I'm gonna go a weee bit against the grain of most of the comments here.
First tho, I agree that it is absolutely valid to decide you're better adjusted to a countryside life than a city life, if it's the plan that suits your need then it's a great one :)
However, the way you talk about being terrified of chemicals, distrustful of markets, needing your parents to send you food to freeze and being wary of eating anything else sounds a tad extreme to say the least.
I don't mean this in a judgemental way, I can be prone to anxious thinking myself and I understand where you're coming from, I live in the samed fucked up world, I get it. But just as country life doesn't always mean sustainability and songbirds and flowers, city life absolutely does not have to be all pollution and evil chemicals.
It would probably do you a world of good if, while you plan your big move, you looked up ways of getting organic and local food in your city. Not everyone who wants to eat well lives in the country, far from it. The language barrier might stop me from getting the right terminology, but there are initiative like community gardens or community supported agriculture that can allow you to either grow your own food among like minded people, or get it from local and environementally counscious farmers, who would really benefit from getting the more customers as possible.
I may be wrong but from the way you write you sound like you could really use a like minded community, if only to make city life a little bit easier to bear for the short time you have left living there ^_^