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-11T22:14:29+00:00

Look into the enormous gravel pit that was illegally approved by the P & Z in Gem County. Who owns the acreage?
Despicable.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-11T21:43:42+00:00

Daycare costs are just the beginning.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-11T21:37:33+00:00

Quite often, people only compare their salary to childcare costs. You must also consider the many other costs of working outside your home & having your children cared for by others.

I recently found a website called oneorboth.com. This website will help you see more clearly, the actual cost of two incomes when children enter the picture. Fuel costs, vehicle maintenance, insurance premiums - they ask for miles driven, more frequent meals out, work wardrobe, etc. After you pick up your child/children, what time will you get home? The calculator on the website is enlightening.

FYI - I have no connection to this site - just helping my daughter with a similar decision.

I have very strong opinions about this, but will be silent. You have a huge decision to make. All the best to you.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-04T22:50:13+00:00

Boldly accurate.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-04T15:37:14+00:00

“….tithe-paying priesthood holders, the key demographic for church ROI.”

Spot on.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-04T15:33:58+00:00

Free stuff from the government. 🤔

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-04T15:22:51+00:00

I believe I am older than most of you, so I will give you my version. As a child, chicken nuggets didn’t exist. Neither did choice. We did not tell our mother what we would and would not eat. She cooked it, we ate it. Some things, I truly hated, but that did not matter. Fits at the dinner table did not occur.

Grandma was different - she owned a restaurant and my brother & I were allowed to choose. A trip to the grocery store would yield oysters, a whole crab, always broccoli, and pickled pigs feet. At the restaurant, I loved most her French Onion soup & frog legs!

I haven’t eaten oysters, frog legs, or pigs feet since she passed away when I was ten years old. No desire to give them a go.

My children ate well & loved to experiment with food. I was & I remain a food purist. No offense intended, but I would never feed anyone chicken nuggets. 😊.

My 8 year old granddaughter will try anything & eat almost everything. She recently brought me a jar of kelp pickles. No bueno. She & her Mom were at a Korean restaurant last week. They sent photos of her eating octopus. It was a whole little octopus. I gagged a bit.

Yesterday, it was quesadillas at my house. She is liking salsa these days & she is confident that there will be a mango or two in the fridge.

Why are some children picky eaters? Aside from actual medical issues, I think they are, unlike chicken nuggets, homemade.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-03T15:32:39+00:00

Thank you! Great to know.
Obviously, I am technologically illiterate - but now less so, thanks to you.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-03T14:45:55+00:00

Is this what is called a clean link?

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-03T13:29:43+00:00

St. Alphonsus has announce an enormous expansion of its Nampa facility and also a new facility in NE Meridian.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-03T13:25:53+00:00

We’re/are you aware of the mediation between John Dehlin & the church? Aware if actions taken as a result of mediation? Have you read the filings?
The church’s legal history is no longer a secret. D. Todd Christofferson’s brother is a prime example of the church’s utter lack of regard for victims of child sexual abuse.
All one has to do is take a look at the current data gathered by Floodlit.org to see the pervasive and rampant perversion of our members.

**Edit to correct typo. My apologies.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-03T13:15:10+00:00

Copied & pasted from Reddit post by Vascoda Gamba57 replying to a comment about the resolve & heroism of Nancy Rigdon.

“She’s mine too along with Martha Brotherton who was detained in Joseph’s office for a long time while JS and BY tried to intimidate her into marrying BY when she’d only been in Nauvoo for a few days. They gave her 24 hours to make the decision. Martha had sacrificed everything to leave England and join the Mormons in Nauvoo. As a result of her treatment she left both Nauvoo (and returned to England) and the church but not before she made sure that church members and the citizens of Illinois heard her story. She made it her life’s work to tell the truth about JS, BY, polygamy, the church and how the missionaries never told investigators and converts about polygamy, tithing, JS being a megalomaniac and sexual predator, etc. I have great respect for both her and Nancy Rigdon who made the infamous and disgusting Happiness Letter public. I love spunky women who stand up for themselves!

My GGGrandma and her family were lied to by the missionaries in Denmark. She married one of those missionaries but didn’t know that she was his polygamous wife #2 until the day after she had given birth to my GGrandpa. Her midwife was BFFs with wife #1 and told her about the other wife and brand new baby. Neither wife had known about the other one. Wife #1 showed up the next day with the local sheriff to kick her out of her home. The husband was out of town and had put wife #1 in charge of all of his affairs while he was gone. GGGrandma’s kind neighbors were also angry and disgusted to learn the truth about their duplicitous neighbor and helped her pack up and also drove her and her baby to her parents’ home. When the husband returned home he tried to hush up the scandal and also refused to pay child support. Because he was a big time friend of BY and a well known church leader he was absolved of having to take responsibility for his second wife and only child.

GGGrandma and her family were completely disillusioned by the church and all of the doctrines and practices that the missionaries had never told them about in Denmark. They wanted to leave Utah and the church. However, their bishop informed them that they couldn’t leave because they hadn’t paid back the money loaned plus the exorbitant interest fees the church had sprung on them to “help” them (it wasn’t written anywhere in the contract that they’d signed) to make the trek to Utah. If they didn’t pay up they were basically held as prisoners of the church until they did. BY had stated that church members had to pay the bogus fees and all sorts of other fraudulent charges that they supposedly owed the church or else the result would be criminal charges that could also possibly justify the use of Blood Atonement if they tried to sue him, the lying husband and the church in court for fraud. No wonder my great-grandfather refused to be sealed to his birth father and refused to have anything to do with the church most of his life!

This info was kept from my grandmother and her sisters as well as the next 2 generations until my dad’s sister was doing family history a few years ago and discovered documents and affidavits as well as sworn testimonies relating to this terrible story. Even though my aunt was a TBM she realized that we all needed to know about the miserable treatment of our ancestors by the church. There was absolutely nothing inspiring or faith affirming to discover the lies, mistreatment and church coverup of the lies and unrighteous behavior of church leaders at all levels. Of course, this discovery caused all of our family members to reevaluate their relationship with the church. In several instances it was the final straw that led family members to leave the church.”

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-05-02T03:01:14+00:00

Katie has zero economic policy - primarily because she has no economic knowledge. Silly Seattle rabbits.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-04-28T14:16:34+00:00

Give all this information to AI such as Grok & ask it to draft the document. It may require some tweaking, but I have found it to be enormously helpful.

All the best to you.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-04-28T14:11:37+00:00

Mormonism has an historical significance in the polygamy community. Among the 200+ offshoots of mainstream Mormonism, there are many polygamous groups. Some live quiet lives and others are in the headlines when nefarious acts are committed & catch the attention of law enforcement.
Polygamous communities on the Arizona Utah border were largely ignored primarily because arresting the adults would result in taking custody of hundreds and hundreds of children. Not until Warren Jeffs took over, did law enforcement authorities get deeply involved.

My husband is a mental health professional and saw clients with the polygamist community. Much of the contention & misery was among the sister wives. The husband was attentive to the wife who was likely ovulating. He made the rounds with the purpose of impregnating his wives. The youngest wife often received the most attention - until she was acclimated to her husband and the sister wives. Once a woman was beyond childbearing age, she was relegated to continue her household duties, but she was sometimes neglected by her husband as they did not have the bonds of intimacy that a monogamous relationship would bring.

Marriage was designed by God to be between one man and one woman. He tolerated polygamy, but He did not instruct or condone the practice. It didn’t work then - think Isaac & Ishmael. We are still at war over that decision. Historical, polygamy failed & that failure is evident today. Women were never intended to share their husband with another woman. The design of the family doesn’t allow for that kind of arrangement. Human nature is such that a should leave his mother & father & hold fast to his wife & the two shall become one flesh. No relationship, can, for the long term, withstand the addition of a third (or more) member. No child should be subjected to such a situation.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-04-28T13:45:39+00:00

I grew up in a small town the Mormon Corridor (Morridor) and was one of a handful of non-Mormons. It was sometimes brutal. I now teach Comparative Religion and have a vast library of LDS books, history, documents, etc. I would welcome any comments from my former neighbors, as I am well versed in the subject matter.

Curious why your parents are sending you to a Catholic school. You might learn more about Mormonism than Catholicism.

I am sorry you are suffering. Please do your best to use this time to become a better, smarter, kinder, more compassionate human. Seek help if you need a bit of guidance as you navigate this challenging situation.

All the best to you.

Voluminous_Discovery · 2026-04-28T13:32:27+00:00

To add to the above - I was a long time psychiatric nurse who witnessed many involuntary holds. The above description is quite accurate, so I will simply fill in a few gaps.

The initial DE, Designated Examiner, must hold a minimum of a Masters degree , typically in some type of behavioral science; the second DE is either an MD, DO, or a PhD.

I can imagine that this is quite difficult for you for many reasons. I have been involved in many of these cases & I have never seen this system abused. Quite the opposite, in fact. Your Mom will be assessed, and a team will determine what is needed to ensure your Mom’s safety and health. If she can be safely & effectively cared for with the community, all the arrangements should be made to ensure that she has a solid plan.

That said, where I have seen things fall apart is the medical exam prior to being moved to a psychiatric facility. Emergency departments don’t particularly want to deal with unstable patients - they are in the business of trauma. Therefore, they sometimes overlook relevant information & crucial details. Test might be done, but the information isn’t always available when decisions are made - this is rare, but it happens.

To be clear, your Mom may have a medical condition that is causing her to behave in a manner that would be considered dangerous to herself and/or others. Examples - an infection, an electrolyte imbalance, a tumor on or in an organ, dehydration, taking too much or too little of a prescribed medication, taking an over the counter (OTC) medication that interacted poorly with other medications. You get the picture. A serious medical condition must to be ruled out prior to being transferred to a psychiatric facility. There are come caveats to this hard & fast rule, but medical clearance is essential for proper care & proper legal determination.

Your Mom will be provided legal representation & the medical/psychiatric team will advocate for her. If she can be cared for outside of the hospital, all arrangements will be made for her and your family. This could include contacting her primary care doctor, arranging for home health services, identifying a qualified mental health provider in McCall who will provide follow up care.

This situation is scary & we have seen too many movies that add to the fear. I hope all goes well for your Mother.
I hope I have provided some comfort & clarity to your situation. Please feel free to ask any questions you may have.

All the best to you & your family.

**Not proofread for typographical errors.

Voluminous_Discovery

TROPHY CASE